Latest Posts by itsrorotime - Page 3
I took a test online once
To see if I was the Soldier
The Poet
Or the King
It told me I was the King
I always thought I’d be the poet
I think all kings long to be poets
In the same way that all eldest daughters long to just be children
Why bury your pain for the sake of others when you can turn it into art
Why raise children you didn’t make
But just like the test said
“The sword is at your side”
“It bore your name long before you did”
I never asked it to bear my name
I want to be free of it
But we all want what we are not meant to be
“You are tired of being steady. You dream of feeling alive. Not that you aren't, but, sometimes, it's hard to remember that there is a heart between your ribs.” -@atlanticsea
Skincare tips: Retinol
If unsure, start with the most gentle sort of retinol (retinol esther, or the 2nd most gentle, pure retinol - read how it works here).
Consistency over intensity. It's better to use a gentle product consistently over weeks, months, years, than it is to use an aggressive/strong product over a brief period.
Less is more.
You can use retinol regardless of your skin color, just start slow and on the low, gentle end of retinols.
What it does: thickens the skin, encourages cell turnover / skin regeneration. Smooths wrinkles and fine lines over long-term consistent use.
How much to apply: a pea-size amount is sufficient for the entire face.
When to apply: in the evening, after doing your skincare routine, on a clean & dry face. Avoid applying in the morning, as retinol makes your skin sensitive to sun damage, and retinol itself also breaks down under the sun, making it less efficient in the mornings.
How often: 2-3 times a week (ie. Monday - Wednesday - Saturday). Keep up this routine to see if your skin tolerates it well, if it does (and this may take even a year to adjust) you can increase the frequency to every night.
What season to use: you can use retinol all-year round, just make sure you are protecting your skin with sunscreen, as it makes your skin photo sensitive.
When using retinol, be careful with these areas (as in the skin there is more sensitive, so apply less product + more gentle retinol): around the mouth, neck, chest.
The only time you need to use retinols specially made for the eye area, is if you have very sensitive skin and standard retinols irritate the delicate skin around your eyes.
Be careful with using any acids* in your routine. Do not use them at the same time (ie. same evening). Alternate the days for each: if you apply retinol one evening, use acids the next evening only.
If you have underlying skin conditions (eczema, rosacea, etc), check with your dermatologist first before testing out retinol.
Retinol is not recommended to be used during pregnancy.
Don't exfoliate on the same nights you use retinol (ie. salicylic acid or other acids*), as it's too aggressive on the skin.
For most retinol products, it is best to apply moisturizer before, to use as a buffer, and then apply the retinol. This includes the chest & neck areas.
(Source: dermatologist S. Idriss)
hi i was wondering if you had any skincare product reccomendations, i've never done skincare before and i don't really know where to start. i know i have sensitive and relatively dry skin.
i have a suncream that has spf 50+ which i think is good but do i need a specific one for my face? i apologise for all the questions but any advice would be amazing!
thank you!
💛
Hi darling!
Skincare is a tricky thing, because everybody's skin is different and as such has different needs. What works for one person may not work for another.
Firstly, you should start with my top skincare tips post so you understand the basics, function of ingredients, and which products are essential or not. You can also check out my skincare tag if you're interested in additional reading.
That being said, here are the basics from my routine and what currently works for me:
Morning routine:
Vitamin C serum: La Roche Posay - Vit C10 This helps brighten complexion, softens skin and helps to fade any blemishes, scars, etc. Pro tip: keep your Vit C serum in the fridge, Vit C tends to oxidize and turn orange with time, even if i doesn't affect its efficiency.
Sunscreen: La Roche Posay - Anthelios for Face SPF50 This is what I've been using for 2 years now, it's popular for good reason. Although I will say they recently changed the formula from completely dry to a little oily, and I prefer the former.
Night routine:
Cleanser: CeraVe - SA Smoothing Cleanser This is a chemical exfoliant (with Salicylic Acid) which is great for acne or break-out prone skin, to be used 2-3 times a week. For daily use I recommend CeraVe's classic cleanser, the Hydrating Cleanser.
Moisturizer: Bioderma - Hydrabio Riche Gentle, moisturizing, rich but not greasy. I always go back to this. (It's for dry skin, but if other readers have oily skin, try the Hydrabio Legere version instead.)
