Latest Posts by agustdyoons - Page 2

attention pledis university !!  do you have something you want to say to a special someone, but can’t seem to find the right words or even the courage? why not anonymously (or don’t be anonymous, completely up to you) send a message and dedicate a song to them?  love on the air. airing every saturday at 1pm on pledis radio!

suhnshinehaos presents…

love on the air : a joshua hong smau

synopsis… joshua hong wants you to know how he feels about you, but god forbid he actually say it out loud. instead, he settles on the next best thing : dedicating a song to you every week on the campus radio. too bad you’re too dense to actually figure out it’s all for you.

pairing : joshua hong x gn!reader

genre/s : non-idol au, university au, childhood friends to ???, so much pining, fluff, a bit of angst, honestly so corny and cheesy just- beware dfghjks

will likely contain : food mentions, swearing (will update as i go on)

status :: completed !

—  parts + note under the cut

Keep reading

Hii! Its me again! The anon who requested the Jihoon x perfect reader. I perfectly understand and I don't blame u at all! It's ok if u don't want to write it anymore. But if u ever decide to finish writing it, here are some of the parts I requested (Tbh, I don't remember much of what I requested):

- Jihoon and the reader are academic rivals

- They get paired up for a project (because they are the top of the class)

- The project makes them closer. Close enough for Jihoon to crush on the reader

- Because he saw her (or them. Depends if u want to write it in a gender neutral pov) with another classmate, he sorta gets jealous

- This leads to him exposing his crush hehe

Tysm for taking the time to read this! <33

Green Tea Latte

Pairing: Jihoon x fem!reader (ft. Wonwoo and Soonyoung, mentions of the rest of Seventeen, mentions of Red Velvet's Joy aka Park Sooyoung :))

Synopsis: Jihoon is not the jealous type, but you make him green in more ways than he can handle.

Genre: Fluff, crack, more angst than I was intending, jealous!jihoon, perfectionist!jihoon, hardworking!reader, kind of E2L?, high school!au, FACS class, mild baseball!au

Warning: Use of profanity, mentions of parents passing away 😕 (reader lives with her older brother), food, one joke about polyamory, improper childcare of a doll, jealousy, insecurities, unedited (I apologize . . . I couldn't find a beta reader and I wasn't gonna go back and read all of this because my own work makes me cringe - I'll fix it some day T^T), inaccurate portrayal of high school, jihoon is quite crass at the beginning - I think that's it? Please lmk if there's more!

WC: 9.7K

Permanent taglist: @nanamioo @bibinnieposts

A/N: Anon who requested this 😭😭😭 My sincerest apologies for finishing this so dang late! Thank you for requesting Jihoon btw! Initially, this plot was set out for Jeonghan, but I figured. just maybe I could spin it for Jihoon :) I've struggled for a long time to find a good concept for him, but alas, here we are! I hope it lives up to your expectations 💙 I also apologize in advance - I'm a tad of a masochist, so if the ending isn't what you were expecting, I'm sorry 😅

“And last, but not least, we’ll have one group of three: Y/N, Jihoon, and Wonwoo,” Ms. Choi announced, quickly slapping his roster shut with one hand. His eyes scanned the classroom for any signs of confusion. “If there are no other questions, please find your partners and come check out one of the infant dolls. I’ll also give you the packet that contains all the instructions and worksheets for this final project – please review it tonight and have questions ready for class tomorrow.”

With the clap of her hand, students all around you started shuffling around the room to make way to their partners. You, on the other hand, remained seated in your desk in the third row by the open windows, eyes trained on your hands clasped in front of you. The spring humidity seemed to grow increasingly uncomfortable and no amount of fan or breeze could stifle the sweat sticking your hair to your forehead. Was your uniform jacket always this itchy and heavy?

Slowly, you craned your neck to look to the other side of the room to see if he was making his way over. When you caught a glimpse of him, Jihoon was sitting sideways in his seat, one arm resting on his desk and the other slung over the head of his chair. His facial expression, his eyes narrowed at you with the slightest crinkle in between his brows as if he was glaring at you. 

His backpack slung loosely over his shoulder, Wonwoo collapsed lazily into the seat in front of you. Despite the loud scraping of the chair against the white tiled floor, you paid no mind to him. A heavy sigh left Wonwoo’s lips as he leaned back against the window and glanced over, pushing up his black-rimmed glasses to better follow your line of sight. 

Wonwoo already knew: The final project for Family and Consumer Science was going to be interesting. 

Lee Jihoon hated you and he never tried to hide it. The whole senior class, even some of the teachers, knew that he had a strong distaste for you. Jihoon was never really a people person; he was stoic and kept to himself. If not in school, most of his hours were spent on three things: studying, baseball, and music. His only true friend was Soonyoung; everyone else, he was either acquaintances with or good teammates at best. Even then, Jihoon and Soonyoung’s friendship was questionable as the former seemed annoyed half the time they’re spotted together. 

You were special, however – to put it nicely. Ever since you skipped the latter half of your first year of high school and joined their class, their second year of high school, Wonwoo had never seen Jihoon so peeved by someone before. Wonwoo had an inkling it had to with the fact that you persistently knocked him off the podium as the number one student in all the courses you shared. 

Calculus? If Jihoon got a 98%, you got a 99%. 

The competition for Mr. Jung’s creative writing class? If Jihoon got second, you got first for best story – granted, only the two of you and Joshua had entered for extra credit. 

Ms. Park’s impossible biology lab practical? Jihoon was happy with his A, until he heard you aced it. 

To put it simply, the two of you were academic rivals and never had to work together on group projects until now – with Wonwoo, of course. 

“Hi,” Wonwoo cleared his throat. This was his first time interacting with you. He had always seen you around in classes the two of you shared, but never made an effort to befriend you either. It wasn’t that you were cold, most of their classmates got along with you well – similarly to Jihoon, Wonwoo preferred keeping to himself as well. People watching high school students was a rather fun pass time. 

“So,” Wonwoo awkwardly tried again when you didn’t respond. He glanced over to see if you were paying any attention to him yet. He frowned and nudged your hand when he noticed your eyes were still lingering on Jihoon. You perked at the brush of his finger against your knuckles. 

“Hi,” Wonwoo greeted you again. 

“Hey,” you said softly. 

Wonwoo scratched the back of his head, “Class is going to end soon – should we go talk to him?”

“Uh, y-yeah, sure,” you muttered. Robotically, you slipped out of your desk and began walking down the aisle, weaving in between desks to get to Jihoon. Wonwoo followed in suit, though not as gracefully, jutting his hip into the edge of a few brown desks every now and then. 

You didn’t even have a chance to greet Jihoon, however.

“I’m going to ask Ms. Choi if I can do this assignment individually,” Jihoon deadpanned. Shoving his hands into his pants pocket, he stood up in front of you. His eyes flitted between Wonwoo and you. “You guys can be parents to your own stupid doll – I don’t have a problem being a single dad.”

. . . .

“This is stupid,” Jihoon spat, tossing the packet across the table. Wonwoo slowed the chewing, nervously lowering his red bean bread bun into his lap. He shared a knowing glance with you. 

“It is,” you sighed, nodding once. You reached over to the packet and flipped it open a couple pages. “But we have to do it to graduate.”

Jihoon paid no mind to your comment, still clearly upset that Ms. Choi wouldn’t let him do this final FACS project on his own. 

“The purpose of this assignment is to introduce you to the challenges and collaboration of parenthood and raising children,” Ms. Choi insisted sternly. 

“There are single parents out there, you know?” Jihoon had shot back.

“Lee Jihoon,” Ms. Choi warned. 

He lowered his guard and cleared his throat. 

“I well-aware that there are single parents out there, but there are not enough infants–”

“They are dolls,” Jihoon interrupted. 

“There are not enough infants for students to do this assignment individually,” Ms. Choi continued, ignoring the teenage boy’s snark comment. 

“Can I at least trade partners then?” Jihoon asked. 

“It’s important for you to learn how to work with others,” Ms. Choi straightened a stack of papers, clacking the short edge against her desk. “Even if you don’t get along with them. You do not exist in a void, Mr. Lee. Wonwoo and Y/N are good students – give them a chance, you might be surprised.”

Jihoon rolled his eyes when Ms. Choi turned back around. 

“Is there anything else you want to clarify about this assignment, Jihoon?” Ms. Choi asked, a stern hand on her hip when she turned around. 

“No,” he grumbled. 

“I’ll see you in class tomorrow then,” she dismissed him. Her eyes flitted to the awkward pair of students standing in the doorway behind Jihoon. “I believe your partners are waiting for you.”

And that’s how Jihoon found himself here: Sitting at a cramped table in the dinky convenience store down the street from school that is always out of Diet Coke because the three of you didn’t get time in class to discuss the project. 

“Essentially, we just have to take care of this baby for a month,” Wonwoo fingered through the packet, his eyes skimming over the thick of words, “Do the things on this checklist, discuss our experience as a group, and then turn-in a paper or diagram of our choice documenting our experience?”

“Yeah,” you agreed. You twiddle your thumbs, your eyes occasionally flitting to Jihoon sitting kitty corner to you. You were well aware he didn’t like you and that made you nervous. 

“Our experience should be interesting,” Wonwoo commented. He reached for his banana milk and took a long sip.

You furrowed your brows together in confusion. “Why?”

“Because it’s a polyamorous parenthood, duh,” Jihoon answered for Wonwoo. The former choked on his banana milk, coughing up a fit. 

You blushed, shrinking back into your seet, suddenly feeling very uncomfortable between the boys. Wonwoo eyed you nervously, noticing the way you clasped your thighs together, sticking your hand underneath your thighs, and shifted nervously in your seat. 

“Dude,” Wonwoo warned.

Jihoon shrugged. “Am I lying?”

Wonwoo sighed. Indeed Jihoon disliked you, but did he have to be borderline harassing you like this?

“Don’t say shit like that – It makes it uncomfortable for all of us,” Wonwoo chastised him, not trying to single you out. His gaze flickered to you briefly. You gave him a small smile in thanks for trying with Jihoon. “It’s just a group project – let’s get this done, graduate, and get out of here.”

“How do you want to split up the work?” Jihoon ignored Wonwoo, asking the group instead. His eyes flashed down to his phone. “I gotta get to baseball practice soon, so hurry.”

“We can just switch every day in a pattern? Me for one night, Wonwoo for the next, then Jihoon?” you offered. “We don’t have to worry about the baby during the school day since Ms. Choi said we can return them to her room.”

It was a reasonable suggestion, but it still bothered Jihoon. 

“First of all,” Jihoon started, “It’s a doll, not a baby. Second, that’s dumb and inconvenient.”

You winced. Your patience was suddenly running thin. He didn’t like you, but did he have to be so crude? What the hell was his problem?

“I don’t think so,” Wonwoo frowned, also starting to get annoyed with how stubborn Jihoon was. 

Jihoon glared at Wonwoo – why was he suddenly siding with you? Did the shy anime-like boy have a crush on you?

“I’m busy,” Jihoon said as if it was obvious. “I have baseball practice nearly every day after school as we’re getting closer to the end of the season, which means sections? Competition is hot – I can’t be hauling that thing around the field.”

“Then you take it during the weekend,” you blurted, finally having enough of his crap. He was the one being unreasonable – as if you and Wonwoo weren’t busy either. 

“That’s not –”

“Isn’t it though?” you challenged. “If you’re too busy to do your part during the weekday, the weekend is the least you can do? Wonwoo and I can split the work during the week.”

“We have to spend time together too – as parents with the baby,” Wonwoo piped up, reminding the two of you about the other requirement he spotted. “At least once a week.”

Jihoon groaned, muttering a few curses underneath his breath. 

“Let’s just meet on Fridays then and use that time to discuss and gather info and do the reflection,” you suggested. 

“Why are you making all the scheduling decisions here?” Jihoon asked accusingly. “You’re not the only one here, Y/N. We have lives outside of school, you know? Fridays are usually baseball games for me.”

“Fine,” you relented, crossing your arms over your chest. “What do you propose?”

Jihoon mirrored your posture, leaning back into his seat. “There’s three of us and seven days of the week. One day, we’ll meet together, so that leaves six. You take the stupid doll for first two days, I’ll take him for next two days, and Wonwoo the other two.”

Your phone buzzed in your lap. 

Sooyoung: Where are you?

Sooyoung: Hyun is starting to wonder where you are – hurry!

You quickly shot your co-worker a text that you would be there soon and glanced up at Jihoon and Wonwoo who were still in discussion – though it was more of Jihoon talking at Wonwoo. 

“Two days for each person with a third for us to meet together sounds fine to me,” you announced when the chatter died down. You pointed towards the door, rising out of your seat. Your hand wrapped around the navy blue and yellow carseat, holding the infant. “I need to go – I’ll take the baby today and tomorrow, and hand it off to Wonwoo on Wednesday. Text me if you need anything.”

“‘I need to go’,” Jihoon mocked you. He scoffed and sank down into his seat. 

Wonwoo frowned. “Why do you dislike her so much?”

Through the convenience store's glass window, he watched you cross the empty street. Your ponytail swung back and forth behind you like a horse’s tail, the keychain of the white character with the glistening eyes and pink cap clipped to your black backpack mimicking the same motion. 

“I . . . don’t know,” Jihoon muttered. 

. . . .

“What if it’s because you’re jealous, my friend?” Soonyoung pointed his dripping cherry red popsicle at Jihoon. The sun was already setting after a long three hours of baseball practice. Rather than going home right away, Soonyoung somehow convinced Jihoon to go hang out at the park, where the latter ended up venting and recounting his day, updating his best friend on the situation with the FACS final project, finally ending with Wonwoo’s incredibly stupid question. 

“What? Am not,” Jihoon protested.

Soonyoung smirked, his tongue, a matching shade of red, flicking out to lip the droplet that was about to drip onto the pavement underneath the swings they were sitting on. “Are too – literally, you were top of the class since middle school until she came along and stole your thunder.”

“Impossible,” Jihoon refused to believe his best friend. 

“Justin Bieber said, ‘never say never,’” Soonyoung glanced over at Jihoon and nodded, knowingly. 

Jihoon refused to believe though – he knew himself best, right? And he knew he wasn’t the jealous type. He never cared about competition and winning. He was the type to just do his own thing, worked hard, and ended up at the top – until you, obviously. 

“Well, why else would you dislike her so much then?” Soonyoung probed. The last small chunk of cherry popsicle slipped off the stick and splattered on the blacktop underneath him. It melted quickly into a puddle on the hot surface.

“What if I don’t dislike her?” Jihoon proposed. 

Soonyoung gasped – Jihoon assumed it was just a delayed reaction from dropping the last of his frozen treat, but his next words took Jihoon by surprise. 

“Does this mean you like her?” Soonyoung asked, eyes wide. “You’re pulling a tsundere – like, like . . . Kyo Sohma from Fruit Basket or Tsukishima from Haikyuu!”

“What the – no!” Jihoon exclaimed. In his swing, he pulled away from his friend trying to loosen his grip on his arm. “That’s not what I meant, Soonyoung. I don’t like her, but I don’t dislike her – she’s just a person . . . who I find annoying.”

Soonyoung sat back down into his swing, letting out a brisk ‘tsk.’ He slumped his shoulders forward, his hands wrapping around the rusted chains. His lips placed in a pout, his eyes flickered quickly to Jihoon before they turned back to focus on the black top underneath them. “She’s not really though . . .?”

Jihoon’s face hardened, furrowing his brows together, narrowing his eyes at his best friend. What did Soonyoung know about you that Jihoon didn’t know?

Shifting uncomfortably under Jihoon’s intense glare, Soonyoung started pushing himself back and forth on the swing with the toe of his sneaker. “Y/N’s . . . She’s actually . . . uh, really nice? And helpful.” Soonyoung nodded, content with his description. 

“And I’m not?” Jihoon asked bluntly. 

Soonyoung pointed a finger at his friend. “I didn’t say that – see, you’re being jealous right now.”

Jihoon shook his head. “No, please – just enlighten me. What’s so nice and helpful about her?”

“One time, walking into school, I tripped and spilled my papers everywhere,” Soonyoung straightened his shoulders. “No one helped me pick up my stuff, but Y/N saw and helped, and asked if I was okay.”

How pathetic, Jihoon thought to himself. Soonyoung was such a soft person – so easy to please. 

“Soonyoung, that could’ve literally been anyone –”

“But no one helped me, did they?”

“It’s one incident.”

“She had chemistry with me that semester,” Soonyoung continued to explain, hoping Jihoon could see the better side of you. “I messed up my experiment and she stayed behind to help me.”

“Okay,” Jihoon tilted his head, “I guess that’s kind of nice.”

Soonyoung let a beat pass, carefully observing Jihoon’s reaction. 

“If you weren’t so peeved by her, I might’ve . . . tried to be her friend more,” Soonyoung sulked. 

“Are you blaming me, right now?” Jihoon asked in disbelief. 

“Yeah – a little bit. She’s cute.”

“Cute?” 

Soonyoung straightened his spine in the swing, refusing to look at Jihoon out of embarrassment – And Jihoon knew. Jihoon knew that sulking, childish look better than anyone. It was that look Soonyoung gave him when Jihoon made fun of him for being a SHINee fanboy when they first met. It was that look that Soonyoung gaven when Jihoon came to pick him up from detention their third year of high school and didn’t talk to him the whole bike ride home. It was that look Soonyoung gave when Jihoon didn’t pay enough attention to him and ignored Jihoon for a whole week. 

He was annoying, but Jihoon couldn’t help but cave in because that damned look made his heart ache a little. And as much as he hated to admit, high school was a little lonely when Soonyoung wasn’t around. Jihoon didn’t have that many friends, frankly. Taking in a deep breath with his eyes closed, knowing he had to calm down and approach this carefully before Soonyoung threw another fit. 

“D-do you . . . did you . . . like her?” Jihoon finally choked up. He side-eyed his best friend who was hiding his face in the shadow of his baseball cap. 

Eventually, Soonyoung gave a small nod that if Jihoon wasn’t watching him like a hawk, he would’ve missed it. 

“Fuck,” Jihoon whispered under his breath. “Do you still like her?”

“I dunno,” Soonyoung shrugged in defeat, “She’s cute and she was really nice, but I haven’t talked to her long enough to know.”

Pressing his lips into a tight line, Jihoon got up from his swing and awkwardly made his way over to Soonyoung. His hand hovering over his best friend’s shoulder, he hesitated for a moment, eventually clamping down. 

“There, there,” Jihoon muttered. 

“Give her a chance,” Soonyoung said after a moment, “For me?”

He peered up at Jihoon again – those damn shining eyes. 

“Fine.”

. . . .

So . . .

Maybe Soonyoung was right. 

You weren’t that bad. 

Most importantly, you did your part of the project and you did it well. Unlike most of his peers he had been in groups for projects, not only were you diligent, but you were thorough – even if it was just FACS class. You paid attention in class and took notes on how to care for infants. You studied them after class and put the skills you learned into use. He watched you swaddle Haeyoung, the name the three of you, mostly Wonwoo, decided to name the doll, with care and feed it the plastic bottle with white-colored fluid that didn’t come out of the rubber nipple as if it was your own child. You didn’t even grimace when you had to change its brown diaper (yes, this doll was programmed to poop – wild). When Wonwoo almost dropped it on its head, it was you who saved it and placed it properly back in his arms. You didn’t even get mad at Wonwoo as Jihoon almost did – you just . . . laughed and told him it was okay. 

You were never friendly with Jihoon as you were with Wonwoo, but at the very least, you were courteous and professional. That was enough for Jihoon. He wasn’t expecting the three of you to be best friends at the end of this project anyhow. The things the three of you decided to do was starting to become . . . fun – kind of. Jihoon wasn’t big on ‘going out,’ but morning walks in the park, afternoon coffee shop hangouts, and dinner at Wonwoo’s house were becoming bearable. Jihoon had always chalked this up to Wonwoo being present and serving as a buffer between you and Jihoon. However, one particular afternoon in which your third member couldn’t join the two of you, made Jihoon question the reality of your situation. 

Sitting in the uncomfortable wooden chair of the coffee shop, Jihoon played with the straw of his iced coffee, waiting for your arrival. He peered at his watch wondering where you were. It was almost 5PM – you had agreed to meet up half an hour ago. 

The bell hanging above the entrance of the cafe clanged as a new customer walked it. Shortly after your voice, a little breathless, called out to Jihoon from afar, “Hey!”

Jihoon looked up, tilting his chin in your direction as you made your way over to his table. You looked rather frazzled. Your hair was pulled up into a messy ponytail and you sported a white t-shirt with faint, but questionable splotches of yellow and brown. 

“Took you long enough,” Jihoon muttered. 

“Sorry for being late,” you cleared your throat, not hearing Jihoon’s snarky remark. You adjusted Haeyoung’s car seat in the chair next to you. “Um . . . family stuff came up.”

“Sure,” Jihoon replied. He leaned over, setting his elbows on the table. He watched you unzip your bag and pull out a red spiral notebook. Fringes from paper being ripped out of it stuck out on the edges. “Did you want anything to drink before we start?”

You stared at Jihoon blankly. You were thirsty admittedly, but you also knew you probably couldn’t afford anything here. Knowing your situation, Wonwoo had usually offered to buy you something, even if you refused. 

“No,” you shook your head and flipped open to a fresh page. 

“You sure? You don’t want to get your usual green tea latte?” He pointed at the cashier counter.

You froze in the middle of uncapping your blue pen. “H-how . . . how did you know that was my go-to order?”

Jihoon shrugged like it was no big-deal. “Wonwoo always buys it for you when we come here – and I remember you said once you don’t like caffeine.”

“Uh . . . I’m good – I don’t need any today,” you cleared your throat, positioning your pen over the blank piece of paper. “Let’s just get this over with and go.”

“Okay,” Jihoon replied, repositioning himself in his seat. No matter how hard he tried, however, he couldn’t shake off the weird turbulence swarming in his chest. 

. . . .

With some time before dinner, the two of you opted to walk around town with Haeyoung to make up for “family time” that your group didn’t spend last week. Indeed it was awkward, you were two enemies walking around with a fucking doll for heaven’s sake. However, it was oddly comforting walking around mindlessly without feeling the pressure to talk or listen constantly.

Unfortunately, his peace was interrupted sooner than expected. 

“So,” you started slowly, “What were you doing before the meeting today?”

Give her a chance.

Soonyoung’s word echoed in Jihoon’s head as he walked with you shoulder-to-shoulder.

“Just . . . some conditioning,” Jihoon grunted. 

Your eyes widened slightly. “For baseball?”

“Yeah,” Jihoon replied. He cleared his throat. 

“That’s . . . some intense training – no rest,” you commented. 

“If you want to be good, it’s what you gotta do.”

The conversation fizzled out pretty fast afterwards as neither of you were sure where to go from there. 

“How about you?” Jihoon managed to croak as the two of you crossed the street. He shoved his hands into his black joggers. 

“Hm?” you hummed in confusion. 

“W-what . . . where were you before the meeting,” Jihoon clarified, “You were . . . uh, late, you know?”

Annoyed that he had to bring that up, you side glanced at him before answering. “I was at work.”

Jihoon raised his brows in surprise. “Oh? You work.”

“Yeah,” you replied curtly. 

“Where at?” 

“M-my . . . older brother’s restaurant.”

“Your family owns a restaurant?”

You shook your head, swallowing your saliva nervously. “J-just . . . my brother.”

“Do your parents work there too?” Jihoon asked bluntly. Genuinely, he was confused. Assuming your older brother wasn’t that much older than you, most young adults didn’t have enough money to own a restaurant at this age. 

You stopped walking altogether, your chin dipping into your chest as your gaze fell onto the pavement before you. 

“Are you okay?” Jihoon asked curiously, dragging out each word. 

“I . . . don’t . . . my parents aren’t around anymore,” you finally answered him. 

Shit. 

