Arthur: *Sees Merlin Waiting For Him Outside The Council Hall*

the king has a large problem. The hero that was summoned thinks slavery is "a bad thing" and women "should have rights"

Friends dogo

gonna be honest, seeing Chishiya in a collar got me sweating

What did Arthur think Merlin was hiding from him?

I fully believe that Arthur knew Merlin was hiding something, he just didn’t know for sure what it was. Or he felt no need to bring it up because he believes Merlin is good and trusts him enough with secrets, or he thinks Merlin has a good reason for not telling him because of either his status or just not being ready to talk about it.

The reasons aren’t important here.

So my top theory is that Arthur knew Merlin was gay and just assumed it was a secret. (It really wasn’t.)

But how unhinged would Arthur go in his theories?

Does Arthur think Merlin has a group of pets he shouldn’t have because they’re all wild animals? And that’s why he hates hunting. Like a small family of 4 wolves, a couple of owls he trained to stay close to Camelot, a few deer, maybe a boar or two but they’re all his best friends so whenever he’s “at the tavern” he’s actually just frolicking in the woods with his unpetable pets.

Or does he think Merlin is training to join the circus or something? The juggling had to come from somewhere so maybe he’s planning to ask Arthur to become a jester more than a manservant? Arthur would hate it, because he couldn’t drag Merlin around everywhere but he’d do it if it meant Merlin would be happy.

Maybe he’s got some obscure hobby involving maps so next time he just knows stuff, it’s because he’s just a huge nerd. Maybe he’s secretly a genius who spends all his time in the library.

I need theories, please.

Arthur becoming a conspiracy theorist because he doesn’t want to think about whatever the real thing Merlin is hiding is hilarious to me. Maybe he even spreads a few rumours to keep Merlin’s secret safe, whatever it is.

*the knights and merlin travelling the outskirts of Camelot’s forests*

Elyan: Do you guys see these weird markings on the tree?

Percival: Yeah, I’ve seen a few of them a few yards back.

Leon: And you didn’t tell anyone? That could be marks of enemies!

Gwaine: They are. Bandits leave behind signs when they leave an area for other bandits. Or just to remind themselves when they come back.

Lancelot: Do you know what these say? We didn’t had bandits in a while.

Gwaine: I am not sure. If I read this correctly it means “no good looting” and “beware of harmless looking guy picking herbs”.

Merlin: *cold sweat*

Arthur: *laughs* Be careful everyone! Merlin might tear us apart limb by limb!

Merlin: *eyes glow*

Arthur: *branch almost falls on him, spooking his horse*

Lancelot: 👀

Merlin: 🤷🏻‍♂️

Arthur: I think Merlin’s mad at me.

Leon: What makes you say that?

Arthur: Watch.

Arthur: Hey, Merlin?

Merlin, formally: Yes, sire?

Gwaine, looking horrified: What in the five kingdoms did you do?!

Someone: What's wrong with your friend?

Gwaine: Nothing. He's handsome.

Someone: I didn't say he was ugly. I asked what was wrong with him.

ah fuck fuck the "so you're not an idiot, that was another lie"//"no, just another part of my charm" exchange where merlin smiles all cheekily over his shoulder because if arthur's calling him an idiot all is okay but then he meets arthur's eyes and remembers why they're here, why they weren't okay in the first place, and his smile just shatters like he's not sure he's allowed to joke around with his best friend anymore