Skin-barrier repair (optional): La Roche Posay - Cicaplast Baume B5 This is a holy grail if you have damaged skin from using too many products, exfoliants, sunburn, etc. It's very gentle and soothing, and really does improve skin overnight. You can use it for face, body, even lips, but for that I prefer the product below.
Skin-barrier repair for lips (optional): La Roche Posay - Cicaplast Baume for Lips This is my go-to for intense hydration and repair (ie. chapped lips, wore drying lipstick all day, etc). Leave it on overnight and you'll wake up with smooth, plush lips ready for the day.
Retinol: The Ordinary - Retinol 0.2% in Squalane, CeraVe - Resurfacing Retinol Serum, La Roche Posay - Effaclar Adapalene 0.1% Topical Retinoid Retinol essentially regenerates your skin, helps with fine lines, wrinkles, scarring, etc. I'm still looking for the best retinol product, but I would recommend either of the above, all of which are direct recommendations I've found by dermatologists via Youtube or IG.
Conclusions
The only essentials you need are: cleanser, sunscreen, moisturizer. Everything else helps, but isn't necessary.
If you choose to add new products to your skincare routine, always add 1 at a time. That way you'll know which one is or isn't working for you.
Create the skincare routine that works for you. Don't go running after trends and trying out a hundred different things. Only test 1 product at a time, and when something works for you, keep it in your routine.
If you can afford it, reach out to a dermatologist to recommend products that are tailored to your needs. Most of the products listed were recommended by my dermatologist for mine.
If that's not an option currently, start following board-certified dermatologists on social media instead of taking advice from random people online as fact. You'll learn so much from their tips, plus it's free! I like watching Dr. Dre and Shereene Idriss, they are both entertaining and educational.
Hope this proves helpful, and let me know how your routine comes together. 💜
-Lumen
A Former Funky Bitch Guide for Remaining Fresh
As I do my scrolling, I have seen (and liked) many posts that go in depth about a hygiene routine however they’re all very…minimal. Unrealistic for most, dare I say. I only say that because though they may be useful for the ideal woman, a large percentage of women are beyond a standard hygiene routine and need something a bit more thorough. Myself being one of them.
Many women sweat fast which produce body odor rapidly. As our menstrual cycle approaches, body odor may become more pungent. Pregnancy may also produce pungent body odor temporarily and sometimes permanently. Remember, many women are still dependents (minors or college students) who are unable to change their diet yet your diet is an important factor towards production of your body odor.
This post is for my young ladies who may lack the privilege of having (parental) guidance for hygiene. Many of us like to downplay it as common sense, however I’ve personally experienced, witnessed with friends and worked with teens in poverty ridden neighborhoods who lack the knowledge of what many consider the basics of hygiene. In fact, many mothers are so envious of their daughters they sabotage them in that matter. This is real life.
This post also heals my inner teen because I was that teenager. Depression played a part. Parental negligence played a part. Lack of authority played a part.
Enough chit chat, here’s bullet points that you can screenshot and save for quick access in order to improve your hygiene to feel and smell as feminine as you are. This is a safe space:
African black soap has played a crucial part in stripping all of my body buildup unlike many body wash/bars of soap. It can irritate you, so I suggest purchasing diluted versions if you know you have sensitive skin. Otherwise, many beauty supply stores or African salon/shops sell African Black Soap.
Detoxing my underarms weekly with Aztec Clay, along with the t-zone (nose and center of forehead) of my face to minimize oil production on my face.
Cornstarch as a base before spraying deodorant to slow down the sweat. I use two drops of almond oil and lather my underarms up, apply the cornstarch (with a makeup puff? I forgot what they’re called lol yikes but wedge sponges work too) and seal it with my deodorant. You may want to put your shirt on first. This technique is similar to placing setting powder after your primer to keep your makeup from becoming dewy.
Wash bra and panties in the shower with me at night and when the AM hits I place them in the laundry. Sometimes the shirt I’ve worn if I need to.
Spray perfume on the arms of your shirt (CAUTION: If you have skin easily irritated, you may not find this tip useful.) Do not spray directly onto skin and instead spray within the underarms area of your shirt. Useful if you lift your arms often and are insecure about blowing a whiff regardless of if you have sufficient hygiene or not.