“Oh,” Jihoon scratched the back of his head, “I-I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine,” you muttered immediately, “Don’t feel bad . . . they’ve been gone for a while – it’s w-whatever. I just . . . try to help out my brother when I can and he pays me some so I can . . . have money . . . for stuff.”

Jihoon let out a soft hum. His stomach flipped out of guilt. The two of you continued to walk in silence a little longer, the afternoon sun casting a shadow across town. It was almost supper time, most of the streets empty as people have lingered into nearby restaurants or driving home. The soft hum of engines sounded in the distance. Did Jihoon try to make conversation with you? Does he just keep walking in silence? If he talks to you, what does he talk about? Certainly not your parents. 

Thankfully, however, you seemed to answer his questions for him. 

“So . . . um, baseball,” you started, your grip tightened on the stroller. It was now Jihoon’s turn to side glance at you. “H-how’s the season going?”

“Good,” Jihoon replied simply, “Ish.”

“Ish?”

“I mean, it could be going better, but we’re working through it and nothing is set in stone yet.”

“What do you mean?”

“We had a fair amount of wins, but also losses,” Jihoon explained, “I’m . . . not sure if we’re going to make it to sections.”

“Um . . . what are . . . sections?” you asked stupidly. You didn’t play sports – not competitively at least. You didn’t have the time nor money for it. 

“They’re like . . . when you play against teams from different cities, not just other schools in your district,” Jihoon nodded, satisfied with his explanation, “So like . . . we played Bangtan High, but in sections, we might play a team from Anyang.”

“Oh,” you hummed, the pieces starting to come together. 

“You don’t play much sports, do you?” Jihoon found himself chuckling. 

You shook your head. 

Give her a chance. 

Soonyoung’s voice echoed in the back of his mind again. An idea started to form in Jihoon’s mind. You were making an effort to talk to Jihoon, perhaps not as friends, but . . . acquaintances – and perhaps this was a good chance for Soonyoung. Admittedly, Jihoon did feel bad for preventing him from being friends with people he wanted to be friends with. 

“You should come to one of my baseball games,” Jihoon suddenly offered. 

Heat traveled up your back and colored the tips of your ears. You felt warmth spread across your cheeks, immediately, tearing your gaze away from Jihoon. You thought he hated you; now, he was suddenly offering you to come to one of his games? 

He didn’t seem to notice, however, his mind still lingering on Soonyoung. 

“You should come,” Jihoon repeated himself, “The next one’s on Tuesday – I can get you a ticket. First experience on me.”

Jihoon turned to you, the corner of his lips twitching up ever so slightly. 

Jihoon was smiling at you. 

Lee Jihoon, your unintentional rival, your arch nemesis, was smiling. At. You.

When his single dimple on his left cheek peeked through, it sent your heart in a flutter. 

What the actual fuck was happening. 

. . . .

Soonyoung was ecstatic to see you. 

He was nearly bouncing off the walls of the dugout when he saw you in your bright blue t-shirt, sitting in the front stands. Typically, the boys weren’t allowed to leave the dugout before the game started, but a few members have already stalked off to the audience to greet their significant others. Since it was your first game and Soonyoung would not stop gushing about your presence, Jihoon decided to go greet you, indeed raising a few eyebrows. 

“Hey,” Jihoon called, catching your attention. He raised a hand to wave at you, Soonyoung trailing not too far behind. “You made it.”

You got up from your spot on the bleachers to meet him at the fence. With a nervous chuckle, you replied, “I did – didn’t want a free ticket to go to waste.”

“Where’s Haeyoung?” Jihoon asked. Typically, you took the doll on Mondays and Tuesdays. 

“I handed her off to Wonwoo,” you told him, “We traded days – figured a baseball game wasn’t quite the place for an infant.”

“Plastic infant,” Jihoon corrected. 

Surprisingly, a soft chortle escaped your lips. Prior, these kinds of comments annoyed you whenever Jihoon referred to Haeyoung as fake. 

“Hi Y/N!” Soonyoung interrupted. 

You turned to the excited and lanky boy. You smiled, “Soonyoung, right?”

“You remember!” the said man exclaimed. 

“Long time, no see,” you greeted him, “How have you been? You play?”

“I do,” Soonyoung replied, “And I’ve been doing pretty good.” He eyed Jihoon for a moment. “I heard you and Jihoon are working on a project together – I hope he’s not giving you too hard of a time.”

“Hey!” Jihoon protested. 

Your smile transformed into a grin as your gaze traveled down to your shoes. “He’s . . . quite alright actually.” You nodded. “He does his part.”

“I’m glad,” Soonyoung smiled. He stared at you a while longer. Though you didn’t seem to notice, Jihoon could’ve sworn there were stars shining in his eyes. 

“This is . . . my first baseball game,” you told the both of them shyly. 

“Oh?” Soonyoung replied in surprise. “Jihoon didn’t tell me that.”

Said boy grit his teeth and elbowed his friend in the ribs. “I . . . got her the ticket.”

“Oh?” Soonyoung said a little louder this time, surprise lacing his voice.  

“He did,” you confirmed nervously. You gripped the canvas strap of your satchel. 

“Boys!” their coach called. Jihoon looked back to see him gesturing for the ones at the stands to return. 

“Well,” Soonyoung shrugged, “Enjoy the game, Y/N – I’ll . . . see you later?”

Jihoon tugged at his elbow, carefully watching your reaction. Eyes wide, you blinked twice, a look of surprise gracing your face. He wasn’t sure if it was just the sun or if you were blushing at Soonyoung’s request.

“Uh . . . yeah,” you replied softly, “See you later.”

Soonyoung’s face immediately lit up, his lips curling into a pleased smile – the kind that caused his eyes to disappear. Jihoon and him jogged back to the dugout, though it was only Soonyoung who excitedly waved back at you. 

. . . .

“It’s a homerun! Kim Mingyu saved Sebong High with a winning homerun in the last minute!” the sports announcer exclaimed. The crowd around you erupted into a loud cheer as the ball soared out of the field. Boys dressed in white and blue streamed out of the dugout onto the fields, hugging the tall batter.

Never been at a baseball game before, you assumed it was a good thing. Awkwardly, you got up from your spot in the front and joined the crowd in standing, though you weren’t cheering – you weren’t the type to celebrate loudly.  Your eyes flickered at your classmates and a few parents hugging one another and jumping up and down, hard enough you could feel the vibrations through the metal bleachers. You were so lost, you failed to notice the enthusiastic player running in your direction. 

“Kwon Soonyoung!” you heard some girls nearby squeal. They rushed to the fence, grabbing on tightly to the black railing, waving at him. 

He didn’t pay any mind to them, however – his eyes were trained on you. 

“Y/N! Y/N! Hey!” he called, jumping up and down. The girls threw you a dirty look as you carefully made your down closer to him. 

“Congratulations,” you greeted him. 

“We won! We won!” he cried cheerfully. 

You let out a hearty laugh at his child-like excitement and nodded. 

When he calmed down, he smiled shyly and let out a sigh of relief. He took off his cap and placed it back on his head so it was backwards. “Hey, if you aren’t busy,” he looked back at the team, now throwing Mingyu up in the air, “We’re going out to pizza after if you want to join.”

The smile on your face fell. 

“Only if you’re comfortable though,” Sooyoung added, noticing your nervous expression. 

“I . . . uh, that’s sweet, Soonyoung, but I wouldn’t want to intrude,” you replied softly. 

“You won’t be!” Soonyoung protested, “The team members bring their significant others all the time.”

Your cheeks grew aflame immediately. 

“Not that we’re dating or I’m interested in you in that way or – err, I mean!” Soonyoung ran a frustrated hand over his face, “Uh . . . I mean, I am, but also . . . I just want to . . . it’s your first game and I wanted to invite you along – as a friend.”

“I . . . are you sure?” was all you could croak out at this time. 

“Yeah,” Soonyoung replied in a small voice. He pointed at a black-haired beauty in the crowd. “Jeonghan is Seungcheol’s friend and he tags along all the time – albeit, I’m not sure if it’s because he actually wants to hang out or he just wants free food.”

Being the weirdo who skipped a grade, you never quite fit in anywhere. You hardly had any friends your age because you didn’t have classes with them. The older kids you did have class with didn’t quite welcome you either. It was the first time anyone from school was asking you to hangout for fun and you did take the evening off from work to come to this – and Soonyoung mentioned free food?

“Please?” Soonyoung begged. “It’ll be fun.”

With your hands clasped in front of you, you sucked in a sharp breath and nodded. “Sure,” a nervous chortle escaped your lips, “Why not?”

. . . .

And that was how you found yourself wedged in between Jihoon and Soonyoung in a tight booth at the local pizza parlor. Nibbling on the tip of a slice of sausage pizza and your cheeks puffed and full, you while carefully the rest of the baseball team run loose. The boy that Soonyoung had pointed out to you earlier, Jeonghan, had challenged Mingyu to a pizza eating contest, the two disgustingly stuffing their faces. Seungcheol, the team captain, sat at the edge of the booth opposite to you, watching the two with an uncomfortable expression on his face – somewhere between a grimace and a grin. In the booth behind you, you could hear the younger members of the team, Chan and Seungkwan, bickering about whether or not frozen yogurt was the same thing as ice cream. 

“Sorry,” Jihoon grumbled next to you.

You gulped down the remnants of pizza in your mouth. “It’s fine.”

He slumped over, resting his head on his hands. “They’re . . . usually this loud. You get used to it.”

“Yeah?” you asked, dabbing the corner of your lips with a napkin. 

“But . . . it’s kind of fun, you know? To watch,” Jihoon continued to explain. “Are . . . you doing okay?”

You nodded while taking a sip of your Coke. Shyly, you tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear. Jihoon ignored the way his heart skipped a beat at the small gesture. “I’ve never been out like this before,” you admitted in a small voice. 

“Huh?” Jihoon got up from his position on the table, supporting his chin with his fist. 

“Yeah,” you drew your bottom lip in between your teeth. “I don’t really . . . ‘hang out’ with people from school.”

“Oh,” Jihoon frowned. “That sounds a little lonely.”

You shrugged as if it wasn’t a big deal. “You get used to it.”

“What do you like to do for fun then?” Jihoon inquired further.

You opened your mouth as if you were going to say something, but then closed it right away again. Peering down your half-eaten pizza, you curled your shoulders forward and trapped your hands in between your thighs, and muttered, “I don’t really do much outside of school and work to be honest.”

Jihoon remained silent for a moment. Before he could register the words that were coming out of his mouth, he asked, “You wanna watch a movie with Soonyoung and me this weekend?”

. . . .

For the next few weeks, you find yourself spending more time with Jihoon outside of your group project – the movie was just one of many hangouts to come. Typically, you spent your lunch hour by yourself, doing work in the library rather than in the crowded cafeteria with the few acquaintances you knew. It was quieter and it gave you a little extra time to study. It was also less claustrophobic, giving you more room to breathe and be comfortable, not always on guard. Before you knew it, however, according to Jihoon at least, upon Soonyoung’s insistence, the pair of friends started joining you in the library for lunch. It was certainly weird at first because you weren’t used to someone talking to you so much, but you grew accustomed to their company. Listening to Soonyoung babble was fun and admittedly, his banter with Jihoon every now and then was entertaining. Through these talks, you found out Soonyoung lived only a block away from you, and Jihoon a few blocks away from Soonyoung. You never thought you would be one of those girls, but you found yourself bathing underneath the spring afternoon sun on the white bleachers at the baseball field, waiting for them to finish practice to walk home together. Indeed, the many admirers who came to watch them regularly eyed you curiously, but you pretended not to mind, opting to read your textbooks or work on the calculus homework instead, while they did their thing. Truthfully, you still didn’t quite understand the game despite the number of times Jihoon tried to explain it to you. 

Sitting in the library in the early morning, earbuds plugged into your MP3 (yes, you still had one of those), trying (key word, trying), to revise your final paper for your modern literature class, you wondered how the last few weeks of high school came down to this: Hanging out with your high school rival and his best friend. At this point, were the three of you acquaintances? Friends? Gripping the red pen in your hand, you shook your head of such thoughts, reminding yourself to focus on the missing commas in the paper in your hands. Suddenly, sweet guitar strings started playing through your earbuds, Justin Bieber’s voice coming through, “One touch and you got me stoned, higher than I’ve known . . .” 

You smiled softly to yourself, biting the inside of your cheek at the sound of the song. It was yet another change you weren’t expecting: You actually liked Justin Bieber’s music now because of Jihoon. Had it been just a month from now, you would’ve rather eaten bricks than listen to his music. The memories of the walk home when Jihoon introduced you to the artist trickled into your mind. 

“What do you mean you don’t like Justin Bieber?!” Jihoon exclaimed. Immediately, his hand already flew to his back pocket, searching for his phone. 

“Here he goes again,” Soonyoung chuckled. 

“C’mon,” you rolled your eyes, “The last time I listened to him, the lyrics of Baby weren’t that deep.”

“He’s evolved – grown,” Jihoon defended childishly. His eyes were glued to his phone, scrolling through his Dotify playlist. “And admit, as terrible as the lyrics were, Baby was legendary.”

“He’s a big fan,” Soonyoung leaned over and whispered. You nodded in acknowledgement. 

Jihoon paused in his stride and unzipped a side pocket of his bag, digging for his earbuds. Pulling out a tangle of white wires, he ran his hand through a loop and straightened it, plugging one end into the audio port of his phone. Placing one bud in his ear, he offered you the other side. 

“Here,” Jihoon insisted. 

“I don’t think you’re gonna–”

“Just listen!” he protested, already trying to shove the piece in your ear. 

“Okay! Okay!” you giggled. You adjusted it and crossed your arms, waiting for him to hit play. 

The look on your face was priceless. You winced back in surprise, the devilish grin wiped off your face. You had stopped walking altogether, Jihoon and Soonyoung watching you curiously. 

“It’s good, isn’t it?” Jihoon sniggered. 

You nodded slowly. “He’s definitely . . . grown since Baby.”

Jihoon rolled his eyes. “Admit it! It’s good!”

You shrugged and handed the earbud back to Jihoon. “It’s not what I expected from Justin Bieber, but yeah –”

“Sucker!” Jihoon screeched gleefully. 

The memory was interrupted with the loud plop of a plastic cup in front of you. Green liquid filled the clear container, condensation forming droplets on the outside,  the clinking of ice sloshing against one another seeping through your headphones. You looked up to see Jihoon waving at you. 

“Ice green tea latte with oatmilk because you’re lactose intolerant – just like you like it,” Jihoon announced when you pulled out your earpiece. 

Hesitantly, you reached for the cold drink and brought the straw to your lips. You peered up at him through your lashes. “T-thanks.”

He pulled out the wooden chair across from you and collapsed into it with a loud groan. “You’re welcome. I figured you might need it,” he pointed at the paper, “You said you were still working on the paper when I texted you last night at 11.”

The heat that creeped up your spine came faster than you could register. Had it been anyone else, you might have not thought much of it, but this was coming from Jihoon. He remembered you were working on your paper, remembered your drink of choice, and bought it for you knowing you would be tired. It was Jihoon. You shouldn’t be this flustered. 

“Thanks,” was all you could muster to say again. 

Jihoon nodded and reached for your MP3. Eyes wide, you lunged for it, but he snatched it before you could get to it. A smirk spread across his lips. 

“Justin Bieber, I see?” he teased. 

“Shut up,” you mumbled, ripping the device out of his hands. 

“I’m culturing you, Y/N,” he sang. 

“It’s one good song,” you retorted, “Does not mean I like Justin Bieber as a person.”

“Didn’t ask you to,” Jihoon shrugged, “He just has nice music.”

“You just like sad boy music,” you shot back. 

“And if I do?”

“What are you doing here, Jihoon?” you asked, starting to get annoyed by his presence. 

“Oh right,” Jihoon sat up in his chair, “Soonyoung was wondering if you wanted to come to the baseball game on Friday.”

“Oh?” you perked up, setting your drink on the table, “I was planning on it anyhow.”

Jihoon held up his finger. He ignored the nagging voice at the back of his head telling him to do something different than Soonyoung asked. “It’s the last game before sections.”

“Sections . . . playing other cities?”

Jihoon nodded. “Which means it’s an important game.”

“Okay,” you dragged out the last syllable, not sure what he was getting at. 

The boy shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “It’s tradition to ask someone special to wear their jersey to the last game.”

Your mouth fell agape slightly, the heat returning to your face. 

“Soonyoung,” Jihoon continued slowly, carefully observing your reaction, “S-soonyoung wants you to wear his jersey.”

When you awkwardly agreed, Jihoon couldn’t help the way his heart dropped to the pits of stomach. 

He was supposed to dislike you, not feel like this. 

. . . .

And that was how you found yourself standing at the front of the bleachers wearing Soonyoung’s jersey, his last name printed in large white block letters, ‘KWON’ and the number ‘05’, on the back. You tucked it into a pair of jean shorts, a matching blue cap covering your face upon your co-worker and friend, Sooyoung’s insistence. She had also tagged along for today’s game. 

“You look cute,” Sooyoung commented, holding onto the railing. 

You tugged at the front of the jersey. “Thank you.”

She linked arms with you. “Don’t be so nervous.”

You couldn’t help but be with all the fans staring holes into the back of your head sitting behind you. “I-I’m just . . . not used to this.”

“Soonyoung asked you to wear it for a reason,” she reassured you, “Wear it proudly.”

“Sooyoung,” you started slowly, “W-why did he ask me to wear it though? And . . . not Jihoon.”

A look of surprise crossed her face. “Wait –”

“Y/N!” Soonyoung’s cheerful voice cut off your friend. 

You both turned your attention to the tall boy running and waving your way, this time Jihoon trailing behind him. You and Sooyoung clambered down to the black railing. 

“Soonyoung,” greeted him softly. You gestured to your friend next to you, “This is my friend Sooyoung – she goes to a different high school, but wanted to tag along today.”

Sooyoung waved cheerfully at the pair of friends who returned the gesture. Soonyoung let out a small chuckle. “Wah, our names are almost the same – different by one letter.”

“No shit, Sherlock,” Jihoon snorted. 

Sooyoung frowned at the shorter boy. 

Nevertheless, A satisfied smile graced Soonyoung’s face. “You look nice.” He was looking at you.

“Thank you for letting me wear your jersey,” you told him. Your eyes flickered momentarily to Jihoon who was standing silently behind Soonyoung. He paid no mind to you whatsoever, looking off in the distance, perhaps at the score sign. 

“Thank you for wearing it,” Soonyoung replied. “To be honest? I was kind of worried you wouldn’t.”

You knitted your brows together. “Why wouldn’t I?”

Rubbing the back of his neck, Soonyoung let out a nervous chortle and looked away. “Y/N . . .”

“Let’s go back,” Jihoon grumbled, tugging at Soonyoung’s arm. The latter frowned, but Jihoon returned it with a stern look. “Focus on the game, Kwon.”

Soonyoung turned back to you momentarily. “I’ll see you – y-you guys after the game?”

You nodded. 

“Win or lose, pizzas on us,” Soonyoung smiled. 

“Good luck,” you told them, though Jihoon didn’t seem to acknowledge you. 

When they stalked off, your friend turned to you, her eyes wide as if she was about to explode. 

“What?” you asked dumbly. 

“You seriously don’t know why he asked you to wear his jersey?” Sooyoung deadpanned. 

You shook your head slowly. 

Sooyoung collapsed into your side, burying her face into your chest. “Oh you, sweet summer’s child.”

. . . .

It had been a week since the baseball game and a week before graduation. 

Since then, Jihoon has been extra bitter around you. He was curt and short with answers. When you asked him to study together for other classes, he was quick to turn you down, explaining that he had to practice even more for sections. You had chalked it up to him just being stressed with baseball and the end of the year coming up, but you couldn’t help but he was avoiding you. Thus, you did what any rational, young adult would do: you confronted him. 

Jihoon had invited you and Wonwoo over to finish up the reflection for FACS class. Wonwoo had curfew and headed home early. He had left Haeyoung behind with the two of you since it was Jihoon’s to take the doll anyhow. Seated at his desk, Jihoon was bent over his phone tapping away at a game of SUPERSTAR Pledis. 

“Hey,” you called, pushing yourself from your lying position on his bed. 

Jihoon let out a nonchalant hum. 

“Are you . . . mad at me?” you asked. 

Jihoon paused his game and let out a scoff. He spun around in his desk chair, irritated. “Not everything’s about you, Y/N.”

You frowned. “Excuse me?”

“I’m not mad at you,” Jihoon continued with a roll of his eyes, “Why would I be?”

You shrugged. “You’ve just . . . been kind of distant.”

“Maybe because I have other things to do that don’t involve you?” 

That’s when the mechanical cry of Haeyoung started to sound. 

“Look what you did,” Jihoon grumbled. Using the toe of his sock-covered foot, he reached over and began rocking the car seat. 

You couldn’t give a damn about the doll at this moment, absolutely taken aback by Jihoon’s rudeness. “That was uncalled for . . . Look, I don’t know what happened or what I did, but if you could just, I don’t know, be mature, and tell me, maybe we can talk it out and work it out? You’ve been upset since the baseball game and I’m just trying to understand why. I thought maybe it was the end of the year coming up, but that clearly doesn’t seem to be the case.”

Despite the doll’s cries, Jihoon stopped rocking the car seat and turned to you. “Mature? I’m older than you, Y/N. What do you even know about me?”

“Does that matter when you’re acting like a child?” you exclaimed. 

“Do you always have to be better than me?” Jihoon exploded. He stood up from his chair, unable to contain his discontent anymore. Truthfully, he knew you were right about him being cold towards you, but it had nothing to do with you and everything to do with him. 

He didn’t realize it then, but the more he dwelled on it, Jihoon was jealous. And what made it worse was that he wasn’t just jealous of you this time, but he was jealous of his best friend, Soonyoung, when that should’ve never been the case. As much as he wanted to deny it, Jihoon had feelings for you and he was sure Soonyoung did too – he wouldn’t have just thoughtlessly asked you to wear his jersey at the last game. It was a tradition reserved for couples, or couples who were to be. Unlike Soonyoung, Jihoon didn’t have the guts to ask you to wear his jersey, and when he finally did, it was already too late. He was always like this: one step behind in everything he wanted, you included. 

“Y/N wins this, Y/N got the highest score that,” Jihoon mocked, continuing out of fury, “You’re so irritating, you know that? Ever since you joined our class, you know how annoying it has been trying to compete with you? I tried to keep my distance, but you slowly started seeping into my life with this project – fuck, even my best friend is whipped about youn now. What’s so great about you, anyways?”

You shrank back in his bed as each and every word pierced you. You had thought just maybe high school wouldn’t end so terribly after all. These past few weeks with Jihoon and Soonyoung were fun. Even if it was fleeting, for once, you had friends: People who get you and enjoy your company. But alas, you were wrong; everyone was the same. Like you feared, you got too attached to what was a façade, trusted too much, and got hurt. 

“Do you really think I enjoy being in this . . . this made-up competition with you?” you started. Standing in the middle of his room, you clenched and unclenched your fist, boring holes into Jihoon’s forehead as he leaned awkwardly against his wooden desk with his arms crossed over his chest, one hand clutching the elbow. His narrow eyes watched you carefully, his expression was blank and unreadable, as it always has been. 

Only then did Jihoon finally notice that Haeyoung had finally quieted. It was quite ironic. The silence was all the two of you desired after hours of the stupid doll child crying, yet it made the air thick and suffocating.   There was no hint of relief or relaxation like he had imagined - the tension was like a rubber band pulled taught on the verge of snapping to its separate ends. All the words he wanted to tell you at the tip of his tongue had evaporated into thin air. He didn’t have to be told to know he really went too far this time. 

