"This Time I'll Let You Lead"

"but don't stop.."

Naked Cuddles with Astarion 🥰🦇

After he kills Cazador and spends some quality time ✨️ with you on his grave he thinks he's all healed now and can be intimate with you with no disgust or loathing

Oh how wrong he was

The grave intimacy was amazing, he was present, focusing only on you, the best night he has ever had

The next time he tries to have a "night of passion" with you is right after you defeat the netherbrain, as a reward and also a celebration

But the unwanted happened: he dissociated

He didn't even realize he wasn't there until you tapped him on the shoulder

It felt like a dagger to his back, but from himself. What went wrong? Cazador was dead. Tadpoles were gone. You were there with him despite everything. Why can't he just have sex with you like a normal person?!

Because healing takes time baby boy 🥺

He ran away that night. Because of anger, shame, desperation, he didn't know. Maybe all of it?

He only showed up two days later, apologizing and offering to continue, claiming to do better this time and not dissappoint you

You just hugged him and told him he didn't need to, that you'll be happy if the two of you just talk under the stars like you used to back in camp

He wants to agree and spend time with you but he blurts out no. He's angry at himself more than you. He just wants to give you everything you deserve, including a proper relationship with everything that belongs to it

You reassure him you understand but he needs time to properly heal

"Time? What should I wait for? Cazador's dead, I'm under no one's control, the wretched worms are gone and the two of us are together. I should be okay!"

It takes some time for him to calm down and admit what he has subconsciously known: he isn't ready yet. No matter how much he wants to be

You see his struggle. He wants it all at once now that he's free

Seeing him in this state makes you want to help him but there's seemingly nothing you can do. Except...

With a smile and no other word you take him by the hand and lead him to your shared bedroom

You start pulling your clothes off of you and you can feel him smirk behind you, until you finally reveal your plan to him

"We'll strip and cuddle. Nothing more. You need to explore other ways of being intimate, not just sex."

He's a bit puzzled to say the least. He has never heard of laying with someone naked as the day they were born and just...lay. By all logic and what he's known for most of his life it makes no sense. How can someone get pleasure out of just laying? He imagines it would be similair to locking him in a bloodbank but forbidding him from touching anything

Regardless, he starts stripping. If this is some manipulative tactic of yours it's pretty weak but he wants to see where this will go

No tactic, no ill intention, the two of you strip and get under the covers

He lays down after you and for a second has no idea what to do. Should he embrace you first? Should he wait for you?

Carefully, as if aproaching a stray cat, you move closer to him and slowly lay your head on his cool chest

The lack of clothes makes this a completely new experience for both of you, the contrast between your warm living body and his cold undead one is much more evident now

After a while you get a bit bolder and fully cuddle up to him, arm wrapping around his torso, your legs locking around one of his

When he felt your sex press against his thigh he expected to get aroused. Logically he should, right?

But he didn't. And neither did you. You just sighed and relaxed more

Astarion propped up his head with one of his hands, the other one brushed along your spine up and down

"This feels... nice."

You smile against his pectoral, silently celebrating your small victory

As you begin to drift off, lulled by his rhythmic breathing, he makes his own step forward and turns fully towards you, one hand on your lower back pushing your torsos together, the other pulls your thigh up and hooks it around his hip

If he was hard and you moved just a bit downwards he would slip right inside you, so close and yet

He nuzzles his face into your neck and plants a little kiss on your pulse point, over the marks he's made on you while feeding on your blood

"This is really nice," he purrs like a cat

When you wake up the next morning you remain in the same position as when you fell asleep, the only difference is Astarion's hands: firmly planted on your ass

After your first little intimate session he feels a lot more relaxed, behaves a bit more carefree, a bit happier over all

You try to carefully suggest couple of more cuddlings but he needs little convincing

Once the door to the bedroom is closed all clothes are off

Almost. Every. Night.

It was like entering a whole new universe for him, he wanted to explore everything this new arrangement could offer him

The two of you tried every position you could think of, it kinda reminded you of sex minus the sweaty mess afterwards

On the bed, spooning, chest to chest, sitting down, him between your legs, you between his, on the love seat, random windowsill, standing behind you with his amrs wrapped around you while cooking

When you had very busy days but still wanted the skin to skin he would go shirtless, tear your own shirt off of you and hug you as long as he could

An absolute power trip for him would be if you were the only naked one, sitting in his lap while he himself sat somewhere, either a couch or some random chair

Makes his imagination run wild. What if he had ascended back then? He would think of how he would make you slowly strip infront of him while he sat on a throne of sorts in Cazador's, now his, palace. How your naked body would dance against the finest silk of his robes as he took you over and over again

As much as this little idea aroused him he was glad it stayed only in the realms of "what if". He couldn't imagine how ascession would corrupt him and rob him of what he currently has