Keep wipes and dog poop bags in your purse: ladies let’s leave behind using solely tissue to freshen up after going to the bathroom. I’ve learned that many bathrooms don’t have garbage bins within the stalls or they’re only attached to the paper towel dispenser, so having dog poop bags that I can place my used wipes in has came in clutch.
Perfume/ Essential oil on dryer sheets in dresser or closet (CAUTION: FIRE HAZARD do NOT place dryer sheet with perfume or essential oils in the dryer. Can cause a fire especially with the old ass dryers y’all got). Also try this same trick if you bring a change of clothes to work/school to enhance the freshness.
A ziplock bag with a rag: If you work at a job that keeps you active and you cannot control your body’s reaction or you simply want to freshen up on your half hour break, this is a quick way to wipe away the sweat + natural buildup and remain smelling fresh. I’ve personally done this; it’s similar to a hoe bath.
You go to the bathroom, get you some hot water, you’ve already put African Black soap on your rag so it lathers up on contact, wash your arms/under boobs/intimate areas if you’re freshen up during your period (don’t use soap let alone the African one! You’re going to be burning jalapeño spicy), pat your clean area dry with a towel and proceed with your routine that may include cornstarch, deodorant and spraying body mist across your body. Ready to roll?
If your quick to sweat from your forehead, keep a scarf that you can use as a bandana/headband. I highly suggest these specific types below because you can easily manipulate it based on your outfit at the moment in need. I’ve worked at fast food, I’ve had to carry groceries, I’ve had to fight and sometimes the LAST thing you need is sweat getting in your eye (especially if you’re a fellow black girl. An edge control and sweat combo in the eye is not fun)
Activated charcoal in two ways: as an absorbant pad that can be placed as a sticker inside your clothing to avoid sweat stains or as a bath soak since charcoal contributes to expelling unwanted bacteria from your body which can be a factor behind your body odor.
I use these tips for my advantage and convenience. When I am going to an event that I know I will be photographed, I make sure I keep those underarm pads on me literally. I change my clothes at the gym often so I place perfumed dryer sheets inside a ziplock bag with my clothes so my perfume is not overwhelming but enhanced. My anxiety I’m not a fan on period cups when I’m out and about and cannot afford an accident, so I absolutely keep baby wipes and poop bags in my purse to dispose of my waste quickly and freshen up as I need to. It set me back $4 at Family Dollar…
Anyone and everyone should try these to make their lives easier. I hope this post was able to come across someone who needed this guidance because Lord knows I did at some point. Cheers to growth! 🕯🧿
My nemesis: sweaty armpit stains on shirts 😤
advice from doctors for EDS: avoid exercise!
advice from doctors for POTS: exercise!!
What is dysautonomia
Definition:
Dysautonomia refers to a disorder of autonomic nervous system (ANS) function that generally involves failure of the sympathetic or parasympathetic components of the ANS, but dysautonomia involving excessive or overactive ANS actions also can occur.
Some symptoms include:
Abnormally fast or slow heart rate
Anxiety
Excessive sweating or not being able to sweat
Fatigue
Feeling short of breath (especially when you exercise)
Feeling thirsty all the time
Having trouble swallowing
Headaches
Insomnia
Nausea and diarrhea
Vision problems (blurred vision, vision loss, tunnel vision)
AND A LOT MORE
Dysautonomia affects:
Blood pressure.
Breathing.
Digestion.
Heart rate.
Kidney function.
Pupil dilation and constriction in the eyes.
Sexual function.
Body and skin temperature control
Examples of diseases in which secondary dysautonomia can occur include:
Diabetes.
Parkinson’s disease.
Muscular sclerosis.
Rheumatoid arthritis.
Lupus.
Sjogren's syndrome.
Sarcoidosis.
Crohn’s disease, ulcerative colitis.
Celiac disease.
Charcot-Marie-Tooth disease.
Chiari malformation.
Amyloidosis.
Guillain-Barre syndrome.
Ehlers-Danlos syndrome.
Lambert-Eaton syndrome.
Vitamin B and E deficiencies
Human immunodeficiency virus (HIV).
Lyme disease.
Different types:
Neurocardiogenic syncope (NCS): NCS is the most common form of dysautonomia. It can cause fainting spells that happen once or twice in your lifetime or multiple times every day. NCS is also called situational syncope or vasovagal syncope.
Postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome (POTS): A disorder that causes problems with circulation (blood flow), POTS can cause your heart to beat too fast when you stand up. It can lead to fainting, chest pain and shortness of breath.
Familial dysautonomia (FD): People inherit this type of dysautonomia from their genetic relatives. It can cause decreased pain sensitivity, lack of eye tears and trouble regulating body temperature. FD is more likely to affect Jewish people (Ashkenazi Jewish heritage) of Eastern European heritage.
Multiple system atrophy (MSA): A life-threatening form of dysautonomia, multiple system atrophy develops in people over 40 years old. It can lead to heart rate issues, low blood pressure, erectile dysfunction and loss of bladder control.
Pure autonomic failure: People with this form of dysautonomia experience a fall in blood pressure upon standing and have symptoms including dizziness, fainting, visual problems, chest pain and tiredness. Symptoms are sometimes relieved by lying down or sitting.
Ok so I've found a way to describe what Neurodivergent Can't Do Task Mode™ feels like to neurotypicals
So you know how you can't make yourself put your hand down on a hot stovetop? There's a part of your brain that stops you from doing that? That's what Neurodivergent Can't Do Task Mode™ feels like
Even if we want to do it, there's a barrier stopping us from doing it, and it's really hard to override
And why does our brain see the task as a hot stovetop? Because when neurotypicals finish a task, they get serotonin, but we don't get that satisfaction after completing a task. A neurotypical wouldn't get serotonin from putting their hand on a hot stovetop, it would just hurt. When we can't do a task, it's because our brain knows that the task will hurt (metaphorically) and wants to avoid that.
It's not that we're choosing not to do the task, it's that our brain is physically preventing us from doing it.
Neurotypicals can and should reblog but please don't add anything
(Sorry/not sorry about the random bolding, it makes it easier for us to read)
getting overwhelmed by children makes me feel like such a bad person but honestly I cannot handle this.
there is a reason I will never have children of my own. they are loud and messy and not my thing and I am trying my best, but lord I am struggling. the only thing keeping me going is the fact that I cannot have a meltdown in front of these kids
The End of the world as we know it- Armin Arlert
Armin watches as a bloodbath of horror unfolds in front of him, the sounds of cries echoing the infinity of deaths that occur in less than an instant. Armin's chest swells with fear as his comrade's blood splatters like paint on a disgusting canvas of death. With Armin standing on the city's rooftops, he could see that this could be the last time he ever felt the air fill his lungs, the last time he could grasp the feeling of life before it was ripped away by the jaws of death.
Armin finally looks at the girl beside him as the steam gusts toss his hair around in the daylight. He noticed how her arms were lifeless at her side, her swords numbly clasped in her hands, long forgotten. He knew she was thinking the same thing he was;
“How are we going to get out of here alive?"
The thought causes Y/n’s hands to tremble. She couldn't imagine this being her final moment; her mind wouldn't let her. All she knew was that she was terrified and that she was paralyzed. She takes a hesitant breath.
“Y/n?”
As he glances up into her eyes, Armin's calm voice rises, a little sob escaping from the back of his throat. She cocks her head slightly, her gaze locked with Armin's cold blue ones, focusing on his words.
"I have something to say to you. I've never had the the words, or even the confidence, to say this to you before."
Armin takes a tentative step forward and reaches out to take herhand. He immediately observed a difference in the experience surrounding them when he joined their fingers together. The horrors he felt inside were contrasted by her warm, reassuring touch.
“So I'm just going to say it. I adore you. I've always admired you. Everything about you is unique. The way your eyes smile before your lips do, how you laugh at every stupid joke anyone tells you even if it's not funny, and, most importantly, how you have always comforted others even when you are in pain.”
Her vision became blurry as tears streamed down her cheeks after hearing Armin's confession.
"You're lovely, beautiful, and sweet. I don't know what life would be like without you, and I never want to find out. Y/n, I, I..."
Before Armin could finish his sentence, he felt Y/n’s lips brush against his. That kiss was the sweetness of passion, a million loving thoughts condensed into a single moment.
*********************
Hey! The writer here. This is my first official Armin one piece! I love this man sm omg.