Your lips crumpled into a bunch, your chin wrinkling in the process. Jihoon was truly frustrating. A man of few words, holder of the best poker face you’ve seen, he hid his heart hidden in the depths of school uniform. You tried to be understanding - not everyone was as honest about their feelings as you. It didn’t mean he made you any less upset, however. All you wanted was him to communicate with you clearly. You just wanted one word from him. You just wanted him to answer your question. One minute his actions were pulling at your heartstrings, the next he was throwing you under the bus to be rolled over. Perhaps you didn’t know him as well as he had led on. 

One flutter of your lashes and the first tear escaped your lower lid and rolled down your cheek. You let out a small cough to hide the whimper in your throat. You’ve had enough. You couldn’t do this anymore.  

“I’m done, Jihoon,” you relented, your voice barely above a whisper. “When this assignment is over tomorrow and after we graduate this weekend,” you sucked in a sharp breath, “I hope we never meet again.”

Jihoon had half-expected you to storm out of his room in a dramatic fashion. Instead, you silently dug into your bookbag and fished out a clear plastic case covered in blue and pink stickers, ‘Jihoon’s Sad Boy Mixtape’ written in bold black marker across the front. His heart sank as you dropped the cassette onto his navy blue sheets and turned your back to him.

Your hand rested on the cool stainless steel door. You pulled it open a crack before you paused. You knew it was unrealistic, but you had a sliver of hope he would come after you. Yet Jihoon stayed put by his desk. Alas, it was only a moment for the films. 

“Goodbye, Jihoon,” you said. 

The shake in your voice was the last straw for him, but Jihoon was too late. As he lunged after you, hand outreached, you stepped out of his room. He could hear your footsteps rushing down the hall, then slapping down the stairs of his home. 

Jihoon was always one step behind you. 

Today, he was one hundred steps behind. 

. . . .

Graduation was anything but fun. 

Standing out in the overgrown grass of the football field, the blades tinkling their ankles, with the sun beating down on them in their black gowns absorbing every ounce of heat – it was unbearable. Yet, for Jihoon, it was worse with you sitting next to him throughout the whole ceremony, not a single word falling from your lips. Your expression was unreadable: From the principal’s introduction to the class president’s fruity speech to tossing your caps in the air. At the end of it all, you silently left in search of your brother while all your classmates cheered and hugged. 

Jihoon knew better than to chase after you today, but he did anyway. He wanted to make things right – he couldn’t bear the thought of you having a grudge against him moving into the next chapter of your lives. His hand wrapped tightly around your wrist just as you neared the parking lot, Jihoon jerked your back. 

“Hey,” he greeted you. 

Your gaze only hardened, though you didn’t fight back. 

“C-can we talk?” Jihoon asked.  

“I can’t imagine what you have to say to me, Jihoon,” you said coldly. 

He didn’t either. He didn’t prepare for this, but here he was. 

“I’m . . . sorry,” Jihoon muttered. His eyes dropped to the asphalt burning under his leather shoes. “I shouldn’t have said all those horrible things to you – y-you’re . . . my friend, b-but . . .” He let out a frustrated sigh, unable to say what was on the tip of his tongue.

I like you.

It wouldn't make sense to tell you - at least not now after he told you you were annoying.

Your heart sank. As much as you wanted to forgive him then and there, your desire to save yourself from the pain of disappointment was greater. You cleared your throat and pulled your hand from his grasp. Jihoon peered up at you, melancholy clouding his eyes. 

“Congratulations, Jihoon,” you said, you pressed your lips into a tightline and looked away briefly. You saw Sooyoung and your older brother searching for you in the distance. “Good luck in college – I’m sure you’ll do great.”

Those were your last words before you walked out of Jihoon’s life. 

. . . .

Or so he thought. 

College was never a topic that either of you discussed, choosing to talk about lighter things from complaining about your math teacher to the kind of music you liked to listen to. Jihoon did not expect to see you here in the flesh, standing in front of the university student union, let alone holding hands with Wonwoo. 

“W-what are you guys doing here?” Jihoon stuttered, unable to keep his eyes off your intertwined fingers. He noticed the way you adjusted your hand to hold Wonwoo tighter. When did this happen? You and Wonwoo didn't even seem close when you did the project together. Were you friends with benefits? Dating? For how long? So many questions ran through Jihoon's mind.

“Jihoon - hey,” Wonwoo started. He tucked his free hand into the pockets of his jeans. Briefly, Wonwoo’s eyes flickered to you as if to silently ask if you were doing okay. “You go here too?”

Jihoon nodded, his eyes traveling up to your face. Though, you refused to meet his gaze, opting to stare at the pavement instead. “I do . . . uh, aerospace engineering major . . .”

Wonwoo’s eyes widened in surprise. He pointed at you. “Y/N is too.”

You already knew. You just decided to keep your distance, in hopes you could go through college without having to interact with him. That would not be the case as fate would have it. 

“Hi,” Jihoon raised his hand slowly to greet you. The corner of his lips twitched up into an awkward smile – that damned dimple on his left cheek that made your heart flutter all those months ago made an appearance, still sending your heart surging through your chest. “It’s been a while.”

Instinctively, you inched closer to Wonwoo before replying to him. “Yeah – long time, no see.”

Silence, then a beat. 

Wonwoo cleared his throat. “Uh, well, we’ll see you around then, Jihoon? We have a class soon.”

“Course,” Jihoon replied softly. Wonwoo waved 'goodbye,' while you quickly jogged to his side. A pang shot through his chest as he let out a heavy sigh.

“See you around . . . Y/N.”

Five Moments in Time

Pairing: 40s!Bucky x Nurse!Reader

Summary: All of the moments in which Sergeant Barnes let the nurse on his unit know he’s not gonna stop trying to win her over. Even from beyond the grave.

Word count: 4.5k

Warnings: Minor injury, angst (the big kind)

a/n: I rewatched tfa and fell in love with Bucky all over again! So I had to write some 40s angst of course. Also I think might’ve made myself cry. 

I discontinued my taglist, but you can follow my library blog @pellucid-library​ for notifications 🤍

Masterlist

“And just who are you?” 

The medical tent was overrun with white-clad bodies in a flurry. Aprons were stained and gauze was clenched tightly between overworked fingers. The war hadn’t been kind, but at least Captain Rogers had been able to save all these men. 

And amongst the men was the flirty, ever charming, Bucky Barnes. 

“I’ve told you, Sergeant Barnes, I’m your nurse. Now please sit back so I can properly stitch your arm.” 

He didn’t listen to you, sitting up further to prop his hand on his chin and take you in. You’d asked him about four times now, each one fruitless. 

Keep reading

For the Love of the Game - Masterlist

Pairing: College Athlete!Bucky x Reader 

Summary: Bucky Barnes was a menace. NYU’s top baseball player, he was used to girls falling at his feet and could smooth talk his way out of just about anything. You hated him. He couldn’t figure out why. So when the novelty of weekend parties and quick hookups finally wore off—and his feelings for you began to grow—he made it his mission to fix it. 

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol/drinking, Mild language, Angst, Minor injury, Smut (Minors dni, marked with **), Enemies to lovers trope!

a/n: This series is now complete :)

✶ Part One ✶ 

✶ Part Two ✶ 

✶ Part Three ✶

✶ Part Four ✶ 

✶ Part Five ✶ 

✶ Part Six ✶ 

✶ Part Seven ✶ 

Drabbles/One-shots (chronological after the main series, excluding the prequel) 

Bucky realizing he’s falling in love. Prequel one-shot.

First time**

The fight

Bucky gets injured during a game  

Going pro

What You’ve Got

In seven years

💙⚾️Playlist by @buckystarlight​​

to my youth | masterlist

ミ☆ seventeen social media au 

        ミ☆ a love alarm inspired au

ミ★ synopsis: in a world where everyone finds out who loves them within a 10 meter radius through the app love alarm, confessing your feelings without the use of the app is no longer considered normal. however, you refuse to download it in hopes that you’ll be able to fall in love without being dependent on love alarm.

ミ★ genre: slice of life!au, fluff, humor, angst

ミ★ pairings: wonwoo x female reader

ミ★ start: dec. 29, 2020        ミ★ end: mar. 14, 2021

Keep reading

your girlfriend

pairing: scoups x f!reader, jeonghan x reader

word count: 2.2k

contains: threesome, fingering, intercourse (protected), masturbation (m), cum-tasting (it's brief; i'm so sorry), reader gets leg cramps

a/n: hahahahahahaha. this is so soft for a threesome, i truly indulged myself. tagging @husbandcheol for cheol feels. thanks @underratedlovedone for proofreading! hi @starlightjoong!

"you're doing it wrong"

jeonghan opens his mouth to respond to seungcheol's grumbling, quickly closing it when he sees your boyfriend slide out from behind you. seungcheol nudges him away, taking his place in front of you and massaging your calf.

when seungcheol and you had discussed the idea of bringing someone else into your bedroom for one night, you didn't think it would come to any fruition. your boyfriend gets sulky when you give anyone (even a dog) more attention than him - you had no reason to think he'd be okay with inviting a third person to participate in your activities. it seems that his friend jeonghan is an exception to that.

you were surprised by the offer but readily agreed, trusting both men fully. boundaries were drawn soon enough - the big one being that jeonghan keep his dick in his pants (something you had apologized for, but he had waved it away with a smile, saying he was just happy to be there).

everything was going fantastic until a few minutes ago. jeonghan was much softer than you would've expected, working three fingers into you to get you ready for your boyfriend's cock. it was quite the experience - sitting on the edge of the bed between seungcheol's legs while he pressed soft kisses on your neck, his praises mixing with his friend's.

then your penchant for getting leg cramps during sex bubbled up, and both men froze as your moans turned to yelps. "cramp", you had gritted out, leading your boyfriend to instruct an alarmed jeonghan to massage your calf. it seems jeonghan wasn't doing a good enough job, and seungcheol had now taken over.

"i was doing fine, you know", jeonghan mutters, side-eyeing seungcheol.

"you were too slow", seungcheol doesn't bother looking up, his eyes focused on your face as his fingers work on your muscles, "she's in pain, jeonghan".

"obviously you're faster, you're used to her", jeonghan rolls his eyes, looking at you and adding apologetically, "i'm sorry, angel. i tried".

"it's okay, hannie", you giggle, and his face lights up at the sound, "sorry about - well, this. not exactly what you signed up for".

jeonghan shakes his head and murmurs "it's not a problem" the same time seungcheol looks up and chides "do not apologize, baby", and you can't help but snicker at the situation. you're naked and extremely turned on while both jeonghan and seungcheol are shirtless, and you're all waiting for your stupid cramp to go away.

oh well. atleast jeonghan will remember the night.

"can i kiss you, angel?", jeonghan asks tentatively.

you look to your boyfriend and catch his wink. i'm okay with this if you are, it says.

"yeah", you smile, watching as he picks up your hand in response. he trails soft kisses up your arm to your neck, intertwining his fingers with yours. ever the flirt.

"you're so pretty, angel", he kisses the corner of your mouth, and you can't help but blush under his attention.

"thought you were going to kiss her, jeonghan. not fall in love with her", seungcheol's voice interrupts the tender moment, and you look to your boyfriend to see him shaking his head fondly.

"so i did", jeonghan whispers over you lips, "and i would hate to keep you waiting, angel".

unlike your boyfriend, jeonghan kisses you slowly, teasingly. his tongue fleetingly touches your lips but doesn't go past them, his free hand coming up to touch the side of your neck lightly. the whole thing is a ploy to make you want more, and you do - finally snapping and pulling his head closer, swallowing the triumph chuckle that falls from his lips. you're almost completely immersed in the kiss, and you almost don't notice how your boyfriend's hands have stopped moving on your leg. almost.

"that was nice", jeonghan pulls back and chuckles, lifting your intertwined hands to place a soft kiss on your knuckles.

"yeah", you clear your throat, "nice".

"if the two of you have had your fun", seungcheol grumbles, making you look at him, "is there still pain, baby?"

"no", you move your leg to check, "no, it's fine now".

"okay", he looks at his friend, "jeonghan, hold her from behind".

jeonghan looks like he wants to protest for a second, but he follows - smoothly sliding behind you and wrapping his arms around your body. seungcheol moves to kiss you, his lips hard on yours as his hands weave into your hair, the feeling of his tongue on yours making you moan into the kiss.

"am i better?", he asks after pulling away, bringing you out of your haze.

"huh?", you blink, barely catching jeonghan whisper "seriously?" against your neck.

"that's my girl", your boyfriend smirks, moving to separate your thighs.

"she has to say that, she's your girlfriend", jeonghan nips at your ear, "don't worry, angel. i know who you like better".

"jeonghan", seungcheol chides, inching a hand towards your cunt, "keep her still".

the arms around you tighten as your boyfriend's finger touches your clit, rubbing light circles while his other arm keeps your thigh still. your moans are spurred on by jeonghan's praises in your ear, his hands moving to play with your nipples.

"she likes them pinched", seungcheol offers, his finger now circling your entrance.

"is that so?", jeonghan tugs at your nipples before pinching them lightly, "you like a bit of pain, angel?"

you whine a "yes", your head tipping back to rest against jeonghan's shoulder just as your boyfriend pushes in two fingers in your cunt. they curve in practiced come-hither motions, easily finding the sensitive spot inside you.

"do you like his fingers inside you, angel?", jeonghan asks teasingly, his fingers still on your breasts.

"he asked you a question, baby", seungcheol pipes in when you don't respond, a finger coming to circle your clit, "answer him, or i'll stop".

"yes", you gasp, feeling your orgasm approaching, "yes. please - cheoli - please - "

"come, baby", your boyfriend orders, "now".

you explode, trembling in jeonghan's arms as seungcheol's fingers help you ride out your high. your body goes lax against jeonghan's when you come down, and you shiver when he whispers "so good, angel. so good" in your ear. you watch from lidded eyes as seungcheol pulls out his fingers from you cunt, the digits glistening with your slick.

"want a taste?", his eyes meet his friend's.

jeonghan doesn't answer, choosing to lean forward as seungcheol brings his fingers to the former's mouth. you meet seungcheol's eyes as the sound of jeonghan sucking your slick fills the room, and an involuntary whimper escapes your lips.

"you like that, baby?", seungcheol's wet fingers touch your cheek, "how does she taste, jeonghan?"

"just decadent", jeonghan hums against your skin, "he's so lucky, angel. he gets to taste you whenever he wants".

"yes, i am", seungcheol presses a soft kiss on your lips, "very lucky. baby, do you want to stop now? what do you want to do?"

"want you to fuck me while hannie watches", you answer without hesitation, "if he's okay with it", you add softly.

"oh, i'm more than okay with it", jeonghan responds.

"it's decided, then", seungcheol pulls at the drawstrings on his sweatpants, "jeonghan, back up against the headboard. same position, hold her still".

jeonghan follows the order, coaxing you to move with him. his arms wrap around you while you spread your legs, watching as your boyfriend takes off his remaining clothes and grabs a condom from the nightstand. "good to know you kids are using protection", jeonghan comments, making you giggle as seungcheol rolls his eyes.

"i know he's big, angel", jeonghan comments as the two of you watch seungcheol roll on the latex, "but incase you want to try someone longer - "

"jeonghan", seungcheol growls.

"hey, i mean no harm", jeonghan's voice is conciliatory, but you can hear his smile, "just letting her know she has options".

seungcheol closes his eyes and swears, seemingly searching for patience.

"don't let him bother you, cheoli", you murmur soothingly, reaching for your boyfriend's hand, "and you", you turn to look at jeonghan, "stop poking him".

"but it's so fun", he protests, taking in your narrowed eyes, "fine, fine. i'll stop bothering your cheoli".

"will you please fuck me now?", you turn and pout at seungcheol, watching as his eyes soften, "please?"

"ofcourse, baby", his hands caress your thighs before lifting them up, exposing your cunt, "feeling empty, mm?"

"yeah", you whimper when he slaps his cock against your cunt, feeling your blood rush at jeonghan's low curses, "cheol - please".

"take a deep breath, baby", he positions the head against your entrance, "jeonghan?"

"i know", the arms around you tighten.

you moan as seungcheol pushes his cock into you slowly, his eyes on your face to look for any signs of discomfort. you feel jeonghan press soft kisses on the side of your head as you close your eyes and try to get used to the stretch, clenching around seungcheol's cock at the praises both men murmur at you.

"i'm good now", you breathe, "you can move. please".

seungcheol pecks your lips softly before pulling out and thrusting back in, both of you moaning at the sensation. he fucks into you at a frustratingly slow speed, not giving into your pleas.

"he's a tease, isn't he?", jeonghan's voice is slightly uneven, his cock digging against your back, "if it was me, i would give you whatever you wanted, angel".

seungcheol thrusts in sharply, increasing his speed suddenly like you've been begging him to. maybe you should invite jeonghan more often.

"yeah, it's not you, jeonghan", he keeps up the speed, groaning through his retort, "it's me. isn't that right baby?"

you mewl at his possessive words, whining his name when he brings a finger to your clit.

"answer him, angel", jeonghan murmurs, pinching your nipples.

"yes - ah”, your eyes roll back as seungcheol's fingers quicken, your high approaching at the assault, "yours, cheoli. just - yours - please - "

"wanna come, baby?", your boyfriend grunts, "go ahead. milk my cock".

his words are enough to make you fall off the edge and you explode around his cock, watching as he thrusts in a few more times before his hips stutter, a long-drawn moan escaping his lips. your hands rest on his skin as you lean against jeonghan, your pants filling up the room.

"well, that was something", jeonghan breaks the silence, leading you and seungcheol to chuckle.

"told you, you won't regret it", your boyfriend gives you a brief kiss before getting up to discard the condom, while jeonghan slides from behind you to grab the bottle of water from the nightstand, handing it to you with a small smile.

"how you feeling, baby?", seungcheol wraps his arms around you, accepting the bottle from your hand, "you okay?"

"yeah", you look at jeonghan, who is scrolling through his phone, pointedly ignoring the two of you.

"what is it?", seungcheol whispers in your ear.

"cheoli", you whisper back, "he didn't come. look, he's hard".

"i see", he hums contemplatively, "you want him to, baby? i don't mind. you wanna ask him?"

"okay", you murmur.

"hannie", the man in question looks up with a smile, and you feel suddenly shy under his gaze, "want you to feel good too".

"i'm okay, angel", he soothes, "i had fun".

"she means she wants to see you jerk off", seungcheol supplies helpfully, grinning when you whine at his phrasing, "i said i'm fine with it, as long as you are".

"oh", an uncharacteristic blush adorns jeonghan's cheeks, "well. if that's what you want, angel".

seungcheol holds you from behind while moving you to face jeonghan, watching as he takes out his cock and runs his fingers on it slowly, closing his eyes and swearing softly.

he was right, you can't help but think, he's longer.

you look down when you feel strong hands pushing your thighs apart, whimpering when seungcheol runs his fingers lightly up your cunt.

"i know, baby. i know", he whispers when you whine, "let's give jeonghan something to look at, mm? see how much he likes it, mm?"

you clench when you catch jeonghan's reverent expression, his eyes fixed on your cunt while he thrusts his cock into his hand.

"you like how he looks, baby?", your boyfriend coos in your ear, his finger on your clit getting you closer to the edge, "tell him, baby. tell him he looks pretty".

"so pretty", you whine, feeling your third orgasm closing in, unable to look away from jeonghan's cock, "you're so pretty, hannie".

"fuck", jeonghan's hand stutters as he comes, and the visual is enough to set off your own orgasm. one of seungcheol's arms keeps you in place while the other helps you ride out your high, his lips whispering praises in your ear while jeonghan watches with lidded eyes.

"wanna have a taste?", jeonghan asks after both of you have calmed down a little, holding out his cum-covered hand.

"just this once", seungcheol sighs when you look to him.

you take the offered fingers in your mouth and grimace at the bitter taste. you've never been fond of the taste of a semen, but you've gotten somewhat used to your boyfriend's.

"aughhh", you groan, closing your eyes out of exhaustion, "you taste better, cheoli".

a sleepy smile slips on your face when jeonghan's indignant voice exclaims "she has to say that, she's your girlfriend!"

Seventeen Smau Fics Recs

scoups :

the secret of us by @jeonjaemark

game day by @escapewriter

the kids are going to be alright by @wondernus

midnight train by @svtfilms

first to fall by @thepixelelf

yoon jeonghan :

pillow talk by @goingneo

iris beauty by @wonunuu

death by a thousand cuts by @ssssssssssssscoups

let's love by @shuajeong

promise by @haosvteen

came down from heaven by @hannie-dul-set

hong joshua :

you were beautiful by @viastro

starstruck! by @cupidhaos

little secret by @haosvteen

falling for you by @memesolvernonchwe

hoshi :

let me hear you say by @cherrycheolliesc

love hard by @wondernus

jeon wonwoo :

to my youth by @viastro

bittersweet by @networkluvs

curious cat by @seungcy

woozi :

find my way back by @haosvteen

forelsket by @escapewriter

adore you by @networkluvs

now playing by @flickerchans

DK :

we have chemistry by @seungcy

what is love by @cupidhaos

the8 :

i just see you by @svtskneecaps

flip a coin by @grassywoozi

falling for u (literally) by @sbnchaos

vernon :

intertwined strings by @memesolvernonchwe

lie again by @escapewriter

HYYH : golden years by @sw1mmingfoolz

two minus one by @twogyuu

dino :

play it again by @svtskneecaps

imperfect love by @yaehao

yours truly by @networkluvs

multiple/unknown until the end:

thank you next? by @shionwrites

overdue by @kwanisms

by my side by @grassywoozi

redamancy by @escapewriter

radio star by @got-svt

can i love by @unmanageable-day

kismet and misfortune by @lovingyu04

charmed by @strawberry-svt

keep it fruity by @cupidhaos

Masterlist

how wonwoo says “i love you” for the first time 💌

he carries you all the way to the bathroom, bridal style and all, just so he can clean your knee. he stays silent as he helps you sit down on the edge of the bathtub and even when you wince in pain, his lips are sealed in a thin line. you look at wonwoo every once in awhile as he dabs your knee with a sterile gauze, noticing the wrinkles that formed between his eyebrows as he inspects your bleeding knee.

you reach out to smooth the wrinkles between his eyebrows with your fingertips and he momentarily stops his movements just to look at you. “i’m sorry,” you finally speak, your lower lip jutting out to let him know just how sorry you are for being so careless.

he shakes his head, and returns his attention back to your cut. he cleans your cut in no time and he leaves you to sit on the edge whilst he throws the red gauze in the bin. you stare at him through the mirror as he washes his hands and his face remains unreadable.

“woo i said i’m sorry,” you attempt to stand up but one look at you through the mirror sends you back down. “why’d you have to be so carelesss yn?” he finally replies, spinning around and leaning against the sink.

“i just wanted to surprise ‘s all,” you mumble, your head dropping in embarrassment. you wanted to surprise him for your 6th monthsary but after tangling yourself with the fairy lights and falling off the stool, the ruckus had him running down from his bedroom to the living room where he found you laying on the floor. he didn’t know his heart could drop so low at the sight of you.

“i really don’t get why we have to celebrate our 6th month together,” he sighs, running a hand through his hair. he closes the gap between you two as he kneels between your legs. he cups your cheeks with his warm hands. wonwoo loses his train of thoughts as he continues to look into your eyes and without being able to stop himself, he whispers the three words you’ve been aching to hear from him.

“i love you okay? i don’t need any fairy lights or a blanket fort, i just want you.”

you grin so widely at his words that the pain coursing through your knees subsides momentarily. you cup his cheeks in your hands too, placing a long and soft kiss on his lips.

“i love you too.”

bittersweet | jeon wonwoo (masterlist)

☆.*+ seventeen social media au

★ synopsis: in which y/n and wonwoo are forced to share an apartment in secret.

★ taglist: to join the taglist, sign up with the google form!

