You Accidentally Cross A Witch, And She Curses You, Saying “You Can Only Speak Lies”. Unfortunately,

The meaning of life is to sleep

Mori and Dazai whump

Dazai woke up cuffed to the operating table. He vaguely remembers fighting Mori as he tried to put the IV in. He’d be punished for that later, for now, Mori smiled down at him before explaining what he had done to Dazai in grueling detail. 

“After you took all those nsaids, your stomach was worn down to a flatulent piece of tissue. Must have been painful. To save your life, I had to give you a whole new stomach!” Mori proclaimed excitedly.

Dazai focused his attention on the shelves of medicine. From acetaminophen to oxycodone, Mori had everything. Dazai’s eyes lingered on the oxy. He swallowed as a wave of nausea overcame him, having just undergone anesthesia. 

He smelled lemon mixed with the usual sterile scent of Mori’s office, meaning he was currently being given antibiotics. Probably for the infection in his left upper thigh. 

Mori was probably scolding him for cutting himself to the laffy taffy again, but he was too high to care.

He was tapped on the shoulder by Elise, who said, “Mori said you have to entertain me while he does some more work!”

He sighed at the sadistic girl and found the strength to lift the doll he was handed, as she un-cuffed him.

"Please, I wish for food!" The child cried.

I spawn the most luxurious buffet for them, "And for your second wish?"

"A house!" The child said between bites of lobster.

I spawn a mansion, "Your third wish?"

The child stopped in thought for a moment before speaking, "A loving family, please!"

Nothing appeared and I grinned, "Hello, I'm your new dad."

The two of us lived a happy life.

You’re a Genie with thousands of years of bad luck. It seams that every time someone finds the lamp, they are evil or corrupt and you are bound to grant terrible wishes. One day an child in torn clothes finds you and begs for food.

i hate the word dilate

fun fact! satan canonically has cat stickers on his laptop. bros a cutie patootie like that

4ggravate goes to barbie!!!

They have no idea what is occurring on their heads

My friend @whoishalf and I have been talking about a BSD AU with Dunmeshi and I've been sketching ideas for the races of my favorite ADA characters. In this AU they are a secondary organization to the Canaries but are famous for admitting members of different races into their organization.

In this AU (sigzai as one of the main ships) Dazai went to an unknown dungeon with the intention of looking for the edible and poisonous monstersd to find a quick and effective death, on the way he found a snake with the named Sigma who is instantly interested in testing his poison, Sigma is pretty weirded out of the strange human that crossed his path.

On the other hand (Ranpoe obviously) Ranpo is part of the canaries but is more interested in reaching the bottom of the dungeons and revealing the mystery of their creation, he joins the party of his childhood friend Poe who is an academic magician Interested in studying the dark magics of the dungeons of the world, against his will Ranpo joins his little party and they have adventures, I guess. I hope to create more things for this silly AU

Need to solve a dispute

Tyga Baby cat