Why is your personality type dangerous? ⚠️ Join @sosyncd today to meet your perfect personality match 💚
Ouch
INTP: I put the moron in oxymoron INFP: I put the pain in paintings ISTP: I put the angst in gangster ISFP: I put the rave in graveyard INFJ: I put the sun in misunderstood INTJ: I put the bias in phobias ISTJ: I put the law in flaw ISFJ: I put the harm in harmony ENTP: I put the troll in controller ENFP: I put the fun in dysfunctional ENTJ: I put the sass in assassin ENFJ: I put the fun in fundamental ESTP: I put the ass in classic ESFP: I put the disco in discord ESTJ: I put the hate in whatever ESFJ: I put the table in respectable
ENFP problems
- people not realizing that you want to be alone, but don’t know how to say it in a nice way.
- always ending up in the middle of arguments because you see both sides, causing your friends to get angry at you for not choosing theirs.
- not being able to stick to one thing because you’ll forget about it later.
- feeling like a “therapist” to people because they always vent to you and ask for your advice.
- wanting to be a leader, but dealing with conflict with your friends stresses you out. So you can’t give constructive criticism.
- your energy comes from people, but too much will overwhelm you. Always being in a cycle of surrounding yourself to isolating yourself.
- wanting to help people, but not knowing how.
- worried that you’re being manipulative all the time.
- not being able to let people go, leading into destructive relationships because you think about how they used to be, and they can be like that again.
- when your social energy is at 0% and you need time alone but you can’t get it.
- when your social energy is recharged and you feel horrible for pushing your friends away.
- getting ideas all the time for random projects, but never going through with it. Leaving a ton of papers all over your desk that you don’t want to get rid of.
- worried you’re not yourself. That you’re just someone that changes around every personality to fit their aura.
(These are just some of my experiences)
“if you take medication for that, you’ll be taking medication all your life!!” yeah, and?? bud, i already put on my glasses every morning. it’s like. a condition of mine, not a side hobby i’m pursuing irresponsibly.
ADHD Ask!
1.When were you diagnosed?
2.What type do you have? (Hyperactive, Inattentive, Combination)
3.Do you stim?
4.What is your favorite stim toy?
5.Looking back what behaviors did you do that you now realize are ADHD related that no one noticed?
6.Did you ever receive special education services because of your ADHD?
7.What are the positive qualities you have associated with ADHD?
8.What techniques help you cope with your ADHD?
9.Do you have any comorbid diagnoses?
10.What sensory things do you love?
11.What sensory things do you hate?
12.What is your experience with RSD (Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria)?
13.What part of ADHD do you struggle with most?
14.What part of ADHD have you learned to love?
Light In The Darkness by Chloe Amy Avery by mtlgrems
INFP culture is having a breakdown and giving yourself a peace sign in the mirror afterwards
INFP: Today I parked my car on a street.
INFP: And I didn't pay for the parking.
INTP: Wow, I tremble with fear. INFP, you've become a criminal.
INFP: *horrified but secretly proud*
musical lyrics as truths the types need to hear
ESTJ: “Life is never what you planned. Life is moments you can’t understand. And that is life” (Falsettos)
INFP: “You pretend to create and observe when you really detach from feeling alive” (Rent)
ISFP: “Make just a ripple. Come on, be brave. This time a ripple, next time a wave” (Anyone Can Whistle)
ESTP: "You may know what you need, but to get what you want, better see that you keep what you have” (Into the Woods)
ISTP: “Prefix ‘ordinary’ with ‘extra’” (Finding Neverland)
ENFP: “Don’t fall apart at the seams. It’s called letting go your illusions, and don’t confuse them with dreams” (Merrily We Roll Along)
ISTJ: “You can like the life you’re living. You can live the life you like” (Chicago)
ENTJ: “So scared of what your enemies will do to you—you’re the only enemy you ever seem to lose to” (Hamilton)
ESFP: “Nice is different than good” (Into the Woods)
ENTP: “Well, I’ll sing you the story of a sorrowful lad. He had everything he wanted, didn’t want what he had” (Pippin)
ESFJ: “Nobody but me is going to change my story” (Matilda)
ISFJ: “Stop worrying where you’re going. Move on. If you can know where you’re going, you’ve gone” (Sunday in the Park with George)
INTJ: “You’ve got so many reasons for not being with someone, but…you haven’t got one good reason for being alone” (Company)
INFJ: “The choice may have been mistaken. The choosing was not. You have to move on” (Sunday in the Park with George)
ENFJ: “Hey, buddy, don’t be afraid it won’t be perfect. The only thing to be afraid of, really, is that it won’t be” (Company)
INTP: “Give me pain, if that’s what’s real. It’s the price we pay to feel” (Next to Normal)
infp: When cats sleep all day they’re cute
infp: But when I do it I’m ‘clinically depressed’ and 'need to get help’
If The Types Came with an Instruction Manual: INFP Edition
Congratulations! You are now the proud owner/friend of an INFP! Here are a few things to take note of with your new best friend! Oh, you didn’t know INFP was now your best friend? Well now you do, because if you have one, it’s going to stay by your side for pretty much ever.