★ genre: good morning call!au, college!au, roommate!au, enemies to lovers, fake dating, angst, fluff, comedy

★ pairings: jeon wonwoo x female reader

★ start: june 18th, 2021     ★ end: july 23, 2021

☆.*+ profiles

★ profiles 1

★ profiles 2

★ profiles 3

☆.*+ chapters

★ prologue pt. 1

★ prologue pt. 2

★ one. our love is real

★ two. spice tolerance

★ three. broken

★ four. photo frame

★ five. iced americano

★ six. chefs kiss

★ seven. the rules

★ eight. national treasure

★ nine. if you're happy

★ ten. dilf

★ eleven. you can be my teacher

★ twelve. 71%

★ thirteen. healed

★ fourteen. hot girl summer

★ fifteen. photosynthesizing

★ sixteen. love u forever

★ seventeen. under the moonlight

★ eighteen. anything for you

★ nineteen. is your boyfriend single

★ twenty. exposed

★ twenty one. for the better

★ twenty two. i'll make it up to you

★ twenty three. new addition

★ bonus! binki

bittersweet | jeon wonwoo (masterlist)

☆.*+ seventeen social media au

★ synopsis: in which y/n and wonwoo are forced to share an apartment in secret.

★ taglist: to join the taglist, sign up with the google form!

★ genre: good morning call!au, college!au, roommate!au, enemies to lovers, fake dating, angst, fluff, comedy

★ pairings: jeon wonwoo x female reader

★ start: june 18th, 2021     ★ end: july 23, 2021

☆.*+ profiles

★ profiles 1

★ profiles 2

★ profiles 3

☆.*+ chapters

★ prologue pt. 1

★ prologue pt. 2

★ one. our love is real

★ two. spice tolerance

★ three. broken

★ four. photo frame

★ five. iced americano

★ six. chefs kiss

★ seven. the rules

★ eight. national treasure

★ nine. if you're happy

★ ten. dilf

★ eleven. you can be my teacher

★ twelve. 71%

★ thirteen. healed

★ fourteen. hot girl summer

★ fifteen. photosynthesizing

★ sixteen. love u forever

★ seventeen. under the moonlight

★ eighteen. anything for you

★ nineteen. is your boyfriend single

★ twenty. exposed

★ twenty one. for the better

★ twenty two. i'll make it up to you

★ twenty three. new addition

★ bonus! binki

bittersweet | masterlist

☆.*+ seventeen social media au

★ synopsis: in which y/n and wonwoo are forced to share an apartment in secret.

★ taglist: to join the taglist, sign up with the google form!

★ genre: good morning call!au, angst, fluff, comedy

★ pairings: jeon wonwoo x female reader

★ start: june 18th, 2021     ★ end: ???

☆.*+ profiles

★ profiles 1

★ profiles 2

★ profiles 3

☆.*+ chapters

★ prologue pt. 1

★ prologue pt. 2

★ one. our love is real

★ two. spice tolerance

★ three. broken

★ four. photo frame

★ five. iced americano

★ six. chefs kiss

★ seven. the rules

★ eight. national treasure

★ nine. if you're happy

★ ten. dilf

★ eleven. you can be my teacher

★ twelve. 71%

★ thirteen. healed

★ fourteen. hot girl summer

★ fifteen. photosynthesizing

★ sixteen. love u forever

★ & more...

baby, all i really want is your attention | kim mingyu

ミ★ synopsis: you and mingyu have been academic rivals since the beginning of your high school career. having always aimed for the #1 spot, mingyu would beat you without even needing to study. now dedicating all your time into studying at the local library, you find yourself wondering who keeps neatly packing your things and waking you up each time you fall asleep while studying. [requested by @omgnctchina​]

ミ★ genre: enemies to lovers!au, high school!au, studious!reader, bad boy!mingyu, humor, fluff

ミ★ warnings: some suggestive jokes, underage drinking (they’re like 18 in this, but be safe out there fellas)

ミ★ word count: 8,442 (im so fucking sorry)

ミ★ pairings: mingyu x gender neutral reader

ミ★ notes: hi guys ! long time no svt oneshot, kek my bad. i’ve been busy working on something… wink. anyways, i hope you guys enjoy this mingyu fic ! make sure to give him lots of love <333

ミ★ taglist: @sunlightwoo​ @coppertrashi​ @purplehoranghae​ @brinnalaine​ @minluvly​ @wonunuu​ @suhfluffy​ @shuajeong​ @euphorencia​ @seoulbinz​ @minghao-will-be-the-death-of-me​ @jenuubiii​ @jaeyuni​ @sunflowergyeomie​ @cheolliehugs​ @fallinchan​ @a-vian​ @kodzumo​ @dwcljh​ @sbnchaos​ @taeguk-munchkin​ @w8nuzone​ @miyuuraiura​ @semicolorn​ @haonysus​ @anissanightyoung​ @serenadesvt​ @linhyyboo12​ @junjungsunwoo​ @smileyjimvn @adoreateez 

Keep reading

⚬ pairing: prince!seokmin x fem!reader ⚬ word count: 12,690 ⚬ warnings: none. ⚬ genre: enemies to lovers, arranged marriage, angst, teasing, some slowburn romance, superfluff toward the end.

✧✎ synopsis: the time has come for prince seokmin to meet his arranged marriage, which forces you to confront a strange predicament: if you truly hate the prince, then why does the thought of him being with someone else hurt this badly?

✧✎ a/n: yeah… i’ve wanted to write some prince!lsm since his excalibur pictures. evidently, i am very late! i hope u enjoy nonetheless :-)

Hiking up the long, heavy layers of your dress, pale and coloured like lilacs, you retrieved a small carving knife that had been clandestinely strapped against your outer thigh. Buried a few feet away from you in the grass was a smooth, palm-sized piece of beech wood, which you quickly picked up before walking back to the bench. You sat down horizontally, stretching out your legs and taking up as much space as possible whilst you started carving down the edges of the beech wood, flicking away the occasional shavings.

Keep reading

If You Know This

Pairings: Mingyu x fem!reader 

Synopsis: “It’s going to take more than a bad omen to ruin our marriage after all we’ve been through, Gyu.”

Genre: Fluff, crack, a good smattering of angst, medieval times(?), stableboy!Mingyu, princess!reader, knight!Jihoon, squire!Soonyoung, brother!Seungkwan, suitor!Joshua, cinderella (with a twist)!au

Warnings: Social inequalities, kissing, Jihoon continues to be disgusted™

Also the use of the terms “stable boy” is out of endearment, not to belittle said character!

WC: ~1350

A/N: I should be finishing my Jun fic, but I missed this couple so here **runs in tears**

Taglist: @autumn-lv @ann-non​

Read the original story, If The Horseshoe Fits.

“You clean up well, stable boy.”

Mingyu’s eyes softened in surprise as he lifted from the gold-rimmed mirror that he was concentrating on while he was adjusting the last few buttons of his velvet blue military suit jacket. He pressed his lips into a tight line, in an attempt to suppress the shy smile growing at your words. Per usual, he couldn’t hold it for long, however; his infamous childish, yet handsome grin with his canines peeking out from underneath his top lip eventually broke through when his gaze settled on your again. There was a sanguine glint reflecting in his eyes. Contrary to the tales of the heart fluttering feeling you get when you fall in love he grew up being told, the sight of you always brought a sense of warmth and calm to Mingyu. Despite being in the castle for the past three years, it quite hadn’t felt like home yet. He wasn’t sure if it was the scornful looks from the passing nobles or awkward title of “sir” from his former colleagues. Your presence brought a veil of repose and security when uncertainty rampaged the depths of his mind. 

Keep reading

guitar string : l.jh

word count | 1.6k

pairing | lee jihoon (svt) x gender neutral reader

warning(s) / includes | running away, mentions of arranged marriage (lmk if i missed anything!!)

genre | fluff, angst, royal au

note | written with @ohmygoshcheese in mind for the carat admirer event 💗 hi rachel, i’m your carat admirer hehe <33 it’s been so fun getting to know and i hope we can continue interacting after this event 🥺 i’m not sure if this counts as a fantasy au but i hope you like this lil drabble i wrote for you, happy valentine’s day hehe :>

a/n: sorry i can’t really think of a summary but dw it’s pretty straightforward ;-; also three fics in three days? who is she? 😍 (more to come btw hehe)

“Take me away.”

Jihoon’s elegant fingers, previously plucking at his guitar strings, freeze at your words. The soothing, lullaby-like chords he had been playing echo into the inky darkness, carried away by the chilly night breeze.

His head snaps up, finding you staring into the distance forlornly, eyes misting over as the corners of your lips turn down melancholically.

“P-Pardon, Your Highness?” The title you’ve come to loathe spills from his lips out of force of habit before he can catch himself.

Heavy is the exhale that leaves you when you turn to him. He’s found you enchanting ever since the moment you met, but perhaps even more so under the silvery luminescence of the moon during your clandestine meetings on the marble balcony of your quarters.

Yet, as you gaze at him with what can only be ascribed to pure, unadulterated sadness, the deep frown that mars your features threatens to settle permanently, and the hollows of your face are now hauntingly accentuated by the moonlight.

“Take me away,” you repeat, a little firmer this time, “I cannot bear a moment of this any longer.”

Two weeks. Two weeks had gone by since your father announced your betrothal to a neighbouring prince to unite your kingdoms. Of course, Jihoon was with you that very night, guitar abandoned at the edge of your bed in favour of stroking your hair with your head laid in his lap.

“But I don’t love him,” you whisper. Tears escape the corner of your eye, rolling down your smooth cheeks like crystalline dewdrops on petals at dawn. “I hardly know him, Jihoon. How am I supposed to marry him?”

“Perhaps… you’ll grow to love him.” Against his will, his voice cracks towards the end, the lump lodged in his throat ever growing. Invisible vines wrap around the column of his neck in a phantom force, constricting his breathing at the thought that in a month, you will truly be another’s.

Jihoon has always known that falling in love with you came with a hefty cost. To put it quite simply, your paths were not meant to cross. He was a mere musician who happened to receive the honour of entertaining the royal family at your father’s fiftieth birthday; he was not supposed to meet your eyes as he walked off the stage, he was not supposed to accept when you summoned him to the palace a week later requesting private guitar lessons, he was not supposed to let you in when you both knew that this relationship was fated for doom from the very beginning.

You smile, bittersweet and knowing. “I don’t think I can love him, Jihoon.”

Because my heart has long been yours.

Deep down, you knew this would happen. Born into royalty, you understood your role as a mere chess piece in a game much larger than your happiness, or yourself for that matter. The majority of your life was spent moulding you to become the perfect ruler, or rather—the perfect consort to your future spouse. You knew it was coming, yet reality had only truly sunken in with your father’s announcement: your life would never be truly yours.

Unless you did something about it.

Countless times in the past, you’ve confided in him about your desire to run away, yet you continue to remain out of fear, guilt, and responsibility. This time, however, it feels different. There’s something about your demeanour tonight that has uneasiness bubbling in his stomach.

“I… I cannot do that, Y/N.”

He feels your piercing stare searing through his side profile. “Is it… is it because you’re afraid of being caught with me? B-Because I will not dare ask you to stay with me after we cross the borders if that is not what you wish to do.”

Jihoon’s heart aches at your words. He loves you, deeply, and he loathes that he’s planted a seed of doubt in your mind which led you to the conclusion that he does not wish to be with you. Truthfully, he’s thought about offering to run away with you as well, but a little voice at the back of his head dissuades him from doing so each time.

Thus, he shakes his head, woefully, regretfully. “No, it has nothing to do with that…”

“Then why not?” you demand, eyes now fierce with defiance as you briskly cross the balcony towards the ornate chair he sat in. Jihoon flinches when you fall to your knees, your robes forming silky, luxurious waves at his feet.

“Ever since my father announced my engagement, I have spent restless nights questioning the remainder of my life,” you continue, staring up with him with glassy, pleading eyes, “and I’ve decided I no longer want to be confined to one where I cannot be happy nor free.”

A part of you hardly believes you’ve been reduced to such a state. You grew up believing no request of yours was too preposterous or unimaginable, everywhere you went you were accompanied by easily a dozen attendants whose lives depended on catering to your every whim. And yet look at you now—begging like a commoner.

It’s refreshing. It makes you feel human because for once in your life, you’re not just a puppet on strings or a little canary in a cage.

“I don’t have anything I can give you,” Jihoon whispers. His clammy hands find yours and clutches tightly. The drags of his rough, callused finger pads against your soft, unflawed skin is a painful reminder of his inability to give you the life he thinks you deserve. “With him, you will have more lands and jewels and riches… all I have is the guitar on my back. I cannot give you a comfortable life, Y/N. I… I can only give you my love.”

“Can’t you see, Jihoon?” you weep, tears falling behind shut eyes, “that’s all I desire! I only ask for a life with someone who loves me, not someone who sees me as a diplomatic tool.”

He rests his forehead on yours, one of his hands reaching up to find the side of your face as his thumb catches the salty trails. “You can’t go back if I take you away. Have you thought this through?”

“I have, and I don’t care if I have to run from them for the rest of my life. I only want to be with you. If… if you’ll have me, t-that is…”

Jihoon smiles comfortingly at the insecure wobble in your voice, rubbing soothing circles at your temple in an attempt to ease your doubts. “Of course I do, my love,” he tells you, “but the last thing I want is for you to live with regrets. I roam faraway lands in search of new muses alone until I came to your kingdom and met you, I’m used to a life of running. You… you’d be leaving your family, everything you’ve ever had and known behind with little to no chance to return. I only wish you happiness in life, but I have fears you won’t find it with me either.”

“I’m willing to take that risk. I just want to live a normal life… with you.”

He searches your eyes for any trace of hesitation, any sign of apprehension towards the thought of starting anew with absolutely nothing to your name. What he unearths instead is unyielding resolution swimming in your hardened gaze; his heart still hammers in his rib cage like a war drum—after all, the consequences should the two of you get caught will most certainly be severe, and perhaps deadly—but your determination eases a little of that fear. Now, he's never been a particularly optimistic person, but the sliver of hope that still exists within him makes him want to believe he is worthy, that you will find happiness with him.

And it is that little splinter that leads to his next words. “Then we better start preparing, my love. We don’t have much time.”

If someone had told you a year ago that you’d be on horseback past the borders of your kingdom in the dark of night, with only endless plains ahead of you and your belongings packed in a single sack, you’d surely dismiss them with a wave of your hand. Little did you know that you’d soon meet a travelling musician with infinite talent and somehow even more love in his heart for you.

The castle you grew up in is now a speck in the distance. Strangely enough, you don’t feel an ounce of longing or regret. If they were willing to give you away, who could blame you for running?

Jihoon observes you quietly from a few paces ahead. “It’s not too late to go back,” he tells you.

You shake your head, turning back to him with a smile as your horse trots onwards to catch up to him. Pale is the starlight that lays gentle kisses on your faces, and as you look up at the endless glittering diamonds that will guide your way, you know in your heart that this is only the true beginning of your life. Jihoon seems to realise this too, because when your eyes shift from the cosmos above to lock onto his, he offers you a warm smile.

“Let’s keep going, love,” he says softly, nodding towards the long journey ahead of you. “Let’s go home.”

(And when Jihoon marries you a year later with a ring fastened from a string he plucked from an old guitar, one passed down onto him by his father, you knew you had made the right choice.

You never left home, because he was with you all along.)

𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ෆ

ෆ synopsis: kwon soonyoung loves too hard and falls in love too quickly, accidentally building a (very false!!!) fuckboy image that he can’t seem to get rid of. when his friends talk him out of proposing to a girl he went on 2 dates with, he finally realizes he has a big problem with love. signing up to appear on his university’s most popular youtube talk show to unload his baggage and fix his image? what could possibly go wrong?

ෆ pairing: college student! ksy x reader (gn)

ෆ genre: fluff, humor, romance

ෆ series warnings: anxiety/insecurities, cursing, food/drinks, ksy’s character is extremely 🥺🤧

ෆ status: completed

ෆ started: feb 1st - may 23rd, 2022

ෆ a/n: I noticed that i tend to write a lot along the lines of angst or serious/mature themes so i'm really excited to switch to something more relaxed, fluffy, and feel-good. this is 100% a comfort fic. please let me know if I missed any warnings!

wondernus main masterlist

profiles: [X], [X], [X]

chapters:

0. prologue

1. bag

2. wallet

3. keys

4. phone

5. earphones

6. water bottle

7. glasses

8. reusable straw

9. pens

10. notebook

11. planner

12. receipts

13. lip balm

14. snacks

15. trash

16. textbooks

17. hat

18. umbrella

19. reusable bag

20. watch

21. small pouch

22. vitamins

23. bandages

24. painkillers

25. perfume

26. hand sanitizer

27. hand wipes

28. tissues

29. ear plugs

30. toothpicks

31. cough drops

32. masks

33. spf

34. breath mints

35. folders

36. laptop

37. portable charger

38. calculator

39. charm

40. utensils

41. cushion

42. polaroid

43. dog treats

44. end

bonus chapters:

josh in vegas

himbos

them

New Rules

Title: New Rules

Genre: basketballplayer!mingyu, collegestudent!reader, fakedating!au, fluff, angst, s2l, smut

Tags/Warnings: Cheating, heartbreak, gender neutral reader, slow burn, smut, creampie, unprotected :/, general arguments between the reader and some characters, alcohol drinking, hurt and comfort, 26k words

This is a part of a sports collaboration being hosted by @gyukult​ . Thank you so much for the opportunity to write this I seriously never would have come up with this idea and written this had it not been for this collab!

Summary:

Kim Mingyu is the star basketball player of your schools’ team, and one of the most popular boys in your entire University. You’re just a college student with the best boyfriend in the world.

-

You stared at the lake in front of you, your eyebrows furrowing in concentration. You felt the breeze blow through the trees, and you shivered a little despite the warm fall sun beating down on you.

You weren’t cold for long, after only a moment warm arms wrapped around your body, tugging you close. You smiled, a giggle leaving your lips.

Keep reading

𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ෆ

ෆ synopsis: kwon soonyoung loves too hard and falls in love too quickly, accidentally building a (very false!!!) fuckboy image that he can’t seem to get rid of. when his friends talk him out of proposing to a girl he went on 2 dates with, he finally realizes he has a big problem with love. signing up to appear on his university’s most popular youtube talk show to unload his baggage and fix his image? what could possibly go wrong?

ෆ pairing: college student! ksy x reader (gn)

ෆ genre: fluff, humor, romance

ෆ series warnings: anxiety/insecurities, cursing, food/drinks, ksy’s character is extremely 🥺🤧

ෆ status: completed

ෆ started: feb 1st - may 23rd, 2022

ෆ a/n: I noticed that i tend to write a lot along the lines of angst or serious/mature themes so i'm really excited to switch to something more relaxed, fluffy, and feel-good. this is 100% a comfort fic. please let me know if I missed any warnings!

wondernus main masterlist

profiles: [X], [X], [X]

chapters:

0. prologue

1. bag

2. wallet

3. keys

4. phone

5. earphones

6. water bottle

7. glasses

8. reusable straw

9. pens

10. notebook

11. planner

12. receipts

13. lip balm

14. snacks

15. trash

16. textbooks

17. hat

18. umbrella

19. reusable bag

20. watch

21. small pouch

22. vitamins

23. bandages

24. painkillers

25. perfume

26. hand sanitizer

27. hand wipes

28. tissues

29. ear plugs

30. toothpicks

31. cough drops

32. masks

33. spf

34. breath mints

35. folders

36. laptop

37. portable charger

38. calculator

39. charm

40. utensils

41. cushion

42. polaroid

43. dog treats

44. end

bonus chapters:

josh in vegas

himbos

them

BLURRY LINES

PAIRING :

roommate!kang taehyun x fem!reader

GENRE :

fluff, angst, crack(?)

WARNINGS :

curse words, bad & suggestive jokes

SYNOPSIS :

if there's anything y/n's good at, it's differentiating her feelings between love or hate. it's so distinct, she really doesn't get it when people say they have mixed feelings about something, cause to her, love is LOVE and hate is, well... HATE. LOVE is like her feelings for prodsputnik, an anonymous soundcloud artist she adores which she may or may not have a stan account for. HATE is like her feelings towards her roommate, kang taehyun. she even claimed that researchers are bullshitting when they say there's a thin line between hate and love. but what if y/n figures out that prodsputnik and kang taehyun is the same person? will the line between love and hate stay thick and clear as fuck (y/n's words) to y/n or will it get blurry?

STATUS :

completed

START :

Sept 23, 2021

END :

Jan 23, 2022

TAGLIST: CLOSED

@gyuuss @btxtreads @terrytaehyunnies @miraculyfe @yoonkeehoe @derinxfam @snowfalltxt @taehyunsfel @letmeal0ne @cosmiclele @cerisetalks @meowtella @shrutiajit @msxflower @lomlyeonjun @lokideadontheinside @arminandjeanandannieandhange @nycol-ie @00-baejin-05 @summery-bat @txtville @wkhdery @stray-bi-kids @mintbgyu @she-is-dreaming @yeonyeonyeonjun @sunflowerbebe07 @simpforscoups @multi4lifer @beomjundiaries @whoe-dis @ahnneyong @kac-chowsballs @bucket05 @iyeonjuni @beomsun @day6andetcetera @uygmoeb @wh4txium1n @carolnina55 @youreverydayzebra @nshitae @milkycloudtyg @soobsdior @roseless1213 @sulkii @pinkheadflowers @multiwendi @mygwarai @envy-brr @she-is-dreaming @pikapikapikaachuu @ttaeycngg @rlajjunie @chillfilms

CHAPTERS :

(SECRET) PROFILES | ASTRONOMIES BESTIES | EMO BAND | LINE 1 | LINE 2 | LINE 3 | LINE 4 | LINE 5 | LINE 6 | LINE 7 | LINE 8 | LINE 9 | LINE 10 | LINE 11 | LINE 12 | LINE 13 | LINE 14 | LINE 15 | LINE 16 | LINE 17 | LINE 18 | LINE 19 | LINE 20 | LINE 21 | LINE 22 | LINE 23 | LINE 24 | LINE 25 | LINE 26 | LINE 27 | LINE 28 | LINE 29 | LINE 30 | LINE 31 | LINE 32 | LINE 33 | LINE 34 | LINE 35 | LINE 36 | LINE 37 | LINE 38 | EXTRA

ALWAYS, I’LL CARE | myg

pairing: idol!min yoongi x producer!reader

genre: social media au [smau], idol!au, childhood friends to lovers, fluff, humor, idiots in love

warnings: reader uses she/her pronouns, explicit language, very slight angst

summary: y/n l/n used to help produce music for min yoongi years and years ago. together, they were recruited by bighit entertainment under the impression of being producers for the company. however, yoongi goes on to debut with six other members in idol group bts. but y/n does end up continuing to produce in the limelight for other artists.

status: ongoing !!

author’s note: hi, this is my first bts fic and first smau, so i hope you enjoy! don’t be afraid to give me feedback in the asks. lastly, this story does not follow actual timeline or events, & please ignore the time stamps on the pictures. thank you for reading !

main masterlist

ALWAYS, I’LL CARE

prologue

profiles — then

00 — the gloss and mae show

00 — someone named kim namjoon

chapters

profiles — now pt 1

profiles — now pt 2

01 — dude that’s fucked up

02 — (she) be(lie)ve(d)

03 — nice tunes

04 — stick with music bestie

05 — it’s just a cute alliteration

06 — shut up i’m raging rn

NOW WE’RE EVEN

“good luck trying to get rid of me”

pairing: jungkook x reader

genre: crack; enemies to lovers; fake dating au; sm au.

warnings: explicit jokes; some angsty realizations about feelings ; mentions of stalking

summary: in which in a serious of unfortunate events a piece of paper promising jungkook she'd do anything to return a favour comes back to haunt y/n. who would've thought jungkook would actually ask her to return the favour and expect her to be his fake girlfriend. oh well, accidents happen and jungkook never forgets promises.