He loved taking you in missionary, but he might love having you sit on his lap a bit more

Your soft breasts preassing into him, head resting on his shoulder, giving him the perfect angle to grab your ass and squeeze it like a stress toy

Not to mention your weight grounding him in case his mind decided to wander against his will

However the more often you spend time like this, either sleeping cuddled up together or just hanging out, the less he felt his consciousness slipping away. Maybe all he really needed was to adjust his body and mind to intimacy, convice them he's safe with you, that he doesn't need to escape anymore

On one such cuddle session, when he had you comfortably on his lap and his back against the head of the bed, he desperately wanted to suggest trying to make love again

But something inside him, maybe an intuition or fear, told him he might not be ready yet, he might fuck it up again, dissapoint you, and return back to ground zero

Instead he suggested kissing. Small innocent pecks

You agreed with such enthusiasm, it made his heart almost skip a beat

The two of you agreed to go with the flow and let whatever would happen play out, see how far the two of you could go

It really started out innocently

At first you peppered his whole face with small kisses, not leaving one centimeter of skin untouched

He loved being admired, but he wanted to give some of his loving too

At first with pecks

Then proper kiss

An open mouthed kiss soon followed

A tongue slipped out and inside the other one's mouth soon after

You didn't even realize it and you were making out for almost an hour now

It wasn't rushed like when hot passion hurries you, it was slow, intimate, comfortable. Like two people who had all the time in the world and decided to slow down and enjoy eachother

This first make out session didn't lead to anything more, none of you minded. Astarion was happy, so were you. But most importantly he hasn't dissociated in almost a month now

You still cuddled every day, pyjamas and other sleepwear became foreign concepts in your household, maybe one day one of your make out sessions will probably lead to more, who knows

But you do know that if it ever will lead to proper love making, it would be on Astarions's terms. Once he knows and feels he's ready

Until then you'll happily enjoy his naked form just pressed against yours every single night

I think you said a while back that you’re writing the fanfic series with an explanation in mind for the connection between earth and toril. Can we shoot you with our guesses? I got a theory over the weekend and I’m wondering how close I got.

I actually just finished the chapter where Gale goes full nerd in speculation. I probably won’t confirm anything or not, but if you want to, I am curious to see what people’ve picked up on.

Please reblog this if fanfiction has been beneficial to your mental health.

When the heroes are not in the camp

figured i'd post this amazing gif commission of Raven & Astarion from @froschkuss from a while back. (2021) i'm still completely mesmerized by it. ♡

A companion comic to this one; Tav likes Astarion's fangs, Astarion realizes he really likes seeing her in his shirt with his bite marks on her neck.

Big fan of the trope that Astarion is a little too possessive over the things he cares about deems important, partially because he's a selfish little creature, but mostly because he didn't have anything to call his own under Cazador. ((Also featuring a showboating Wyll, and a skeptical Lae'zel; I love them both so much, they're such dorks.))

you know even if a homeless person or a starving person is in that position because of their own "bad decisions" i don't care. it doesn't matter. no supposed financial misstep is enough to condemn someone to homelessness or poverty.

Another gameplay and again I have a scene that I've seen many times and still love it. BG3 has many beautiful scenes, but this is my favorite. It's also my favorite romance scene I've had in a game romance. ❤️ Why do I love this scene so much? ❤️ Let's analyze 🥰.

Note: the scene I am analyzing is the version after defeating Yurgir.

~ I really appreciate romance scenes that are not based on erotica. There is zero erotica here and it is not necessary to show the emotions and feelings of the characters. I think that this scene is very romantic in its own way.

~ Beautiful portrayal of the character's trauma and his attitude towards himself. Astarion has very low self-esteem, he believes that he is not able to offer anything to another person except a passionate night. He is very surprised when Tav hugs him - someone sees in him something more than a one-night sex partner. Also he is not used to this type of touch - touch without any sexual contention from someone who really feels something for him. At first he is paralyzed, he doesn't know what to do next. Later he is calm, relaxed, you can see that he needed this hug.

~ Here we have the real Astarion, without the mask. An elf who has been broken, who doesn't know how to be with another person, he is confused and lost.

~ Neil's acting, his voice breaking when Astarion says that he doesn't know how to be with another person, although he really wants to. By the way I love about Neil that from his voice we can tell when Astarion is putting on a mask and when he is sincere.

~ I consider this scene (and the entire Astarion romance) to be a huge reward for the player. Astarion is in "survival at all costs" mode and he is not interested in others. But you're the only person he's interested in, also he wants to have with you serious relationship. You showed him kindness, interest in his problems. Someone finally listened to him after over 200 years. It's very sad, but also very beautiful.

To all the people from Larian who were involved in this scene - thank you ! You did a great job and one of the most beautiful romance in games ❤️.