1. Your INFP comes with the innate ability to scope out good and bad! This particular model is very good at determining whether or not a person is being truthful and genuine or totally fake! You just acquired a lie detector as well. Your INFP will be able to break a person down in about 5 minutes flat !On top of that, they will warn you as well like the little Golden retrievers they are! 2. Your INFP is an INTROVERT! This means that more often than not, your INFP is going to be just as happy staying in and watching a movie by his or her self, than going out. So remember to keep the super social things down to a small amount or this will drain your INFPs battery.* They tend to like one on one things or a small group often a maximum of 3-5. Be sure to ask INFP how they feel. Be prepared for a 30 minute conversation.
*CAUTION: If INFP loves you, INFP will try to force itself to go to gatherings so as to make you happy. Then you will not see INFP for a week or more. Be careful with INFPs willingness to participate as likely they do it for you.
3. INFP cares Deeply!! Your INFP comes standard with the ability of caring too much and too deeply. Usually this trait makes them resent themselves more than anything, but when they find that person who appreciates them for it, they become very happy and stick to you like glue. Please be sure to listen to INFP when they speak and try your best to understand them, because 99.9999% guaranteed, your INFP listens to you and remembers most everything you like and dislike. 4. Your INFP usually likes one of the following: Writing, drawing, music, etc. This is a way your INFP expresses themselves, and is a very important thing to them. There is a 40% chance that INFP will show you there art/writing/music choices one day. When/If they do, know that INFP finds you very special, as this is very uncommon and you have become the chosen one.
5. Your INFP is obsessed with something. No really, your INFP has something that it loves and expresses said love for it. Whether it is something as small as a fascination with rocks to a unhealthy love of rainbows. Please indulge this. INFP will show this feature the more you spend time with them. Pro Tip: If you get a gift for INFP that involves said obsession, you will become their favorite person ever and will likely keep with gift in a place and remember you every time they look at it. Plus they will likely never expect you to do this for them.
6. Your INFP is not good at confrontation. Your INFP DOES NOT like confrontation and will do anything to avoid it. They are diplomats and they keep true to the title. They try to make peace in bad situations and can often stop fights by being the nuetral go between. They are able to see both sides of the coin and will try their best to make everyone happy. Please avoid confrontation to spare INFPs becoming mentally exhausted/Upset/using every emotion they have and know of…
7. INFPs are VERY GOOD AT CONFRONTATION. (Yes we are aware of what was stated above in 6) While INFP does not like confrontation, when a friend of INFP has been wronged, it is as if something snapped in INFP and suddenly INFP will become bullet proof and will destroy its target. In plain terms, your Golden Retriever has now switched to full on Rottweiler guard dog mode. If you want this action not to be completed on your behalf, you must tell INFP before it annihilates the person that has wronged you. They have a very hurtful almost eerie way of completing this action and It is not pretty. Distract INFP with something shiny or its favorite thing to spare the person.
8. Your INFP in the embodiment of the word contradiction. (See 6 &7) Your INFP can be decisive and indecisive on the same day at basically the same time. One moment your INFP will be meek and mild like a lamb about one thing, and as vicious as a bear protecting it’s young about another. This is normal and in time will become less and less surprising.