— masterlist

part 1. explicit brain

part 2. pure poison

part 3. real girlfriend

part 4. explaining to do

part 5. shower thoughts

part 6. min devil

part 7. bully on main

part 8. dinner?? together??

part 9. locked INSIDE

part 10. enemies since birth

part 11. shaking in fear

part 12. elevator talk

part 13. same person

part 14. it’s ART

part 15. only threats

part 16. accidents happen

part 17. ugly scream

part 18. say goodnight

part 19. ugly words

part 20. strange feeling

part 21. jealousy is a disease

part 22. baby??

part 23. accidently confessed

part 24. ITS A JOKE

part 25. poisonous cake

part 26. heartfelt behaviour

part 27. accidently matching

part 28. that's my girl

part 29. intentional confession

part 30. now we're even

end.

by popular demand I rewrote this au and here it is 😽 I hope u enjoy it

Yoonkook Fic Recs for the year of the Tiger

Happy New Year! 🐅 If you're sick and trapped at home (like I am), here's a few of my favorite Yoonkook fics to get you through 💕

(these are all complete and over 10K, I might do a list for short fics later)

👍Yes to smut:

Only for Tonight by dreamingdaegu

one of my all time favs, I've read it several times, the emotional intensity and slow realization of feelings is just 💯

crush me. by naturallyvante

super visceral, mostly sexual tension and then very emotional smut

consign me not to darkness by bellamees

Daechwita inspired historical enemies to lovers awesomeness

The Casual Corruption of Jeon Jungkook by Baggy_Trousers

Yoongi helps Jungkook figure out his sexuality 👀👀

🚫No to smut:

twenty first century boy by xiajin

Genderfluid Kook 💜 super cute, hurts a little, one I come back to often

a paper crown by nitilia

YG leaves his idol group, meets pet fish store owner JK. Love the vibe of this fic, it's very quiet and contemplative

twenty-four by fruitily

The one where Tae handcuffs Yoonkook together for 24 hours ✨ everything by fruitily is amazing tbh

about soulmates and inevitable doom also by fruitily lol

Normally not super into soulmates aus, but this one is such an interesting take. YG is angsty, JK just wants to meet his soulmate

no trouble

“I refuse to believe I got on one knee and asked you to marry me”

pairing: yoongi x reader

genre: crack, slight angst, roommates au, enemies to lovers.

summary: living with min yoongi, the salt of the earth, was never part of the plan but what can you do when he threatens to tell everyone the embarrassing secret you both share, that you're both accidently legally married after a weekend in vegas.

warnings: mentions of suggestive behavior, use of cuss words

masterlist

1. quivered in fear

2. remember vegas

3. m*n yoong*

4. sus behavior

5. acting like besties

6. seokjin's fat ass

7. unwanted opinion

8. birthday suit

9. unrealistic behavior

10. poisoned cookies

11. starting SHIT

12. legally married

13. divorce me

14. you'll be in contact with my lawyers

15. jimin's suspicions

16. get over it

17. roomies only

18. wine drunk

19. babysit my fish

20. jealous?? ME??

21. wife material

22. finally divorced

23. sad behavior

24. no trouble

end.

enjoy!

a.n. after a long hiatus your bff is back for this au 😽!!

how long will we fall

pairing: jungkook x reader

wordcount: 14k

glimpse: if it’s fate, it should already be set onto your skin — that’s why jungkook’s initials are already on your finger. he’s always there for you, but not only for you. if you’re his fate, he’d rather not have it.

alternatively, jungkook’s your soulmate, but he doesn’t want to be.

[ soulmate au, painful f2l, unrequited love (at first), a lot of angst, more fluff n wholesome moments, emotional constipation, yearning, jealousy, swearing, reverse cards that make u cheer, redemption arc, i swear to u that this does not hurt as much as heartburn did ]

notes: i'm back with a big fic!!! :D this was originally supposed to be named something else but i realized that the title was Too Serious and u know what,,, ten listens later as i write this, i realized that i'm obsessed with this song that i received from this ask and wow thank u so much anon <33 although the rec isn't originally for this fic, it fits perfectly and i can't thank u enough <33

as always, lmk what you think <3 send in feedback n love to my askbox anytime!! even replying to this post sends me over the moon :)

There will never be another Jeon Jungkook in this world — that much you're sure of.

You're sure of it because it feels as if it's a universal truth. An irrevocable and irreversible one that you don't bother verifying because Jungkook carries his presence with finality, obvious that he carries security within himself the most.

If he were to slip away from your grasp for any reason beneath or beyond you, you’d know that he leave a vacuum in his wake. Jungkook isn’t yours for you to lose, but he is yours for you to long for.

You know this because Jungkook is the type of beauty you won't ever grow used to despite spending years, with him and around him. You're both seniors in college and yet you don't feel like it, despite being born just a couple months earlier than him (therefore older) which irks him to this day. You don't feel like it because his presence alone makes you feel like you're in elementary figuring out your heart flutters from square one.

If he were to star in a show, he’d be the mainstay character everyone fawns over. He would be the one to stay in the biggest trailer, have the most doting team, and have the brightest lights on him. If Jungkook was a star, he’d rake in all the money by himself.

If Jungkook were to be yours, you’d never want for anything more.

“Are you seriously — don’t sleep on me!”

Jungkook’s voice is the first thing that snaps you out of your reverie, reminding you once again that you think of him even if he’s already in your presence, an endearingly-type of new low for you.

“I wasn’t sleeping on you,” you snort with a defensive cross of your arms across your chest, the prospect of rest making you yawn in suppression with your mouth closed, eyes tearing up and your nostrils flaring instead.

“Yeah but you were zoning out on me,” he sing-songs in faux irritation, twirling on his chair with an accusing point of his finger, “and that means I have two minutes left to talk to you before you fall asleep.”

The only reason you’re awake is because Jungkook practically begged to keep you up as emotional (and actual) support for the entirety of the assignments he’s been cramming.

You share a spacious dorm and yet the two of you are cooped up in his room because his mind would overload if he’s in someplace else, eyes surely gonna shake if he were to write essays on the coffee table in the living room or at the bar stool in the kitchen.

“What do you need me for now?”

Need.

It’s nice being needed.

It’s nice being needed that despite Jungkook’s initials on your ring finger that tied him to you as your soulmate, and his unawareness of it, Jungkook needs you.

The initials on one’s left ring finger develops over time. Some take mere years after their birth while others take decades. Starts off faint until they become clear red letters right on your vena amoris, inked on the skin above the vein that’s closest to your heart.

It gets fully-developed when it’s fully-realized. Having Jungkook’s bright and clear on your finger didn’t necessarily mean your initials reflect the same condition on his.

It was personal preference, really — whether or not you choose to cover up the soulmate mark or not. You’ve always chosen to cover your finger up with a ring because you didn’t want to freak your best friend ever since childhood that simply put, the two of you are soulmates.

Jungkook, just like you, chooses to wear a ring. In fact, he even wears the same one that you do because he argues that even if you’ve bought the silver signet ring first with the money you’ve saved up for years (it wasn’t cheap at all), he thought about it first.

That’s where the connection ends; only goes so far for the two of you to have matching rings to cover up your soulmate marks.

Jungkook, adamantly and stubbornly since the start, doesn’t like looking at his ring finger.

Even before there were faint outlines of ink, too vague for it to resemble your initials, eight-year old Jungkook would start having things around his particular digit, whether it’s a two-day old ring pop he leaves in the fridge or a piece of yarn that accidentally almost cuts off his blood circulation.

You remember Mrs. Jeon sheepishly explaining to curious onlookers whenever both of your families would go out for trips and that out of the two youngest members of their entourage, the handsome child with the wide eyes would have some sort of cover on his ring finger at an early age, be it an oven mitten or a headband scrunched up.

“I like not knowing who’s apparently meant for me.”

You’ve asked him multiple times throughout your life, all for Jungkook to be consistent and give you the same answer every time.

The same answer when you were kids as you repetitively flicked the tip of his ring finger with your eyes closed as instructed by him, in panic to make him feel something because he’s covered his mark with yet another ribbon too tightly, and in respect because even he himself didn’t want to see the ink.

The same answer when you were teenagers and you’re getting Christmas gifts together and Jungkook just looked too much like your ideal boyfriend with the way he’s lining up for you on the counter and is watching over all the items, pulling you closer every now and then when the prospect of losing you to the crowd gets higher with every rush.

The same answer now while you’re passing the time on his bed as he’s hunched over his desk, a harmless question included randomly into your series of sleep-induced curiosity; the question of why he doesn’t want to know about his soulmate, asked in the same breath of casualness to whether Jungkook preferred his rice better cooked with too much water or too less of it, or if he’d go home for the holidays with presents already prepared.

“Is that a kink?” you scrunch your nose at his unwavering consistency, knowing you would’ve liked it for any other situation besides this.

Jungkook breathily laughs, shrugging his shoulders carelessly as if the two of you are talking about the weather and he’s admitted that it’s been years since he’s last looked at a forecast willingly.

“I don’t wanna know, really. I still breathe without knowing who they are.”

The way he says it is easy, no underlying malice indicated in his tone at all. He says it in the way as if he’s been asked this a hundred times and his response is natural and well-lived, not once changing.

“I don’t believe in fate.”

Hurt doesn’t even explain half the pain in your chest all this time but in this light with the way you’re simply asking him why he doesn’t want a soulmate, why he doesn’t want you by extension — it’s only an ache.

It’s only an ache that pacifies on your bones instead of gnawing on them. It’s drawn-out yet dull, the pain not striking you enough to the point that you even hum at him to elaborate.

“Because what if I don’t end up loving them? What if the one I end up loving isn’t the one the universe apparently destined for me?” Jungkook goes on, lips in a slight pout. “Love doesn’t have initials.”

You sink further into his pillow, playing with your fingers yet retaining your gaze on him.

“You don’t have to love your soulmate.”

Read: you don’t have to love me.

Additionally: you don’t have to love me because having you in this platonic way atleast gives me the semblance that you love me even by a fraction, but if you love me in the same way I love you, it’d be nice.

“You say that now to make me believe in them,” he snorts, twirling a pen between his fingers with a genuinely curious gaze, “but what happens if you aren’t the one they want?”

You haven’t been doing anything and yet you still stop in your tracks, the question echoing in your mind as you repeat his query out loud.

“What happens if your soulmate doesn’t want you?”

What does happen?

You don’t die. You don’t puke flowers.

There’s no catch to it. There’s no grand consequence to having your soulmate not want you.

It makes you think once of your present situation and rethink twice of every decision you’ve ever made beforehand when your ring finger was still plain and devoid of his initials; when the only person you’ve made plans with and for isn’t just yourself, when it wasn’t him.

Jungkook doesn’t want you.

What’s supposed to happen to you?

“I need you to stop zoning out and help me make this essay!” he whines demandingly and it’s the last thing that pulls you out of your thoughts, sitting up straighter.

“If you start asking now, I can actually start helping you, y’know?”

Jungkook’s in STEM while you’re a literary major, the obvious exchange of help being convenient, yet the only difference is that when you make him answer your worksheets, you don’t wait until it’s three hours before the supposed deadline.

He’s giddy now that he’ll get to finish his last assignment due, eyes scanning back to the instructions because his attention span’s already been spent looking at his phone.

“What's love to you?"

You freeze at the abruptness but you move on just as quick as you were surprised, remembering that it’s just the guideline for an essay and not the turning point you’ve expected it to be for a split second.

“How do you want me to answer that?

You ask lightly, humorously even, as you stand up from his bed, running a hand through your hair and working the knots of out of your neck before you get to work.

“I want you to answer it in the sense that I have a paper about love due tomorrow. At 12:00 in the morning.”

“Why?” Jungkook giggles additionally, nudging you with a shit-eating grin and a playful glint on his eyes. “How would you have wanted to answer that?”

“Nothing else,” you smile faintly, scooting him to out of his seat and switch positions so he could sit on his bed while you type for him at his desk. “I’m answering it in the sense that you would be lost without me.”

“Are you sure about that?”

It’s only meant to be a tease but it hits home nonetheless. Maybe it’s because you’re in your soulmate’s room underneath his lights and you’re visible to him. Maybe it’s because your mark pulses just ever so slightly underneath your ring, irritated and itchy underneath the silver as much as you feel hurt.

“Lost without me in the sense that you’d fail your subject if I don’t help you with your essay now."

( ♡ )

Anyone who’d meet Jungkook for the first time is likely to think of three things.

He looks clean. Handsome in a way that he looks effortless even if he wears the same oversized black shirt every guy wears outside, enough to garner second glances for himself. He’s tidy in the facet that he looks like he takes care of himself but not vain, far from annoying prep kids he scoffs at.

Jungkook looks rich and is rich. His family doesn’t come from generational wealth and yet they thrive from their own holdings, learning early-on that they owned a cottage near the beach and rented it out as they moved next-door, and the next thing you know is that at present, they own multiple properties and ventured out into food business that make absolute bank.

He carries himself with the stature that he knows what he’s doing, back sometimes slouched but dignified nonetheless, the air of importance surrounding him. Jungkook was raised in comfort but he’s humble, that much you’d bet your whole life into believing. He was the type to have pocket money whenever he goes out but he spends it in the same way you do, calculating his expenses mentally as if the bills in his wallet wouldn’t pay for the video games he’d want and even have some change afterwards.

He’s aware in the sense that he doesn’t forget where he comes from, admitting to you numerous times that his family having much disposable income sometimes bothers him. Jungkook thinks there’s an itch behind his ear whenever his dad proposes to eat at a five-star restaurant for dinner; that there’s a guilty pout on his face when his mom takes the initiative to buy him new sets of clothes because his shirts look too lived-in, even if he knows to himself that his wardrobe needed a change.

He’s down-to-earth and it reminds you of the way he’d forego all of his Fisher-Price toys just to try and plead to you if he could borrow your hand-me-down stuffies from your older siblings. Mr. and Mrs. Jeon are nothing but humble in the same way that they raised their child, despite the fact that in rare times, they have the taste for the finer things in life.

Mrs. Jeon’s beyond generous during the holiday seasons and you recall her gifting your mother the expensive casserole you’d catch her looking at in adoration whenever both your families had dinners, customized to her favorite color and attached with a heartfelt letter from Jungkook’s mom. Mr. Jeon practically adores your dad and looks up to him like a younger brother would, always taking him to fishing trips just and buying two pairs of the same things so the two of them could match.

Jungkook was raised-well and if it’s even possible at this point, he gets much more endearing in your eyes.

“Why would I not walk you home? We live together, if you haven’t realized.”

He says it when he sees you in campus as he drops everything to walk you home, even if your shared apartment isn’t his destination for the time being. He goes out of his way to ensure that if you stay home while he goes about his plans, there should be food in the fridge and cupboards that you’d actually like. He’d lock the door and try to budge it open from outside, and once he’s assured enough that it remains secured, he’d go about his routine of texting you to call him if you need him.

“You can have mine. I’m full anyway.”

Jungkook says it whenever the two of you end up ordering new items from menus and you end up liking your dish, offering you his plate nonchalantly. He insists that it just tastes average for him, and if he sees you hesitating on stealing some from his portion, he’d go as far as telling you that it tastes horrible so you wouldn’t feel guilty.

“Look! My mom sent you these! I told her you liked them.”

He calls you over every time his family’s goodies for him for the month arrives at the mail, laying the package on the floor as he waits for you to unbox it with him because he knows just how much you like going through things and organizing them. Mrs. Jeon always made sure to include something specifically meant for you in Jungkook’s box — whether it’s the family-sized portion of your recent cravings or your favorite hair treatment in bulk.

“Hey, wanna go on a drive with me?”

He asks you whenever he sees you too absorbed and frustrated in your studies in conjunction with whatever work gig you have at the time, heart panging to see you struggling to take care of yourself because he knows you have the tendency to try and finish everything as fast and as good as you could, not stopping even at personal circumstances. He’d simply put your pair of house slippers on the floor for you to wear, pull you up by your armpits to urge you to come with him, and he’d just drive. Would go through a drive-thru and take off from there, not pressuring you to open up to him at whatever cost.

Jungkook can’t sense you in the same way you do, like a soulmate would, but he cares for you in the way that he can tell when you don’t feel like functioning at all and you’re shutting down; you’re shutting even him off and that’s when he knows that something’s bothering you to no end even if he can’t decipher what is it.

Whatever’s in his power, Jungkook sits next to you, lies on top of you, and does almost everything to invade your personal space whenever you shut down — just because he doesn’t want to give up on you like how you do with him.

If anyone were to meet Jungkook for the first time, they’d know he’s uniquely himself.

He cleans up extremely good as he wears a suit to the grand opening of his family’s café, a dream of his mother ever since she was a teenager that became fully-realized and he can’t be any more happier seeing his parents content.

He greets people left and right with genuine happiness to see all of them ecstatic and supportive, eagerly shaking their hands with a full smile on his face. He draws everyone in effortlessly as if he’s inertia itself, well-aware that it can’t only possibly be you that looks at him with this much reverence.

There’s a red string of pull and you feel it when Jungkook stumbles on his feet on his way to you, feeling your body being slightly tugged downwards but you pull yourself up just as quick, playing it off by pretending that there’s a speck of dirt on your shoes.

He’s been looking for you for the past five minutes because it’s his mother’s fault that she wanted two floors for their café and it’s packed immediately on opening, pointing at you eagerly as he weaves through people. “There you are!”

It’s not your first time meeting Jungkook but you feel the same three things each time, heart swelling in size in familiarity of the person who inhabits it the most.

Jungkook giddily laughs and takes his position beside you, slinging an arm around your shoulders and making conversation with your parents for the umpteenth time, your head instinctively bending to lean against him. He looks every bit the part of the person you love the most in this world, despite being unsure if you even deserve to in the first place. He looks every bit of the guy that makes you realize you can’t deal with having anyone else’s initials on your finger, the words slipping out of you naturally.

“You look like someone’s first love.”

( ♡ )

You’re flawed.

You’re flawed and you don’t need anyone to tell you so in order to give yourself a wake-up call.

You’re flawed in a way because you feel dumb being so lovestruck and devoted with little to no point of salvation. You pride yourself in not being selfish but you’d be lying if you say don’t once hope that Jungkook would look at you in the way that you do. Every now and then would you feel the urge to demand from him insistently every second of the day that he should love you. That he owes you atleast that for the years you’ve spent helplessly trying to put him first rather than your own sanity.

But it feels wrong. It is wrong.

Jungkook doesn’t owe you anything and you know that much.

He doesn’t owe you anything and you shouldn’t expect for him to pay attention to you even if you’re his designated driver for the night, celebrating the end of the stressful semester by unwinding at a club.

He doesn’t owe you an explanation when you see him not fending off the countless girls that go up to him and get their hands on whatever they could; doesn’t owe you an apology when you see him leaning down fondly to kiss someone who isn’t you — someone who isn’t his soulmate.

You would’ve been alone in your booth and the club in general (your soulmate’s out of the equation because he looks like he’s in a different realm entirely) if not for Hoseok, someone who’s perhaps your second best friend right after Jungkook.

It’s merely a coincidence that the both of you are here at the same time, him being the one to easily spot you as he weaves himself in your company seamlessly because he’s been meaning to escape all his frat brothers who annoy him more these days.

“I have something to say to you.”

Hoseok breaks into your worrisome silence, beckoning you over even if the two of you are sat right next to each other with your shoulders bumping.

“No. no. Come closer,” he insists and it makes you roll your eyes at what he could be playing at this time, indulging him by putting the side of your face right against his playfully.

Hoseok’s even more rational and realistic than you could be. In fact, he’s followed your gaze the entire night and he wonders how you haven’t grown tired. He knows about your helpless pining for your soulmate who doesn’t even want to know about you nor your existence, and all he can do is watch.

“You’re insane if you think this whole thing wouldn’t end up anything but extremely painful.”

His words are in a harsh whisper but it feels as if he’s yelled at you right to your ear, making you flinch away from his softly with a defeated pout on your face.

His words come out of nowhere but the rational part of you, the one that disappears whenever you’re vulnerable in this state longing after Jungkook, already knew that you’ve had this coming for a long time.

Hoseok doesn’t sugarcoat his words and it’s what you need almost all of the time. He’s harsh and unforgiving and it reminds you that you have a friend who isn’t Jungkook — someone who isn’t as gentle or kind; someone who grounds you rationally whenever you get too far up your head.

“Let me live, Hobi.”

“What you’re doing isn’t living, Y/N.”

He thinks for a second that he’s being too harsh but he realizes that maybe, just maybe, you need the truth no matter how cruel it could be. He figures that maybe you’d need someone to call you out instead of pitying you over what they could clearly see. “Tell me,” he murmurs, crossing his arms as he looks at you whose eyes are avoiding his gaze.

“Do you live for yourself first?” he nudges you by the shoulder, lightly tapping your ring with his finger. “Or do you live for Jungkook?”

Do you live for yourself first,

or do you live for Jungkook?

You’re dead silent and it’s the type that Hoseok doesn’t want to hear, mumbling to yourself before leaning to his neck to sniff whatever remnant he has on.

“God, what are you on?” you’re deflecting and you know it, cracking your knuckles at the process. “Let me have a hit of it.”

“I’m serious over here.”

Hoseok sees right through you and you feel like crying, recognizing the familiar solemn look on his face because like everyone else who has even the faintest idea of your situation, he pities you.

“And I’m telling you this as someone who cares for you,” he lightly swipes underneath your eyes that are welling up with tears before they even get to fall, effectively prying them out. “Let go of him while you still can.”

“How do I do that?”

You’re breathless in exhaustion but it’s not as if you’ve done anything physically strenuous to be in such a state. You haven’t done anything but it feels as if the wind is knocked out of your lungs and it doesn’t come back to you even if your sail blows.

“How do I do that if Jungkook asks me what do I want for dinner?” there’s trepidation underneath your tone and Hoseok recognizes it, the tremble in your fingers visible even if you have them clenched. “How do I do that if he holds my hand when we cross the street and shields me in crowds?”

“How do you expect me to do that when he calls my parents on weekends and tells them that he’ll always look out for me?”

You’re not scared of letting Jungkook know but rather, you’re scared of your inevitable fall. You’re not scared of the white hot pain you anticipate to feel when the moment finally comes that he says it straight to your face that he doesn’t love you; you’re scared of what happens to the two of you after and what’s left of it.

“How do you expect me to stop loving Jungkook when he acts like he loves me back?”

“He doesn’t.”

“And I know that.”

You’re flawed in the way that you’re self-aware. That you’re painfully mindful of your own emotions and multitudes. You hate that you’re as logical as you are emotional and for once, you just wish you didn’t know better.

You wish that you’re insensitive and reckless. You wish you were more cunning in the sense that you disregard Jungkook completely and stop at nothing to try and get him to look your way with a different gaze.

You wish that you’re anyone but yourself, someone who’s deserving of Jungkook.

“What do I do now, Hobi?” you lean into him because you can’t support yourself and he knows it, the weight of your heart being heavier than your head on his shoulder.

You’re flawed because you suppress a coo at the back of your throat when Jungkook stumbles over to your booth and immediately wraps his arms around you, drunken babbles leaving him as it’s a sign for you to take him home.

You’re flawed because you hear your soulmate speak as you bid goodbye to Hoseok for the night, only smiling when you hear his words. It’s a pain that doesn’t encompass you, rather, it’s a pain that’s hot enough to burn your flesh yet just warm enough to quell the pain in your bones.

“You're my best, best friend in every universe. Y’know that?” he hiccups, eyes completely glazed and rubbed raw as he looks at the side of your face while you haul him to your car. “I hope you know that.”

( ♡ )

Your door opens up before you even realize it.

Actually, Jungkook opens your door before he even realizes it.

