Well Out Of The Blue I Just Remembered Today The Time I Accidentally Joined The Cast Of A Production

I think the best piece of character design advice I ever received was actually from a band leadership camp I attended in june of 2017. 

the speaker there gave lots of advice for leaders—obviously, it was a leadership camp—but his saying about personality flaws struck me as useful for writers too. 

he said to us all “your curses are your blessings and your blessings are your curses” and went on to explain how because he was such a great speaker, it made him a terrible listener. he could give speeches for hours on end and inspire thousands of people, but as soon as someone wanted to talk to him one on one or vent to him, he struggled with it. 

he had us write down our greatest weakness and relate it to our biggest strength (mine being that I am far too emotional, but I’m gentle with others because I can understand their emotions), and the whole time people are sharing theirs, my mind was running wild with all my characters and their flaws.

previously, I had added flaws as an after thought, as in “this character seems too perfect. how can I make them not-like-that?” but that’s not how people or personalities work. for every human alive, their flaws and their strengths are directly related to each other. you can’t have one without the other.

is your character strong-willed? that can easily turn into stubbornness. is your character compassionate? maybe they give too many chances. are they loyal? then they’ll destroy the world for the people they love.

it works the other way around too: maybe your villain only hates the protagonist’s people because they love their own and just have a twisted sense of how to protect them. maybe your antagonist is arrogant, but they’ll be confident in everything they do.

tl;dr “your curses are your blessings, and your blessings are your curses” there is no such thing as a character flaw, just a strength that has been stretched too far.

BIG NEWS

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little things i’ve learned:

one: pay attention to the music you’re relating to. sometimes it’s a clear indicator that something is wrong. other times, it’s an indicator that something is very, very right. when the latter happens, pay extra close attention.

two: true control is subtle, not obsessive. you may not even know that you have it when you do. people who are in control do not question it. they just are.

three: never pass up the opportunity to stick the tips of your fingers out the window of a moving car. feel the wind carry you to the sound of your favorite songs. this is a reminder that you’re alive.

four: thoughts don’t have to mean anything. you can just let them be there.

five: notice when you’re struggling and allow yourself some leeway when you do. however, learn the difference between giving yourself leeway and enabling your struggle. 

six: you cannot build self-love from a foundation of self-hatred. first, work toward self-acceptance. love will follow.

seven: do not love others simply because they love you back. do not expend your love on people who won’t love you back. 

eight: don’t forget to stop and look around. take a moment a day to stop doing and just be. the mindfulness hype isn’t overrated. there’s a reason for it.

nine: setting limits and saying no will not end any relationship worth keeping. 

ten: friendships built on moments of competitive misery are not healthy. if you find that you’re having the urge to constantly showcase your misery around someone, take that as a red flag. sadness is not a competition you want to win.

eleven: recovery is not about being happy. some days you will feel bored and flat. but these days are still better than those you built around destroying yourself. these days are still victories. recovery is about being alive.

twelve: when you’ve built an identity around being sad, the concept of happiness may scare you. giving that sadness up will strip you of most everything and leave you feeling empty. embrace this emptiness and fill it up with exploration. you’ll find that it’s worth it.

thirteen: you will not come out of your coldest days the same as you were going into them. this is not a bad thing. someday, you’ll be warm enough to feel the sun on your face again.

Are you a “please don’t ever touch me ever” or “I survive on hugs and cuddles” kind of person

Tall, big tiddies, smiley, glowing eyes….

I had to doodle it… It struck me so suddenly LMAO

(I was gonna make Deku Baku and Todo as his ‘daughters’ but I didnt feel like it… and frankly Im not contributing to Horis propaganda.)

I hate it when your parents are like “I know you better than you know yourself!” Like no you don’t