Pro Tip: Don’t try to change this quality. It actually adds to INFPs quirkiness and overall personality. Plus their feelings WILL get hurt
9. Your INFP is very strong and can be very stubborn, but will cave if they love a person. Treat your INFP with care as their love for you will make them give in to doing most of what you want to make you happy. Consult with your INFP to be sure what you re doing/planning makes them happy too. More often than not it will, but they will appreciate the consideration and only love you more. (Be prepared for a 15-30 minutes conversation and possible tangents)
10. Your INFP needs to talk to you! Your INFP has a habit of keeping everything in. In their mind, the less they trouble you with their problems, somehow to them makes it better for everyone else. If left unchecked, INFP will slowly erode and self destruct and feel unlved and misunderstood. You must ask them how they are doing and spend one on one time with them often. It would be simple if asking how your INFP was was a simple as asking “how are you?” But it is NOT. You must sometimes be a little forceful. Show that you care.
Pro Tip: Invite INFP over for bonding time. Give them a warm cup of coffee/tea and a cozy place to sit. Be ready to listen. CAUTION! This will likely take from 2-8+ hours. Make a day for it!
These are the top 10 instructions for your new INFP friend! We would post more, but sadly the model INFP comes with 75 additional volumes each with 700+ pages per volume! But this is a good way to get started and get to knowing your new INFP!
Have fun with your new friend and Congratulations!
Enneagram 9 who fears being a burden so much that they’re running across the pedestrian crossing not to bother the drivers
Six: You’re always so calm, no matter what happens. How do you do it?
Nine: It’s easy. You just got to make yourself dead inside. Then it doesn’t matter what happens… good… bad… nothing gets through, so nothing bothers you. Easy.
What do you mean “like a head type”? Is there some tell tale signs that someone is heart/head/gut type in general? And by that i don’t mean the whole what is more important to you, anger shame anxiety thing
Guts are action oriented. They react immediately and viscerally (even 9s, who know immediately to withdraw. They have their tactics to get away and they use them as immediately as 8s or 1s) Guts are decisive in the moment.
Guts have had a certain peace and serenity ripped from them as children, which is why they act this way
Hearts are identity oriented. They reflect and then act according to their personal identity (even 3s, similar to 9s)
Hearts have a certainty in who they are ripped from them as children (by criticism or praise), which is why they want to act according to the identity.
Heads take longer to react. They think through what is happening and react in a “logical” (can be genuinely logical or illogical) way that will keep them safe in the future. Even 7s do this by running from the issue
Heads have inner guidance that has been taken away from them. They don’t know what the right course of action is as well as other types, which is why they act this way
The Types as Meme Man Memes: Enneatypes
Type 1 -
Type 2 -
Type 3 -
Type 4 -
Type 5 -
Type 6 -
Type 7 -
Type 8 -
Type 9 -
enneagram aesthetics
type one: freshly pressed linens, the sound of high heels on a marble floor, sunny days, a new lemon candle, writing letters to congress
type two: family photos, your best friend’s laugh, flower gardens, apple pie cooling in the window, picnics in the park
type three: first place ribbons, sunrise yoga, learning a new skill, iced coffee, giving advice to your best friend
type four: paint splattered overalls, the crackle of old vinyl records, flea markets, a cinnamon latte, watching the rain fall with a cup of tea
type five: soft flannel shirts, the gentle hum of a fan, museums, the pages of an old book, reading the sunday paper in bed
type six: paperback mystery novels, a kitten purring, the worn-out couch in your best friend’s house, a favorite perfume, calling an old friend
type seven: ticket stubs, songs that remind you of your childhood, bustling city streets, polaroids taped to the wall, roadtrips in the fall
type eight: black coffee, the steady tick of a grandfather clock, hiking in the mountains, a cabin in the woods after the first snow, a vase of sunflowers
type nine: peonies, chocolate chip cookies fresh from the oven, soft sweaters, a cozy night in, watercolor paintings hung on the wall
Enneagram type aesthetics (healthy)
Enneagram type aesthetics (healthy)
Enneagram 1: Crisp white sheets, freshly laundered and neatly laid on the bed. A handwritten letter folded into equal thirds and slipped into a fresh envelope. Handing in a final paper exactly on time, but finishing it the week before. A firm, friendly handshake between people who just met for the first time. A sigh of relief. Nailing a Pinterest recipe on the first try. Gardenias in the spring time. Small lace trim on a sensible dress. A well-aged leather briefcase passed down through generations.
Enneagram 2: The smell of cinnamon buns on a fall morning. Grandmother’s hugs. Grandpa showing you how to fix your bike. Volunteering for charities at Christmas time. Getting a handmade card in the mail. Surprise texts that let you know a friend was thinking about you. Cashmere. Tinkling laughter at a cocktail party. Knowing you’re safe. Arriving to the coffee shop and your friend grabbed your favourite spot and saved it for you. Your first kiss.