He’s woken up in a rush with a single text from his dad that they’re coming over to visit and normally it wouldn’t bother him. Waking up abruptly in the morning isn’t a problem to him and so is making a game plan in cleaning everything up to make sure it’s spotless to his mother’s standards.

What is a problem is that when he entered the bathroom to brush his teeth without a shirt on, he sees the reflection of his hickeys from the night before glaring right at him.

However, what an even bigger problem than that is when he tries to wake you up by knocking on your door with the pleads of helping him cover his marks up, it automatically opens when he twists the knob.

“Y/N, no! Why’s your door unlocked?”

His eyes widen in panic and worry, wondering why it wasn’t even locked in the first place. Better yet, has it never been locked ever since? When he leaves you alone in the apartment, do you go out of your way to unlock the main door that he secures closed on the way out?

“And why aren’t you even moving out of bed when someone’s inside your room? What if it isn’t me? What if it’s someone else who did the exact things I did?”

Jungkook’s more worried than he is mad even if his tone’s jittery, hands on his hips as his mind makes up for the whole nine yards. Seriously, does he regard your safety more than you do with your own? Leaving your door open is beyond unsafe. Were you being more forgetful these days? Does he not look over you enough?

You’re oblivious to his panicked state as you burrow yourself deeper into your sheets, eyes remaining peacefully closed because it doesn’t surprise you anymore when he suddenly inserts his presence into your vicinity.

“But it’s you,” you sleepily mumble, half-coherent with the way you hug your pillow closer. “Aren’t you the one who kept knocking at my door?”

He scoffs because you do make a point even if he refuses to admit it, but it just ticks him in a way that you regard his concern for you so lightly. “That’s different and-…”

“And now you’ve opened it yourself and invited yourself into my room.”

“Yeah and that’s okay because it’s me!” he gestures out but he forgets that you’re not even looking at him, unaware of how he looks genuinely upset and worried at the moment. “But what if it was someone else, hm?”

“Like who, an intruder?” you suggest even if you don’t know where this conversation is taking you, your careless words leaving you before you even realize because you don’t have half the realization to think about them deeper. “You’ll protect me if there is one, right?”

Jungkook freezes in his tracks and he suddenly feels no point in trying to berate you further, the stark suggestion that was only meant to be light-hearted painting him a grave image he wasn’t even trying to conjure, trying not to snowball for the worst possible scenario.

He should always be there for you, that much he knows.

“Fucking idiot, of course I would,” he huffs that you even doubt his prioritization for you and it makes you snort because you clearly hear it, turning to face the other side as you make no move in shooing him away and instead try to go back to sleeping. “But starting now, promise me you’ll lock your doors and wake up immediately when someone knocks, alright? You hear me?”

“Hmm.”

“Cross your heart on it,” he says it out of habit even if he knows you wouldn’t do it anyway, sitting on the vacant side of you bed as he tries to shake you awake. “Anyways, I need a favor from you.”

It’s never been lost on you that unlike every other time, Jungkook wouldn’t willingly come to you this early into the night without needing something from you for his own benefit. You don’t get your hopes up that perhaps this time, he comes to your bed just to hold you in warmth amongst his embrace because it’s something only a fever nap could do for you; clearly not sick enough to see that image.

“What do you need me for now?” your eyes start blinking open as you shift to look straight up at the ceiling, casting a glance on Jungkook who has a sheepish pout on his face.

“Please cover up my hickeys. I’m begging you."

You don’t even flinch once and he’s nervous at how it seems like you didn’t even hear what he said, prompting to explain himself further. “Mom and Dad are visiting and they’re already on the way.”

You’re used to this.

There shouldn’t be any surprise factor to know that the time Jungkook wakes you up outside for the purpose of not making you late to your classes or to your errands, it would be for his sake. He wakes you up for the sake of himself, asking of you to cover up his hickeys because he’s ever the angel to his parents and he can’t do it himself.

Jungkook wakes you up for you to see marks that link him to another woman, even if it’s just for a night, while he covers up the only marks he has of you on his finger and he doesn’t even know it, completely devoid of the only linking thing you have with him.

“Get me my makeup bag.”

He immediately knows where it is and he manages to mumble out a rushed thanks, sprinting back to where you lay. In fact, you have a separate concealer in Jungkook’s shade already that you don’t even need to turn the light on to know it’s a perfect match.

You sit up lazily and cover up his hickeys like it’s routine. You see him everyday as he belongs to everyone but yourself, and the physical proof of it doesn’t hurt you as much as you expected it to be.

He lays down on your lap and neither of you talk.

You skim past the hues of pink and purple on his neck as if you were born simply to see them on your soulmate’s neck, as if you were conditioned all your life to be the one to cover up hickeys on Jungkook’s skin as your sole purpose. You do the process of covering it up over and over again until you get rid of the marks that remind him he isn’t yours at all, right until he sits up to admire your handicraft.

“Woah, it’s like it wasn’t even there! This is so-“

“Now get out.”

Jungkook’s eyes widen as he gets whiplash from your hostile tone, but he probably chalks it up to you being sleepy, him interrupting your rest, and you desperately wanting to get back to it.

He’s out of your room to now clean up the entire place but your tone doesn’t leave him still, making him sigh out loud while he tries not to overthink it.

You’re just sleepy.

You’d never get mad at him.

Jungkook’s eyes blink once, twice as he resumes wiping down the counters, slower and more thoughtful this time.

You’d never get mad at him, right?

( ♡ )

The day is slow and so is the pain in your heart.

You can’t put a finger on it exactly, but being with Jungkook in any other form besides a soulmate doesn’t hurt you as much nowadays. The hurt is there but it’s never really left anyway. The vacuum in the shape of Jungkook from within you has been there for so long that the hurt you feel seems like a routine at this point.

You look for him in the way when there’s a misplaced decoration on the shelf; a single magazine missing amongst a row of books. You look for it, but you come to accept it. You don’t look for Jungkook in the way when you realize that an heirloom is missing from your possession and you tear around the whole place to seek it.

Having Jungkook away from your grasp feels as normal as you have him within yours platonically, the two weighing the same amount of harrowing.

“I have an idea,” Jungkook proposes to you over the couch when he’s shouldered dinner and it’s just yet to arrive, passing the time by being around you even if your attention isn’t on him. “What if you look at my soulmate mark?”

You’ve only been endlessly scrolling through your feed and as much as you expected Jungkook to bother your silence with one conversation or another, you didn’t think it’d be this.

Rarely does it cross your mind nowadays that you’re soulmates before you’re best friends turned roommates. In fact, not once did you wander about him today and admittedly in realization, it scares you before it relieves you.

“What for?”

“Shit and giggles, I think,” he replies with much amusement but the determination in his eyes tell you that he’s more than insistent. “Don’t tell me about it though. Don’t tell me even a single clue.”

You will yourself to look back at your phone, to ignore him as if he hasn’t said the stupidest yet simultaneously brightest proposal he’s ever given you because it’s too sudden. You’ve waited for years but now that Jungkook’s asking you to look at his mark in behalf of him, simply for shit and giggles, you worry that it’s too sudden. Too early. That the moment you’ve waited for years is too abrupt and now you’d rather wait for another lifetime for it.

“What’re you doing this for?”

You repeat the question again but you’re equally as serious the first time around, seeing his brows furrow because he feels like you’ve changed the atmosphere without him knowing.

“I suddenly got curious.”

“You don’t get curious.”

“I know, I just get easily influenced,” Jungkook sheepishly admits, scratching the back of his head because it seems to him that you’re cornering him and shutting him down for no reason at all. He doesn’t necessarily know why he feels intimidated by you, but it doesn’t mean he wouldn’t try to ease the tension by explaining himself. “Remember when I asked you to cover up my hickeys last week?”

“What about it?” your eyes narrow in genuine wonder, prompting you to think just how long Jungkook’s been meaning to ask you this.

“You weren’t wearing a bra that time.”

The words tumble out of Jungkook’s mouth continuously and he only has the mind to look embarrassed by it when you sputter out loud, averting his gaze to suppress a laugh,

“Jungkook-!” your pupils dart wildly, appalled and embarrassed at the same time when you defensively cross your arms across your chest even if what he’s pertaining to has long been finished. “Of course I wasn’t wearing a bra! It was 5 AM and I was still asleep when you kept knocking on my door!”

“And I wasn’t looking!” he defends himself with a laugh, head automatically shaking as he tries to reach out to you but you only swat him away. “I just glanced once because I realized it but I didn’t look again, I swear!”

“Well sometimes, you should keep your mouth shut!” you squeak, rolling your eyes as you try to get away from his further by moving to the opposite end of the couch. “I would’ve been able to live in peace without knowing you saw my boobs through my shirt.”

“It’s normal! Just like you seeing me without a shirt! We live together, stupid. It was bound one way or another,” he argues, earning yet another frustrated groan from you.

You power through the embarrassment because you’d look like such a sore loser if you walk away from him now, hiding your face to a throw pillow as Jungkook gathers his wits while he tries to get closer to you, abandoning his spot on the other end of the couch.

“Not only weren’t you wearing a bra-”

“Watch it,” you seethe when he gets close enough for you to flick his forehead harshly, earning a whine from him in the midst of laughing as he gets choked up.

His cheeks are tinted pink and it’s clear he can’t breathe well with how much he’s entertained, clearing his throat a few times and having to look away from you because your face alone apparently sends him into a fit of giggles.

You think this is the end of it. You think Jungkook’s effectively forgotten about his previous proposal and you’d be able to end the night with a good dinner and no confrontations at all, but your expectation gets spoiled as soon as you started hoping.

“You weren’t wearing your ring too.”

Your heart drops before you even get to digest all of the words, the hurt hitting you before the impending realization.

“W-what?”

Jungkook’s face twists in worry to see you so shaken up when he barely did anything, certain that you wouldn’t look this pale over a few minutes of teasing and banter. He tilts his head at you and it prompts you to straighten up and fix the worry in your features, good enough for him to continue.

“Don’t worry, I didn’t look. Besides, your mark was turned away from me the entire time because you were dabbing on my neck and I was getting sleepy while you did it,” he shrugs carelessly and it’s the first time you could physically feel the relief in your shoulder that melts all away the tension, the feeling so fluid that it feels warm.

“It was still dark too,” he adds in recollection, a faint smile on his face as he gestures to you and motions at your chest vaguely. “All I saw were just like… peaks and shadows.”

“Shut the fuck up, Jungkook,” you snap but there’s no real bite to it. In fact, it even sounds sweet but he doesn’t know how to read between the lines and therefore nestles to your side in rising worry.

“I’m sorryyy,” he drawls out and the moment he feels you pat his nape with your confirmation that it’s okay and doesn’t really matter in the first place, he springs up back to his straight posture against the cushions of the couch, an eager smile evident.

“Anyways, that’s why you have me wondering what’s underneath my ring,” he connects seamlessly, obviously unaware of the way you’ve tensed up beside him. “Now come on, it’s okay! Think of this as me making it up to you. You can go look.”

Jungkook turns his position on the couch to face you, his left hand raised right in front of you and he’s laughing with unknown nerves, the feeling being akin to being tickled because he anticipates it fully, but the sensation feels different every time.

Your mouth dries when you’re faced with the same signet ring that you wear yourself, right on Jungkook’s digit. The shiny silver stares back at you in the eye and you can’t take your gaze away from it, the familiar piece of jewelry looking more unrecognizable the longer you look at it.

You don’t know what you expect from it when he teasingly starts to pull his ring up without any big movements to reveal the ink that’s underneath, but as much as you don’t know what you want to see, the trepidation blooms fully in your chest for you to have the mind in stopping him.

“Don’t.”

Jungkook’s confused and shocked to why you suddenly refused, recalling that just two seconds ago, you were all for his fun little proposal but now you’re no longer on-board.

He’s familiar with the conflict in your eyes, he just doesn’t recognize what’s it supposed to be. He sees the cracks of your hurt, he just doesn’t know the focus of it,

“Why not?” he frowns, genuinely curious to see you avoiding his gaze.

“I shouldn’t be the first one to see it.”

“I trust you, though.”

It’s what hurts all the more because he trusts you to see the initials of what would lead him to his soulmate, to you, but not in looking at you face-to-face for you to become the very thing he doesn’t want.

“Maybe next time, Jungkook.”

The mood is somber and he doesn’t know what to make of it besides the fact that you worry him deeply, bending downwards to have a glance at your face. “Do you wanna talk about it?”

He looks down on his ring but now he suddenly feels off-put looking at it, obscuring his mark that makes him curious.

“Does it have to do with your own soulmate not wanting you?” he jokes around lightly to ease the mood and if only he knew that he’s hurting you right where it hurts, he would’ve shut his mouth int the first place.

You’re bitter, harshly biting the inside of your cheek to prevent yourself from crying, voice straining as you try to bring back the playful atmosphere.

“I’ll have you know, I’m easy to love, Jungkook. Try it sometime."

He giggles right to your face — laughs at your hurt, right to your vulnerability and the little pride you have left.

“Silly,” Jungkook ruffles your hair in much amusement, eyes crinkling in giddiness because you’ve bounced back from the minor inconvenience in his eyes just as quick. “I can’t love you.”

( ♡ )

Jungkook’s family has a new house.

What’s different this time is that the house they had built isn’t for business purposes to be occupied by long-time tenants nor short-term guests. The spacious three-floored house is wide in technicality but it feels quaint and warm with all the furniture and personality inside it. Most vacation houses and cottages they had built are neutral, the life of the space completely dependent on its future inhabitants. But this house of theirs is clearly their own, the evidence of the three-member family visible from floor to ceiling.

Your family’s at the top of the guest list for their housewarming and it’d be a lie to say that you don’t feel fond seeing your parents and older siblings’ reaction to the welcome that the Jeon family gives. They’re nice hosts with the way they usher their visitors to the catering tables but they’re even more warm and familial with the way they give you your plates themselves, taking you by the arm as they tour your family around their house way ahead of everyone.

Mr. Jeon gushes to your dad how they have a pond out back and invites him to accompany him next week to buy fish for their deck, Jungkook’s dad insisting that he drives the two of them and they can go for street food right after.

Jungkook takes pride in touring around your mom and your older siblings by proudly introducing them to the other visitors, all along the lines of how you’re all basically like family ever since they’ve moved in next door to your family, their humble beginnings in the form of their original house where they started from scratch.

You stand meekly by the corner, against one of the towering pillars as you watch everyone interact with each other. One thing about the Jeon family is that they’re just the type of successful no one could ever be bitter of because they’re immensely kind and genuine, not a trace of bitterness being seen in any of the faces you see.

You know the last thing you should be feeling at the moment is displacement because as far as you knew, your family’s the talk of the household right after the hosts’. You should know out of all people that you belong in this environment that’s nothing short of familial and supportive, but it’s unavoidable.

It’s unavoidable because you see exactly why Jungkook doesn’t need you.

It’s inevitable to feel out of place because in yet another house that serves as a home for Jungkook, you realize why he finds no need nor significance in having a soulmate because he has everything he needs and more.

He has everything that completes him and balances him perfectly. He stands on his own two feet and is able to be happy without knowing who the universe has assigned for him. He lives and breathes without knowing you and it’s perfectly okay.

It’s perfectly okay for him to not want you and only live for himself because he doesn’t owe you at all.

Jungkook doesn’t owe you the love that you give him and that’s perfectly okay.

Everything should be perfectly okay because he is and yet you don’t know why your eyes are downcast despite everyone else around moving on without you. No one owes you anything and you should know better than to even voice the tiniest bit of sentiments you’ve been repressing all this time because the hurt you feel should only be yours.

All the while, you’re oblivious to how you’ve gained the attention of the woman who knows Jungkook the most before you.

“It’s Jungkook, isn’t it?”

Mrs. Jeon stands before you and your eyes flit to hers in an instant, pupils trembling to see what she could possibly mean.

You think you could salvage the pitiful situation she’s caught you in because of course, there’s no possible way that she could know, right? Even your own family doesn’t know of the initials that are inked on your finger and they’re your own flesh and blood. If anything, they should be the one who’d figure it out first.

The lie you were supposed to tell her gets caught in your throat because from her gaze alone, the same gaze you receive when Hoseok speaks you the truths you always try and make excuses for, you know that she knows.

Mrs. Jeon sees right through you before Jungkook and the realization crosses her face that the two of you only stand parallel.

“I’m sorry,” she apologizes, the dots connecting in her head much faster even if it’s years worth of all her intuitions, the gravity of it only hitting her now. “I’m so, so sorry.”

“There’s nothing to be sorry for.”

You quickly shake your head even if she holds your hands in hers, her eyes wide and glassy to see her son’s soulmate in this light. She’s always treated you as a daughter and at first, she thought it’s because she only has a son. That maybe it’s because Jungkook’s an only child and she’s always wanted a daughter figure in her life. That maybe, she just happens to love you more than any of the daughters her friends have because she’s known you the longest.

She feels so remorseful that she should’ve listened to her instincts more and not just glaze over the fact that perhaps, you were her son’s soulmate. She feels that maybe she could’ve protected you better by saying that sooner or later, Jungkook would outgrow his phase of sleeping around.

She’s not blind to see the makeup that covers her son’s neck whenever she comes over, no matter how seamless it is. However, she’s blind enough to not see that it’s you all this time and how you’ve been hurting far longer than you should’ve.

“But what about you? What happens to you?”

“I’ll be okay, mom.”

She told you to call her that, much like how your mother insisted that Jungkook calls her that too. You reassure her endlessly that she shouldn’t feel sorry at all because it’s no one’s fault, and if it’s anyone whose blame should befall on, it should be you.

“Why did it have to be you?” her lip blubbers and it reminds you of her son, seeing her clench her eyes at the second wave of realization that you must be so hurt beyond salvation. “Oh god, I’m so sorry, Y/N.”

You don’t deserve the apology but hearing it makes you awed, your own tears welling at your eyes because for once, even if it’s the person you’ve least expected to say it to you, you feel seen. You feel remorse and pity without being looked down on; something you haven’t been able to experience in a long time.

“You deserve someone better than Jungkook.”

She looks up as if it would resolve anything. Mrs. Jeon looks like she’s begging for the universe to befall and it catches you off-guard with how she’s hugging you so tightly.

If she prayed to the universe for a short second, then the universe must’ve loved her enough to grant whatever it is that she wished for. The universe doesn’t befall on you but rather, it marches up to you with a furrow in his brow and his jaw clenched.

“What do you mean better than me?”

Jungkook didn’t mean to eavesdrop in the first place but he couldn’t hold himself back from inserting himself into the conversation that two of the most important women in his life were having, thinking it would be something he’s familiar with given the way the two of you looked shellshocked at each other.

“What are you talking about?”

He harshly whispers and neither of you meet his desperate gaze, not one bit of reassurance trying to confirm nor deny what he had just heard. He looks at his mother clutching your hands, thumb particularly rubbing your signet ring like how she would with a wound to soothe.

The realization and the heaviness that come with it are unlike no other.

“In my room now.”

Jungkook seethes as he doesn’t wait for an answer, pulling you desperately upstairs. He’s fuming even if his grasp on your wrist is gentle. He’s furious at you even if he nudges you inside his room, closing the door behind him firmer than he’d ever think of.

“Jungkook-“

“You are so fucking evil.”

What you could only see at the surface is that he’s mad, the maddest you’ve ever seen him. You don’t know if he’s mad at you directly but you feel the bite of his words nonetheless, catching you in surprise that you stutter.

“W-what?”

His expression can’t be gauged and neither can he discern what he feels. All he feels is that he’s in the dark and he’s disoriented with how blinding the light is that’s focused on him now, voice turning hoarse with how overwhelmed he feels.

“How long have you known? How long were you lying to me, huh?” he has his hands on his hips, looking at you as if he’s never seen you before and all he knows is that he’s angry at you. It feels like he doesn’t know you besides the outline of you that blindsides him. “How many people know that it’s me? How did it happen that my mother knew that I’m your soulmate before I did?”

You’re mad at him too. You’re angry at him because he speaks down to you in the way as if he doesn’t know you and all you’ve done to him is hurt him when not once did you betray him to be treated hostile as such. All you’ve done is give and it feels like Jungkook’s asking you to give him the satisfaction of being angry at you, one that he feels entitled to.

“I didn’t let you know because you didn’t want to. You’ve said it yourself a hundred times!”

“How would I have known that my fucking soulmate was standing in front of me the whole time?” he raises his voice, eyes widening. “Almost my whole life, Y/N! You knew and you didn’t even question my beliefs once?”

“And I know you don’t love me for almost as long as my whole life too. Even if I told you, it wouldn’t have made a difference. You wanted to be free and I let you!”

He scoffs, throwing his head back to mock you. He’s never the one to cry when arguing but the frustration wells up in his eyes because it all feels too much.

“So now you’re holding your heroic act against me? You already know how I feel about soulmates. You already know what I don’t feel about you! You could’ve just left and I would’ve understood!”

“No, Jungkook. You wouldn’t have understood,” your finger points at him and you don’t feel the slightest bit of remorse that you’ve offended him. “You wouldn’t have understood because not once were you in my shoes. I didn’t leave you because you didn’t want me to leave!”

Jungkook would make you cross your heart multiple times for you to never leave him. You were older than him by a few months and at one point, Jungkook must’ve looked up to you. He would’ve made you cross your heart to not leave him in the playground as kids and to not leave him to eat alone at lunch as students. He made you cross your heart to not leave him for longer than necessary as roommates, and cross your heart to lock your doors so he’d be able to sleep securely at night that nothing and nobody can harm you.

“You’re right, I wouldn’t have wanted you to leave,” he grits his teeth, looking at you menacingly with stray tears on his cheeks. “But when I said that, I meant that in the sense that you shouldn’t ever leave your best friend.”

“You could’ve left me as a soulmate and I would be okay, Y/N,” Jungkook emphasizes and it’s not lost on you what he’s asking from you now. “But you’re still here! You’re still around me and it’s like you’re expecting me to love you back!”

You’re flawed but you know better than to let Jungkook construct his own truths that the both of you know are lies, persistently shaking your head as your eyes prick in frustration.

“I would never force you to love me back and you know it, Jungkook.”

You mean it with every fiber in your being because it’s tattooed into your mind that he doesn’t owe you anything at all. You love Jungkook simply because you do and you don’t expect it to be requited.

You mean it genuinely when you say that not once have you ever pressured him to love you back but it falls on deaf ears because he goes on, no matter how much you try to get it through his mind.

“I don't have to love you. Goddamn it Y/N, atleast give me a choice here. Don't just chain me to you!"

You resist the urge to grip at your hair as you cry, sobbing frustratedly. His words no longer hurt but what instead hurts you is that he makes you out for someone who isn’t you, the little pride you have left forcing you to stand up for yourself and become rational. “Hey, hey. Listen. Two people can be soulmates and not be in love with each other, y'know? That's possible."

“It’s not-“

“I’m already in love with you, Jungkook! That's the problem!”

You burst as you raise your voice and the little moment of calm gets washed away because Jungkook retaliates even louder, his chest heaving as he points at himself.

“I’m the problem now? You've been begging me all this time to love you back, and now I’m the problem?"

“You're not getting my point, Jungkook!"

“I’m really not getting your point here because you're making it sound like it's my fault that you love me!"

You try to breathe deeply, running your hands through your hair as the words slip out of you. “Maybe it's your fault, have you ever thought about that? You act as if you love me-"

“What the fuck? I’m kind, Y/N. Being kind is different from-"

“Best friends don’t-“

The words get lost on your tongue.

You stop yourself and it’s as if one seed of clarity plants itself in your mind, the sudden silence making Jungkook cease the heaving of his chest as none of you speak a word.

You’re flawed but this is the only time you feel that it’s fine to be as such, figuring that if you want to salvage the tiny bit of whatever compassion you have for yourself, you should no longer try. The tensions melts away from your shoulders and Jungkook feels the way the atmosphere once again changes before he knows it, wide eyes trying to gauge what exactly is happening.

“I’ll stop — cross my heart.”

( ♡ )

Jungkook doesn’t want to lose you.

It’s your university’s semestral break for the holidays and throughout the entire time, you haven’t contacted him.

You don’t contact him even when it’s the day before Christmas and there’s two minutes left on the clock before it’s the 25th.

The two of you are apart this time. You’re in your childhood home while his family stays over in their new vacation house. His parents miss your family beyond measure but they’d overheard your fight and decided that maybe having a different celebration this year, one that’s only the three of them even if it’s not as boisterous and fun being with your household, is for the better.

The wound’s still fresh. The sting’s still there and it’s barely healing.

That’s why Jungkook sends you a quick series of texts before his family feasts without you.

i’m sorry for the things i’ve said, i was really rude

i don’t want to lose you

happy holidays btw, we miss you

see you after break :)

( ♡ )

It’s like it never happened.

It’s like Jungkook didn’t cry himself to sleep and feel extremely lethargic because as soon as break was over and the two of you are back into your shared apartment, you act normal.

You act as if nothing changed and it drives him out of his mind for you to be so casual despite everything because it’s like this time, he’s the only who’s affected by the entire situation that’s unfolded. The two of you’ve already exchanged apologies and reassurances that you’d move on collectively but now that he thinks about it, Jungkook never should’ve agreed to move on.

He never should’ve agreed to move on because out of the two of you, you’re the only one who isn’t on a standstill.

He’s distraught that even if it’s the same scenario and scenery before the two of you even blew over, you move on from him faster than he thought you could. Jungkook almost cried himself to sleep when you weren’t home by 9 PM from your classes and you looked genuinely confused to see him pacing by the kitchen, waiting for you to come home.

He feels like he’s losing it by the minute when you wake up by yourself and not without his incessant knocking that you’d be late for class if you stay in bed for a minute longer.

His heart feels like it’s about to break down when you don’t call him over to say hi whenever your parents call you, only getting to hear your conversations through the door as he suddenly feels that he’s excluded from all the things he shares with you.

He reminds himself that he wanted this. He reminds himself that he said he wanted you to leave during his family’s housewarming party, that he then retracts his statement and said he didn’t want to lose you over the holidays, and that all throughout the years he’s been with you — he’s never wanted you.

Jungkook reminds himself that he’s still with you.

He’s still with you, that much he knows.

He just isn’t sure if you’re still with him.

( ♡ )

Jungkook didn’t expect for this to hurt so bad.

He didn’t expect to be so lost into his thoughts that he couldn’t sleep in his room and marches right outside the living room wearing a new pair of socks that he didn’t expect to be this slippery, not registering into his mind that he’s done household chores the whole day to keep his mind preoccupied and that the hardwood floors are squeaky clean with wax.

He didn’t expect that he’d slip and fall on his arm painfully that it makes him wince, groaning at the impact of his body weight crushing his arm and for such a striking pain to travel to his elbow all the way to the tips of his fingers.

Jungkook didn’t expect for it to hurt this much because you don’t come out of your room to help him and he can’t take it, frustrated as he can’t get up that he does nothing but yell out your name multiple times.

All his calls for you effectively summoned you out but you’re more confused than you are panicked, a gasp leaving your lips when you see him lying in pain on the floor.

“What happened to you?” you ask in worry as you try to pull him up without hurting him, making him wince while trying to answer your question nonetheless.

“Huh?” he lets you carry him up to sit him down the couch for the meantime, assessing just how bad his fracture looks like to see if you’d have to drive him to the hospital. “What do you mean? Didn’t you feel the pain?”

Jungkook knows about the red string of pull and his eyes blink twice in confusion because you only realize what he’s talking about belatedly, the genuine confusion in your face making him swallow the lump in his throat.

“Oh. I didn't feel it. There wasn't a pull."

“Stop joking with me."

He clenches his jaw at how you could manage to play with him over such an important matter, even more baffled when you defensively shake your head and even breathlessly laugh.

“I’m not, Kook! I swear, I really didn't."

“Bullshit,” he rolls his eyes casually, deadpanning at you with a gasp emerging from his lips. “You knew I broke my arm and intentionally didn't help me!”

“Jungkook, I swear on my life,” he sees you hold up your hand in the air in a promise, tiny giggles of disbelief leaving you as he genuinely can’t understand where exactly is the humor you find in this.

He purses his lips and tries to look deeper for anything in your eyes that give you away even the slightest bit, pointing at your ring. “Take it off."

He watches intently the way surprise sweeps across your features and he thinks for a second that you’re just lying to him — you wouldn’t really take off your ring because doing so would confirm his hopes that it’s his same initials with the same vivid shade of red, right?

But you do it nonetheless.

Truth be told you’ve only removed your ring once since the incident because you didn’t want to be reminded of whose initials were underneath it, but it surprises you that your compliance gets the better of you and you take it off from him.

Jungkook’s stare falters to see the very thing he’s asked for.

What he could only make out clearly now is the J in the middle of his first and last initial, the two other letters clearly not as prominent. You’re shocked to see the difference from when you last saw your mark, the first J and K by your ring finger fading in contrast.

“You can’t — is this true?” he finds himself swallowing the lump in his throat painfully, taking your finger into his own hands that he barely winces using his other arm, rubbing his thumb against your skin to see if it was just some trick. “Surely you can’t spell my name without the jeon and the kook, right?”

His breathing is too heavy and you don’t speak either. The two of you have heard about this once when you were children from both of your mothers, all blissfully too young and unaware to consider the possibility that it might just happen to the two of you.

“About the mark-…”

“My mom said-…”

The two of you pipe up at the same time but Jungkook lets you go first because even if you haven’t spoken at the same time as he did, he wouldn’t have been able to finish what he was supposed to say.

You say your next words honestly, in a gentle and soft voice but it lands loud and disruptive to Jungkook’s ears, making him want to clamp his ears shut because he refuses to believe.

“It could be because the universe is reassigning me a new soulmate.”

“Y-yeah,” he clears his throat as if it would stop the tears that are threatening to fall on his cheeks, looking down on his lap as he unconsciously hunches on himself. “I remember our moms saying this when we were kids.”

“Mhmm,” you hum in recollection, pointing to him eagerly because the two of you are at the same page. “I asked my mom about a week ago then an hour later, I got put into a groupchat with all the moms of the friends that I have."

Jungkook weakly snorts to match your energy because he’s weak. He’s too weak to raise his head to face how you’re so nonchalant about this and this time, it’s him who’s hurting so badly.

“Everyone's bets are on PJM — Park Jimin! Who would’ve known, right? The J initial makes sense."

Jimin, a family friend of a family friend.

Jimin, the one kid in preschool that always wowed the parents and the teachers because he talks like how a fourth-grader would and knows how to do addition with the carrying.

Jimin, a distant friend who studied abroad for college and whose news broke out that he’s coming back home during his break and plans to settle here in your city.

Jimin, someone who’s theorized to replace Jungkook.

“Don't even joke about that. I’m serious,” he mumbles under his breath and the croak of his voice gives him away, suddenly standing up from the couch and forgetting about his physical pain entirely, bidding you a quiet good night that he could only know is not something that he’d be getting underneath this dark.

“I’m gonna go to sleep."

( ♡ )

Jungkook wishes that his eyesight wasn’t so clear.

He wishes he didn’t heed his mother’s warnings of not looking at screens for too long too closely and his father’s insistence that he takes his vegetables and vitamins.

He wishes that his vision is poor because in that way, he wouldn’t be able to notice how the silver that’s against your skin looks different; how he couldn’t tell that it’s shine isn’t the same that he’s used to seeing and how it’s no longer the signet ring that looks like the same piece that he wears on your ring finger.

“Did you change your ring?"

He asks you one morning when you’re making breakfast. He memorizes seeing the furrow in your brows and the realization in your face as you look down on your hand, his words clicking into your head in understanding.

“Oh yeah, I did.”

Your ring’s now of a thicker design with intricate details and swirls, the band of it seemingly molded into decorative crosses. It looks heavy and of high-quality and Jungkook’s certain that your ring’s more expensive this time, clueless to where and when you got it.

The groove of the silver reminds him of the letter P, and his mind goes to Jimin’s family name instantaneously — and it makes Jungkook pray that he’d rather have his vision tainted than to ever see it on your skin.

( ♡ )

“Where are you going this early in the morning?”

Jungkook can’t bear to sleep in his bedroom anymore nowadays because it feels to confined, not wanting to be alone with his thoughts and insecurities which is why he chooses to sleep in the living room where it’s open and he has everywhere else to look at besides his ceiling.

He hasn’t even been sleeping well in the first place which is why he’s alert from his shallow nap when your door clicks open and he sees you already bathed and dressed.

“My dad told me to join him fishing,” you answer when you move on from the surprise he’s given you, releasing the hand from your chest as you calm down. “He’s fishing with Jimin’s dad.”

You’re too busy packing snacks that you don’t register how there’s pillows and blankets on the couch because Jungkook sleeps out here nowadays, compared to your assumptions that he’s just gaming or doing his assignments. Your back is turned to him which is why you don’t notice his face that looks crestfallen at your further explanation, heart sinking in thought.

“Oh,” he stabilizes his voice as best as he could, eyes set at the back of your head as he tries not to give himself away. “Would Jimin be there?”

“Not sure. I’ll see when I get there.”

He nods once, biting on his lip as he tries again.

“Is my dad coming with?”

“O-oh,” the realization crosses your mind that your dad’s companion when it comes to fishing and perhaps any other activity is Mr. Jeon, only hitting you now that you haven’t heard the mention of his name. “I honestly don’t know.”

That’s the thing of both your dads and Jungkook aches at the thought if his time is over. If his family’s time is over with yours. If it’s too late and the ink on your finger can no longer be traced back to him.

If it’s still him.

“Drive safe, m’kay? Call me when you need me.”

You don’t approach him for a goodbye hug and he feels too odd to only keep to himself as you leave out the door, not looking back even once.

Call me even if you don’t need me.

The words only remain on his tongue because speaking it out loud is pointless. It’s pathetic to be said out in the open because you aren’t there for him to look like a fool in front of. He looks pathetic as he waits for you.

It’s because you don’t call him throughout the day to ask if he’s already brought out the meat to defrost for his lunch or what he wants for dinner because you’re ordering on the way home. It’s because you don’t tell him to text you repeatedly so you wouldn’t fall asleep in traffic and miss out on your dad’s banter. It’s because even if he doesn’t need anything from you; even if you aren’t willing to give and he’s eager to take —

Jungkook will always need you.

( ♡ )

The pain Jungkook feels in his bones simmers before it bubbles over.

It marinates and lulls into his skin warmly before it stings. It’s a soothing type of heat that he mistakes for tension before it starts to sting. The pain he feels in his heart all the way down to the pit of his stomach stings before it boils and bubbles at his skin.

The pain he feels burns him unlike no other.

It’s the type of hurt he feels that no matter how much he rubs at his skin and cries his eyes out, it doesn’t relieve him even the slightest bit. He doesn’t feel the calmness when he goes through every single thing that used to soothe him before, every chance at salvation only for the pain to burn deeper making him more frustrated than the last.

Jungkook cries his eyes out every night and he thinks he’s exhausted all the tears out of himself because he finds himself knocking on your door, waiting for you to grant him entrance as he keeps his breathing at bay.

It’s late at night when you’re buried into doing your requirements that you tumble out of your chair to open the door for Jungkook, figuring that it must be an emergency with the way his knocks are desperate.

His eyes land on you the moment you open the door for him, words crawling out of his mouth as he pleads.

“Let me kiss you."

He’s no stranger to the confusion in your face and it feels as if nothing from the two of you would surprise each other at this point. He knows you’re tired and busy but he can’t stop himself to just reserve what he feels tonight and save it for the morning.

Your mouth flounders in wonder, closing it when you figure that nothing else would be lost from you.

You let Jungkook kiss you.

You taste as sweet as Jungkook thought for you to be and more and he cries. He cries as you allow him to kiss you for the first time and let him knock his forehead against yours as his cheeks are damp with despair, eyes looking down on your finger instinctively.

You know exactly what he’s looking at and it makes you sigh solemnly, pressing your knuckles against your sheets so he wouldn’t be able to see.

“Jungkook-…”

Jungkook refuses to give up because this time, he interrupts you with an even deeper kiss that you accidentally moan into, lost into your senses by the surprise that it makes your eyes close.

He tastes you deeper and longer and he feels like he can’t breathe, inhales feeling heavier and his exhales being fewer that you have to put a hand on his chest to nudge him away from you, a pitiful look spanning across your eyes that makes him shut his.

“Kissing me harder isn't gonna help.”

His initials on your finger don’t magically turn more vibrant, more alive. He thinks he’s exhausted every single tear he could possibly cry but it’s seemingly not over, sobbing into his hands right in front of you.

“Why are you not freaked out that your mark's disappearing?! It's changing! I-it might not even be me anymore!”

Jungkook sobs brokenly when he used to not be able to even have his voice tremble at your presence. His shoulders hunch and give out and you have no choice but to catch him with your hands, fearing that he’d tumble out of the edge of your bed and fall on the floor.

“I thought you wanted this. I’m not consciously controlling this, Jungkook. It's just the same when you had no control of your mark not appearing on you."

His words haven’t left you but so is the remaining little love you have for him, knowing realistically that a single night of confrontation isn’t enough to undo years of loving.

“It's on me now. I-It's showing up on me, but it's disappearing from you."

His sobs wrack his own body and you think for a moment that he’s about to pass out with how much he coughs from getting choked up, springing more tears into his eyes as he feels like puking.

“You started to accept it when I started revoking it."

You mumble to yourself in realization and what pains him is that he’s heard it loud and clear, crumpling into your figure as you unconsciously realize that your hand soothes his back.

Jungkook cries the most in his lifetime, tucking his face into your shirt as he shakes his head back and forth like it was a nightmare he’s just forced to live out, words repeating over and over again.

“Don't shut me out."

He clings onto you more than he’s ever had.

Jungkook looks for you in everything and tries to weasel his way into every day that passes, not the least bit of embarrassment creeping up to him on how he looks like a fool every time you leave him hanging and alone.

He apologizes to you day and night until you grow tired of him; until you roll your eyes at him to give it a rest and just shut up at that point onwards.

He endures the hurt and the rejection you give him over and over again; not even going up to par with half of the hurt he’s unknowingly given you all this time.

Jungkook knows he’s flawed — but he’s certain that he’s not flawed enough to stop trying.

He wakes up to the morning light and goes to sleep at the evening glow with only the prayer that he becomes better, better enough to be deserving of you and better enough to be someone the universe would shift connections for.

He’s flawed, but not flawed enough to think that you owe him your love, regardless of his efforts.

The days are warmer and the gaps are fuller when there’s an incessant knocking on your door. The lights are softer and the nights are kinder when there’s a figure that wedges itself beside your bed, a quiet hum to his voice.

“I told you to start locking your doors.”

Jungkook feels the tiny exhale of breath that leaves you before it turns into a giggle, hugging your pillow closer.

“But it’s you.”

He smiles.

“But it’s me.”

Jungkook lies next to you a little closer, his arms bigger compared to the last months that he now manages to cage you fully and have his hands be able to cup yours without having to stretch further.

There’s nothing cool to the touch because nowadays, you let your ring finger breathe as much as he lets his own mark to be seen.

“There are three types of love, y’know?” he hums to your ear when he knows you’re just about to be lulled back to your sleep, able to see you clearly in the dark because no matter what light the both if you are underneath in, he only sees you.

“I was your first, right? Jimin's the second, I’m sure,” he breathily laughs, taking away the hair from your nape because he knows that it bothers you. “I can be the third. I-I can be your third love. I’ll work for it."

For only a second too long that it’s quiet, your voice cutting through the air.

“You can't be my third love, Jungkook,” you hum just as long as his heart stops beating. “You're my only love."

Your eyes are still closed when you silently profess the love that’s never left you, oblivious to how Jungkook is as stiff as concrete behind you that you feel his shoulders lose the hurt immediately. “I’ve loved you three times through."

Jungkook could only hope that it’s not the sleep talking.

He knows you’re real beyond anything and anyone. You’re tangible and fragile and he’s come to learn it a thousand times more. “I’ll love you three times more."

For the longest time on end did Jungkook feel that he’s been falling but the impact never comes. He would’ve wanted to feel it, but either way, he’d know that it would be fine. That he would be fine. That the two of you will be fine and it’s you who he entrusts to spend all of his infinites with, no matter the hurt.

“I love you more than you'll ever know.”

souvenir

pairing: yoongi x reader

wordcount: 3k

glimpse: shouldn’t this be the part where you tell him not to stay out too late?

alternatively, yoongi thinks you hate him because you don’t coddle him after a fight.

[ So Much Pining but they’re already in a relationship lol, some angst from a lil fight, yoongi likes being chased but u don’t indulge him this time, 10/10 wholesome ]

notes: a little something as i come back to writing <3 this is a new fic universe altogether and may be a slice of life series :O

as always, lmk what you think <3 send in feedback n love to my askbox anytime!! even replying to this post sends me over the moon :)

Yoongi relishes in being difficult.

He’s difficult in the way that he’s stubborn for whatever it is, no matter how low he could stoop. It’s definitely a working progress, but your boyfriend just stillhasn’t shaken the urge to always have the last say.

It wasn’t a deep control thing, honestly — Yoongi just really loves pushing your buttons. 

If Yoongi could find a route to piss you off, he’d take a million little detours in the process just for you to take the cake by the end of it. When you present to him a simple yes or no question, he’d find a way to shift the topic altogether for your conversation to go absolutely nowhere.

He’s annoying, there’s really no doubt about it. It was a learning curve at first because seeing your then-boyfriend (now your husband) become snarky at you for surprisingly no reason at all wasn’t exactly the best feeling. All it took was a simple call to Jin, Yoongi’s closest friend, to make you realize that he was just being playful. Your boyfriend being a brat to you, simply put into words, is his love language.

It’s the tiny accumulative moments where he purposely irritates you that in hindsight, it’s become oddly endearing. 

When you pick where to order take-out because Yoongi keeps saying whatever, he whines to no end once the food arrives because apparently, it’s not what he had in mind. You used to be so pissed about it that you’ll order what he wants, but nowadays, you just tell him to suck it up and put more food on his plate.

When you do all the laundry in one go (no, the colors don’t bleed together) and Yoongi insists that you do separate batches for each color that he could enumerate, you would try and appease him by pretending to separate each one. Now, all that Yoongi gets is a high-pitched sarcastic compliment for knowing all his colors.

Whatever Yoongi purposely gave you to incite a reaction, it all melted into your understanding that this was just him. You’re no longer affected by the tiny little things because weirdly enough, they no longer serve its purpose of annoying you. 

It’s just like taking care of Ginger, the spoiled little family cat you grew to take care of back in your childhood home. When she was still a kitten, she’d purposely go up your shelves, look at you in the eye before dropping an item, and you’re leaping after the orange devil to reprimand her. When she became an adult, she still had the same annoying tendencies, and yet you evolved enough not to even bat an eye when she does it now.

Yoongi being annoying to you now isn’t the same thing of him being annoying to you back then. What you used to hate, you now tolerate. What used to piss you off, now makes you endeared. When your husband pushes your buttons now, you’re reminded of how much more mischievous he used to be and the memories that came with it.

This is now your peak — there’s really nothing Yoongi could do that make you fazed anymore.

In a great bout of karma, this is Yoongi’s trough. 

You barely give him an adverse reaction nowadays and that scares him right to his core because you used to be soenthusiastic over him. There’d be days where he picks fights intentionally and you’d spend the whole night trying to make it up to him, even if he necessarily wasn’t in the right.

Yoongi thinks that he’s witnessing himself being old news right in front of you and it scares him. 

You’re more well-versed when it comes to this. You’re the more attentive, more vocal lover between the two of you. You’re the one who can read minds and interpret actions. You’re the one who tends to be more confrontational and he’s the passive one. You’re the one who makes sure that a night wouldn’t pass without the two of you making up.

Yoongi, who thought this was the best thing he’s ever thought of until twenty minutes ago, decides to rekindle your romance by picking a fight with you.

Twenty minutes later, he’s never regretted a decision more in his life.

“I’m going out.” 

He announces as the last resort, head pounding because the fight became bigger than necessary. It’s 9 in the evening and he isn’t even dressed to be going out, his matching pajamas with you too soft and too worn to be even seen wearing while driving in the comfort of his own car.

Yoongi feels tears pricking in his eyes because clearly you laid onto him just as much as he made digs at you tonight, but what’s even more hurtful is that looking at you now, you don’t even look as startled as he is.

Maybe it’s just his mind. His silly, smooth, little mind that thinks the fight was bigger than it actually was. It was just a tiny argument about him baselessly accusing you of not putting in any effort that went off-topic for a brief second. In reality, it really was just a casual fight that most married couples have on a rare weekend but to Yoongi, it was explosive.

It was far more hurtful than he anticipated because in his eyes now, you don’t love him that much anymore.

“Okay. Go ahead,” you mumble for him to hear, putting away leftovers like any other night. You meticulously wrap the plates with cling wrap, your back turned to him when you mutter. “I hope the door hits your ass on the way out.”

“O-oh?” Yoongi backtracks when he hears your go-ahead, literally shell-shocked to see that you’re not stopping him. He wipes away his tears before you turn your neutral gaze back to him, swallowing the lump on his throat. “I’m going now. To get some air.”

“Okay, Yoongi.”

He’s done this before. There’s been fights where you tell him not to walk out on you and he complies. There’s also been fights where he walks out anyways, but you’d always tell him I love you and not to stay out too late.

He’s attempting the second option because clearly, you’re not pleading for him to talk this out and later on could the two of you get some air together.

“I’m really, really going now.”

He looks at you with shaky eyes, clearly pleading for you to indulge him by making him stay. 

You see right through him. You see right through your husband and in any other day would you just laugh this off, but tonight isn’t working for you. You were tired from work, Yoongi picked a fight with you for no reason, and you neither have the energy to tolerate nor chase him.

Every now and then, you should stop coddling Yoongi and give him exactly what he claims to want.

“Okay. Bye.”

You leave no room for any more replies, sauntering over the stairs without looking back.

Yoongi doesn’t want to look like a coward for not following through what he said so he audibly opens the door with the creak being heard all the way up the stairs. He’s not even a fourth out of the door but his bottom lip already blubbers, legs trembling from another type of chill that his pajamas can’t protect him from.

Shouldn’t this be the part where you tell him not to stay out too late?

( ♡ )

It’s 9:30 on a Saturday, Yoongi’s at a friend’s club wearing his sleeping pajamas on, drinking Pocari Sweat because crying on the way here really dehydrated him.

Yoongi is not doing well.

Jin’s originally here to survey his club at a peak night, but that plan went downhill as soon as Yoongi spotted him and immediately clung to his back asking for electrolyte water.

“Call Y/N using my phone.”

Yoongi mumbles when the two of them are settled at a secluded booth, all the noise being significantly decreased but not enough for it to be unrecognizable that he’s at a club through a phone call.

“And why exactly would I do that?” Jin snorts, already having an inkling to know where this is going from having a quick run-down from your husband himself.

He’s just about to lecture him with the words he’s always been wanting to say; something along the words that Yoongi’s bratty tendencies were eventually gonna bite him in the ass hard.

Seokjin doesn’t get to do that though because a phone is thrust to his face that it almost punches him, making him faux spit into nothing and wave off his bodyguards standing at a distance from him.

“Quick. She’s probably worried sick about me!” Yoongi convinces Jin, or atleast tries to because he’s the one that needs it. You’re probably wondering where he is, right? There may be no texts in his inbox, but who’s to say that you’re telepathically texting him to ask what time he’s coming home… right?