Enneagram 3: The feeling right before the gun goes off at the start of the race. A victory lap. A black jacket that goes with everything and looks incredible. A fresh hair cut. Checking the last thing off your to-do list. The heat of stage lights. Games night with old friends. Introducing new friends to one another and everyone hitting it off. Friends who know each other so well they can sit in silence in the same room and consider it a day well spent.
Enneagram 4: Digging through old trunks in the attic. Trying a new drink at the bar because it sounds dramatic. Holding a friend’s hand while they cry. The joy of discovering a picturesque alleyway. Letting your mind wander for hours. Road trips with the perfect playlist for every landscape. Deep understanding. Finding an old, beat up copy of your favourite book and treasuring the life it’s lead. Dried flowers in a vintage vase.
Enneagram 5: The smell of an old bookstore. Getting lost on thought trails for hours. A favourite t-shirt that’s worn in all the right places. A monocle passed down through generations. The joy of alone time. Dust drifting lazily through the evening window light. The joy of finally understanding something. Solo hikes in the mountains. A year-long adventure in a foreign country, immersing yourself in the culture. Telling the story for generations.
Enneagram 6: The feeling of sharing your story with a new friend and having them totally understand. Reunion trips in Hawaii. Gathering for orange slices after the soccer game when you’re a kid, and gathering for game night when you all grow up. Quiet nostalgia. A box of embarrassing but endearing photos and treasures from college. The feeling that everything is taken care of. A hug between old friends. Worn in boots that are stylish and functional and fit perfectly. Inside jokes you keep for years.
Enneagram 7: Fireworks in the summer. Working three jobs to save up for a backpacking trip. Drunken karaoke that’s very off key, but everyone sings along and cheers at the end. A mischievous wink. Bragging about knee scrapes after falling off a skateboard while going way too fast. Wearing plaid and polka dots at the same time, because someone said it shouldn’t be done. Ordering menu items that seem terrible, just to try them out. A prank competition between friends.
Enneagram 8: Loud, joyful laughter between friends at a coffee shop. Reading an entire book series in one weekend, wishing you were living the protagonist’s adventurous life. Red lipstick and black turtleneck sweaters. The feeling after a great workout. The smell of strong, fresh coffee. A playful punch from a friend. Opening up to someone and feeling understood. Playing with a rambunctious puppy and cuddling it after you’re both tired out. Taking a secret to the grave.
Enneagram 9: Sunday morning pancakes. A huge, cozy scarf in the fall. Relaxing with a group of friends who know you well. A day where nothing is scheduled. Helping a friend feel better. Sunflowers in the summer. Ordering your favourite dish at your favourite restaurant. Flickering candles in the evening. A knowing smile. The pride of having achieved your goal. The feeling after a warm bath. Warm pumpkin pie and slowly melting whipped cream.
Me: I’m having such a good time
Brain: sure would suck if you get hit with a low mood, and go nonverbal, and come off as rude and uninterested in your friends
Me:
Sometimes people will decide who you are.
It won't be based on truth. It'll be based on their perception of you.
No matter what you tell them, or how you explain the reasoning behind your actions, they have made up their minds.
Everything good that happens will because of your efforts, will be seen as things that happened despite of you.
People who defend you or stick up for you will be seen as having "a temporary lack of judgement".
For people with ADHD, this will happen more.
They'll call it lazy and unwilling.
Explanations will be called excuses.
They'll repeat the same advice. "Ask for help", even when you tell them you struggle with that.
They'll see your response caused by previous trauma as stubbornness. They'll think you think you know better, they'll think you ignore advice because you forgot.
Your efforts will not be seen.
They'll misinterpret your character.
And you'll be powerless.
I know all of you have experienced this. I know you read this and you can tell me exactly who it was and in what context. A teacher, an employer, a parent (although I really hope it wasn't a parent), maybe a former "friends", or a distant relative.
We all have that same story.
But we are not that person they think we are.
We are valid and true.
They can not decide our character.
They do not have the right. They do not deserve us. They're not worthy of your time, your efforts, your loyalty.
Hold on to that person that had your back.
They are worth it.