“No she’s not,” he sing-songs. He plans to annoy his friend for about 98% the time he’s going to be here (he’s gonna send him home to you anyway before 10:30) and the other 2% for semi-sincere consoling.

Then an idea pops into Jin’s head.

“What should I say?” he suddenly and eagerly takes up Yoongi on his request, not waiting for an answer before the perfect scenario pops in his head. “Ah wait, let me be in charge of that.”

Jin’s already pressing to call you much faster to Yoongi’s expectations because he really thought that it would take more amounts of convincing to do this. The phone’s put on speaker and as soon as it rings, Yoongi feels the urge to duck. He’s steadily about to snatch his phone back but you answer your phone even faster than he could do that.

“Hi Y/N!” Seokjin beams and it makes you smile from the other end, a clue already being filled in your head where exactly your husband went to. “Whatcha doing?” 

Jin makes conversation with you on Yoongi’s phone, sleazily smiling as he takes it off of speaker as soon as his friend hears your voice. Yoongi clearly takes an outrage with that but he contains it when Jin fully extends his arm out, holding him back by the face.

“Ugh, did you make popcorn? No way, not one burnt kernel? I knew it-!” Jin yelps when Yoongi bites his palm, quickly standing up from his seat in the booth so Yoongi couldn’t catch up with him. “I told you- I told you that brand’s way better!” 

“She’s not asking why you’re using my phone?” Yoongi whisper-yells as he circles around Seokjin, hands anxiously attempting to grab his phone back. “She’s not asking about me?”

Jin hears him loud and clear but he pretends not to, only sparing a glance. “Did you use the microwave preset? Personally I recommend only popping it in for two minutes and fifteen seconds because- motherfucker!”

Yoongi pinches him by the nape quite harshly like how you’d do with a kitten and it makes Jin freeze for a brief second, stealing his phone back with the call on-going.

“Y/N!” he almost yells to the phone, the momentary silence making it sink to him that he’s finally talking to you after so long. 

Read: it has only been forty minutes.

“What?” you groan into the phone, pushing your voice to be further disinterested. You’re no longer mad at him anymore — you’re just having some bit of fun at this point.

“I-I...” the words dissolve quickly on his tongue, the taste being bitter once again even when he was certain that the Pocari washed it out earlier. Yoongi says the next best thing he could that first pops up into his head, the random blurting of words being amusing even for Jin’s bodyguards.

“I uhm, I have a splinter.”

“Then take it out.”

“It hurts,” he whines at another attempt, screwing his eyes shut at the secondhand embarrassment because from the corner of his eye, one of the three bodyguards is actually clutching at his stomach from laughing. 

“Have Jin do it for you then.”

“Jin and I are in the club, by the way!” he reminds you, perking up slightly now that you indirectly acknowledged where he is and who he’s with.

“Mhmm.”

Just one last pathetic attempt of skirting around and if it doesn’t work, Yoongi will immediately come home to you.

“Is the popcorn good?” 

Read: it doesn’t work.

Jin steals his phone back before he could even hear your response to his dumb-witted question, getting a painful run-down from his friend instead. “You’re painful to watch, y’know that?”

He sighs disappointedly at Yoongi, rolling his eyes before pressing the phone to his ear. “So? What’s it taste like? It’s not really oily, I told you already. The cheese doesn’t smell obnoxious either. Because actually — exactly! It doesn’t stain your fingers!”

Yoongi… will lose it. But before he loses it completely, he gathers all his remaining sanity to continue your tradition while Jin keeps you preoccupied. He spots two things quickly and puts it into his arms with no semblance of shame, even if Jin’s bodyguards saw him technically shoplifting. Yoongi thinks it doesn’t count as such because Jin already knows about the tradition between the two of you, and as predicted, his friend just waves him off in acknowledgement.

It’s a tiny tradition.

Whenever one of you goes somewhere without the other, it’s a rule to bring back a souvenir. There’s no specifications to it, just whatever item you could bring back as proof that you thought about the other while you were out.

Some of the souvenirs you brought home to Yoongi: a pretty rock, a duvet cover, a liter of hand sanitizer, a designer card wallet, and a scrunchie with his name embroidered on it.

Some of the souvenirs Yoongi brought home to you: a fancy teaspoon, a hotel pillow, ten perfume testers at the same time, a remote holder, and a teddy bear with his voice as its squeezable heart.

Yoongi thinks that he doesn’t have shoplifting tendencies but in hindsight of some of the souvenirs he’s gotten you, there may be a pattern to it.

“You brought home... a shot glass.”

You look at the tiny glass, the remnants of electrolyte water still swishing around it.

“Wrong,” he sternly replies, bringing an item from behind his back that couldn’t be anymore obvious even if he tried. “I brought home a shot glass and a tiny potted plant.”

“Since when did bars have potted plants?” you mutter in disbelief, taking the miniature bonsai from him and looking at it in wonder.

“Since tonight! Jin’s, I don’t know, entrepreneurial like that. I wanted to show it to you so I brought it home.”

Your husband says it’s like the most obvious thing to do; his desire for you to know that he indeed thought about you while he was gone manifesting into bringing home one shot glass, and one tiny bonsai to prove it.

“You stole it, Yoongs.”

The amusement lilts in your voice and Yoongi catches on to it, but he just can’t seem to let it go, a little upset that you’re focused on him “stealing” it instead of the fact that he’d go through whatever lengths for you.

“Again, I brought it home because I wanted you to see it!”

“You could’ve just sent me a picture,” you giggle, setting down the pot on your side table. You peel back the covers you momentarily left, patting the spot beside you and Yoongi clearly could not have went to bed any more eager than this.

“How was I supposed to know?” he mumbles in defeat, a frown on his face. “You probably would’ve iced me out.”

“You didn’t even ask me what time I’d get home.” 

Yoongi sighs and even if the moment’s already been significantly lightened with the souvenirs, it brings you a greater relief now that your husband’s choosing to say what’s exactly bothering him instead of pissing you off.

“You didn’t even chase me through the door! I didn’t even want to go!” he’s almost one step into a tantrum and you have to hold him by the arm to not get too carried away by reminiscing, rolling your eyes when you hold him closer.

“You went out because you thought I’d chase you.”

“Exactly,” he affirms, albeit a little upset now that he’s confirmed you knew all along. “Can’t you just chase after me?” Yoongi asks innocently, soft eyes staring you down.

The moment’s too tender that it makes your shoulders hunch, hand automatically moving to the side of his face to guide him into nuzzling into the crook of your neck — a move he looks forward to especially after tonight.

“I’m not always gonna chase after you, Yoongi,” you confide, lips brushing on his temple. “You’re just so damn stubborn sometimes. Like, makes-my-jaw-clench type of stubborn.”

“I’m sorry,” Yoongi sincerely apologizes, his face still buried to your neck with his arms clinging around your middle. “I guess I’m just so used to you making amends with me that it makes me act out on purpose.”

Yoongi faults himself at the end of the night this time, without your prompting, and you can’t deny that it makes your heart full.

“I’m sorry, baby.”

He lifts his head up to look at you directly, lips puffed into a pout with his eyes in slow blinks. “Yoongi’s very sorry.”

Maybe you spoke too soon. Maybe Yoongi’s just always gonna be slightly annoying.

“Did you just talk about yourself in third-person?” you mumble, eyes suddenly snapping open when it sinks into you.

“Isn’t it cuter that way? Is it working?” your husband heartily laughs, stretching his arms out to put around you and invade your personal space even more. “Why, do you feel it working?”

“I don’t know what to feel about it, that’s for sure,” you chuckle, the atmosphere completely lightened at this point.

“I promise I’ll try not to be difficult anymore. Won’t piss you off either.”

“That doesn’t happen overnight, Yoonie.” 

Yoongi’s just… mischievous. His love language was to pull stuff with you and although it keeps you on your toes more often than necessary, you wouldn’t be tired of him.

“Tell you what, promise me this instead,” you turn right when Yoongi was about to do it himself so he could bury his face to the crook of your neck again, blinking owlishly to listen at what you have to say.

“Try to chase after me too. Let me be the difficult one sometimes.” 

Yoongi smiles, the switch being more than intriguing. “M’kay. That’s not as hard to promise doing.”

The concept of it makes him happy too much that it lingers there, reverting back to calling you his term of endearment for you and that’s when you know that there’s nothing left unresolved between the two of you now.

“I like that, bear. You should try picking fights with me too. It’s fun sometimes, trust me!”

“I can tell,” you hum, blindly reaching out your arm to turn off the nightlight at your side.

“Yoongi likes that.”

“Stop talking about yourself in third person.”

“I think it’s already growing on me,” Yoongi admits, tilting his head and knowing for a fact that it would take more than fifteen minutes to sleep tonight while in thought.

“Is it gonna stick?” 

The groan leaves you automatically and by the lack of response, you already know your answer.

“Bear,” you hum. “If you keep doing that, I’m gonna pick a fight with you tomorrow, alright?”

“M’kay! Remind me tomorrow what time you’re gonna start pissing me off, yeah?” he grins from ear to ear, not requiring a nightlight to see that your husband looks at you so fondly.

“Good night, baby,” Yoongi finally bids you, pressing a tender kiss right to your lips before tucking you with the comforter exactly how you liked it. “Loving you is my favorite part of the chase.”

min yoongi

smaus

shut up

two closed off people fall for each other, no one would of seen this coming

do it again @kimnjss | a s

months after deciding to end their three year long relationship, a sex tape hits the internet. fans go wild speculating that rap star, min yoongi and aspiring model, yn are the stars. old feelings arise as the couple try to figure out a way out of this.

thinking of you @smaubts | c

yoongi and y/n hate each other, at least that's what they tell everyone. when unexpected events occur they begin to realise that maybe the real cause for all the hate is because it's a way to hide the feelings they won't admit.

bluebird @firebettercallnct | a f c

trying to suppress your feelings for someone is hard but it's even harder when they're seemingly happy with someone else.

or in which he's a sunset and she's a bluebird.

good bad choices @bangtanloverboys | f

girls like you aren't normally seen with guys like him, but he's nothing like what you think

t.l.h.c. (the lonely hearts club) @cinnaminsvga | c f a

social media au where y/n and yoongi are mutuals but they're constantly at each other's throats for reasons unknown (aka emotional constipation)

the duff @sillyseoks | f

After years of pining after the shy boy, Jeon Jungkook, Min Yoongi takes pity upon y/n and with his dropping grades, he enlists her to help him raise them. In return, he’ll “deduff” her and get the younger boy to fall in love with her. But that was certainly easier said than done, especially with unrequited loves, crackhead groupchats, bff drama, and homework in the mix.

call me baby @smaubts

in which yoongi accidentally tells his ex he's dating y/n, his sworn enemy, which leads to him and his friends to create a plan envolving his sworn enemy y/n and fake dating her. a very platonic and fake relationship turns awkward when unexpected feelings arise.

daylight @maravillamin | a f

life gets a little more complicated when your son befriends a kid whose father seems to hate your guts

maybe this time @minbbyy

Stealing songs, and marketing them as your own is the worst thing you could do being in the music industry. You’re fake, lazy, unprofessional, a thief, and a liar. Being accused of something so serious, y/n didn't know what to do. Y/N thought she could rely on her best friends but they turned their backs on her. With no evidence in her favor, she ran. Now a year later, she’s ready to live the life that she lost and clear her name. Will she be able to handle facing those who betrayed her? Will she be able to trust them again after everything they did to her? Maybe this time, she’ll gain back the friendships and love that she lost. Maybe this time, she’ll find a new love to carry her through her hurt and pain.

now you see me @minsugapie | f a

You’re a content creator that is wanting to change up your brand a little bit.

Yoongi is a faceless musician. Well, he’s two people at once. He’s the faceless Agust D online and while performing, but he’s Min Yoongi in real life.

Who will he be to you?

epiphany @hxneysuga | f a

unlikely alliance @bts-celestials

yoongi helps you get the boy of your dreams and you help him get the girl of his dreams, it’s a win-win situation!

spoiled milk @adorajoon

an au in which you join an app that assigns you to groupchats randomly

fake love @cafevantae | a c

in which you go from single to ‘engaged’ overnight, all because you don’t want to show up to your ex-boyfriend’s wedding alone

second chance

After Yoongi got his heart broken by his first love ever, he decided to leave and live a little adventure.

broken hearts club @bbangpanmen | f a

“in those 13 years... where was i?”

best friends to lovers au except you’re not the best friend

also

what happens to the one who gets left behind?

loser baby @dejayoonw | f a c s

Schola Veneficas, a college for witches where everyone seems to know who you are which is weird considering you don’t really know much about your family history. When the cute fifth year takes pity on you it makes the unexpected hostility a little more bareable, at least for a little while.

more @dejayoonw | a f

recently divorced & looking for a new producer you’re inroduced to the seemingly stoic and hardworking min yoongi. at first it seems like he hates you but slowly he begins to warm up, showing you who he really is. how could you not fall for the caring, talented and amazingly devoted father?

your voice @burningupp

at night, yoongi tends to frequent cafés to get some work done. one night, he hears you sing, and his world is forever changed.

series

skin deep @aquaminwrites | a s

fluff

love grows where you go. @hueseok | 11.4k ; a f s

determined to make you and yoongi grow closer for your upcoming wedding in two weeks, your parents plan a trip for the both of you that lasts five days long. you know you should be ecstatic about it, considering your longtime crush on your fiancé, but by how you're positive that he secretly despises your whole being, you don't find this mini vacation with him something to look forward to. that is until things take an unexpected turn and suddenly, he makes it apparent he doesn’t hate you at all as you reckoned.

yoongi doesn't romance @jamaiskookie | 6.6k ; c f

yoongi isn't great at expressing feelings- especially with how nervous he gets around you. alternatively titled: yoongi sucks at romance

the way to your heart @joonary | 9k

when your office christmas party’s secret santa gives you absolutely no context on what kind of gift he wants, you have no choice but to get to know him better.

cream & suga @snackhobi | 14.8k ; f s

yoongi is your favourite regular. he’s patient, polite, and predictable, a-large-black-coffee-to-go-please, no cream, no sugar, thank you. rinse and repeat. the seasons might change, but yoongi’s order stays the same.

and then one fateful day in winter, yoongi asks about the weekly specials, orders a cup of christmas and sugary sweetness, and everything starts changing.

the third & sixth @jimlingss | 7.9k

One. Two. Three. Fantastic things come in threes, that includes you and your two best friends. But when they start dating each other, you quickly come to realize that you’ve become the infamous. third. wheel. Left out — invading their date — forced to watch them canoodle — an unnecessary extension to the group. It only worsens when you upgrade into the fifth wheel.....until a special sixth comes along.

wondering about holding min yoongi's hands @bangtanloverboys | 1.5k

you defintely don't have a hand kink but min yoongi's hands are something else

mixtape @jungblue | 15.6k ; s f

Two mystery students from your college run the podcast dubbed ‘mixtape.’ It’s become a sort of phenomenon around campus, listened to by almost everyone. In their most recent episode they discussed various study methods... One of them being oh so tempting.

yoongi as your bf @bangtansfavwriter

stuck with you @retrievablememories | 3.3k

“Can you do a idol!Min Yoongi of BTS request of his crush being best friends with Jimin and Taehyung and him and his crush consistently fluster the other but they never realize until one day he does and finally make as move despite everyone telling them for weeks that they like each other?”

[01:26 am] @wtf-yoongi

an out of bounds umbrella @bubmyg | 10.2k

you’re apologetic about almost blinding your university’s star point guard with the broken tip of your umbrella until you share a class with him and find out he’s a three star recruit but a four star dick or min yoongi doesn’t find your high school musical puns amusing.

yoongi as your boyfriend @xpeachesncream

a night in the studio @elliescrolls | 0.8k

nights in the studio are the best.

maybe i love you, maybe you love me @jinpanman | 2.9k

It’s something you’ve known since you were five and it’s only grown stronger as the decades passed.

tts drabble 7: the first "baby talk" @ubemango

smut

moonlight. @atdawnsuga | 3.6k

Your boyfriend drags you to a work event. Feeling bored and aroused by thoughts of him, you slip away and enjoy some privacy with him.

the devil in the details @foreignfingers | 6.5k

Your roommate is a disembodied voice, full of sarcasm and utter contempt for mankind. And when it comes to you? He might be willing to jump through a few hoops, or bodies, just to make you scream.

beg for it. @atdawnsuga | 3.9k

Yoongi fucks you up so you decide to shamelessly torture him.

rogue. @junghelioseok | 3.9k

a night out leads you to exactly where you want to be

strike a chord @snackhobi | 15.8k

your idea of a good night certainly doesn't involve being stood up by yet another blind date and finding yourself alone in a fancy bar; fortunately for you, there's an attractive man playing the piano to keep you busy, instead.

damn the charcuterie board. @bratkook

meteor @whatifyoulivelikethat

Ah, university. A time to get drunk, get laid, and get an education. Not so for Min Yoongi however (not even the education part, smh). He was dragged along to parties because of the insistence of his friends (despite having fun anyway, what a grump). Until a meteor crashes into his atmosphere, in the form of a picture he didn’t remember taking, and then Yoongi’s life becomes a whole lot more interesting.

muse @another-army-spot | 4k ; f s

When your boyfriend cancels on his own birthday dinner to finish work instead, you decide to pay him a visit to his studio so he won’t be so lonely.  There, you can at least make sure he’s taken care of properly.

sinning hands @moonlightchildz

want a taste? @suga-kookiemonster | 18.3k

pretzel pro. most skillful tongue in the food court world. allegedly. that’s what yoongi keeps telling you, anyway. of course, you’re reasonably skeptical of his claims—but if there’s one thing that motivates the notoriously-lethargic man, it’s proving skeptics wrong.

gym rat @mingoyeob-archive | 5k

you told everyone you were spending more time at the gym in an effort to turn your life around. in reality you were going just to sneak glimpses at one of the regulars who, for some reason, always looked like he hated being there. that didn’t seem to stop him from bending you over the bench in the gym locker room though. inspired by yoongi’s new gym bod that’s suits him a little too well.

uncharted territory @satnin-darling

It started off with two. And then, there was a possibility of three. You thought that Jungkook was only meant to be for one night only, mostly because Yoongi was parading his fiancé around and that irked you more than you cared to admit. Yet, Jungkook asserted himself more often, and you let him, not forgetting Yoongi of course. Turns out you had nothing to worry about since they are more than happy to accommodate.

the dark. @bratkook | 18k

your small town thrives on the occult, luring tourists in with endless themed festivities, but the only place you’re determined to see is the mysterious club that comes to life the week before Halloween. what makes The Dark so exclusive, and what secrets are they hiding behind closed doors?

trick or treat. @satnin-darling | 5.9k

The Joker, a Gray Pianist, and an Action-taker were supposed to walk into a bar on Halloween. Turns out they don't even make it past the front door because they were too busy fucking each other to partake in this year’s spooky season 🎃😜

rule of three @satnin-darling | 10.6k

In the parameters of writing, the “rule of three” is based on the principle that things that come in threes are inherently more satisfying or more effective than any other number. You and Yoongi can't help but notice Jungkook's persistent fascination, so why not indulge? Anyhow, there's nothing wrong with testing out a tried and true principle in the presence of an eager participant 😉

tesselation | 2.4k ; s f

Yoongi loves being your good boy

aftermath | 2k

after PTD LA D-1 , Jungkook comes back to you absolutely being wrecked by RM and Yoongi becuase he asked them to. Then he takes over.

monster for rent @yoonjinkooked | 20.6k ; s c

With your emotions riding high after a draining break-up, you can finally taste freedom after what felt like a prison you willingly signed up for. After a much needed night out with your friends, the word inhibition is erased out of your vocab. High on both adrenaline and liberation, you don’t even pause to think before you make your next move - and just for one night, you decide to go for a different kind of monster. 

masterlist. ( stuff i wrote for fun! )

go to | home / m. list / faq

Keep reading

summary: the enemies to lovers social media au where min yoongi refuses to date a cheerleader, but yoon haryun might be able to change that.

fandom: bangtan sonyeondan / bts

genre: college au universe! / enemies to lovers

ship(s): min yoongi x female!oc / jung hoseok x female!oc / kim seokjin x female!oc / more to come…

updates: every tuesday, thursday, and sunday

status: ongoing

before you read: this is the first book in the walking cliches series, the others will follow soon. the length is currently undetermined.

there will be an attempt at humor

angst is included

fluff too

read at your own risk

pleath enjoy!

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ accounts : female ( twitter / instagram )

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ accounts : male ( twitter / instagram )

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ additional accounts : snu

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 001 | the whole fucking store

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 002 | chef boyardee

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 003 | hand in marriage

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 004 | first day of classes

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 005 | jealous and lonely

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 006 | dance team vs cheer team

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 007 | namgguk birthday bash

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 008 | kim geummi (derogatory)

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 009 | jung hoseok [ written ]

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 010 | believe in the process

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 011 | broken table chronicles

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 012 | ikea is swedish

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 013 | party time

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 014 | the start of something terrible [ written ] ( part one / part two )

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 015 | min yoongi no more

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 016 | never see her again

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 017 | joonie’s birthday

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 018 | a nice challenge

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 019 | cheer practice [ written ]

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 020 | twitter is the new instagram

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 021 | quintuple shots of espresso [ written ]

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 022 | to the library

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 023 | battle of the textbook [ written ]

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 024 | who is haryun?

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 025 | hickey on his face

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 026 | blocked, unblocked

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 027 | min yoongi = whipped

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 028 | luda’s shit list

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 029 | yoongi’s :] smile

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 030 | day one [ written ]

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 031 | about soyeon (day two)

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 032 | day three [ texts / written ]

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 033 | haryun the unaliver

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 034 | day five

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 035 | we stay hungry, we devour

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 036 | day six / basketball practice [ written / texts ]

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 037 | day 8 [ texts / written ]

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 038 | day 9

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 039 | the after math ( part one / part two )

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 040 | day 11 [ written ]

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 041 | game day ( part one / part two )

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 042 | seokyun + 3 randos

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 043 | day 12 [ texts / written ]

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 044 | day 13 [ written ]

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 045 | day 14 [ written ]

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 046 | moonhee’s an empath

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 047 | kim seokjin the boat captain

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 048 | yoongi’s pov

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 049 | no deadlines

☆ ⁄⁄ ★ 050 | jimins party

(m. list) kiss it better | myg

🠒 summary: you're one of the lucky ones, everyone else tells you. finding your soulmate the day you turn 18 isn't something that happens to a lot of people... but you and your other half are going to have to make a lot of progress to be able to tolerate each other.

or, you and yoongi can feel everything the other feels, and you're hell bent on causing each other pain.

🠒 pairing: yoongi x reader

🠒 genre: angst, fluff, e2l!au, soulmates!au, college au, crack?

🠒 warnings: profanity, implied smut

🠒 notes: i own up to being a soulmates!au hoe... and here is the attestation for it. i hope you enjoy reading this!!!

PARTS

🠒 01 | one gaze

🠒 02 | two band-aids

🠒 03 | three roses

🠒 04 | the four of us

🠒 05 | five dates

🠒 06 | six idiots (plus yoongi)

🠒 07 | seven o'clock

🠒 epilogue | lifetime with you

taglist: open, just send an ask!

title: erode all my edges author: smashthatlikebutton rating: teen wordcount: 12900 pairing: kim namjoon/min yoongi summary:

“Thanks,” Yoongi murmurs, setting his bag down next to his chair and just staring at the steaming cup for a few more moments. “That’s- thank you.”

Dimples pulls a face, ducking back into his book. “It wasn’t a bother,” he mumbles.

“It’s coffee,” Yoongi responds, distantly realising that this is their longest conversation yet. “I’m always grateful for coffee. I owe you my life, now, just so you know.”

[Yoongi shares a corner of a library with a dimpled boy. They fall in love through terrible coffee, napping in tandem, and discovering each other’s silences.]

link