Strong!reader - Blog Posts

IMAGINE ending a love affair with Addam of Hull:

Strong-Targaryen!Reader x Addam of Hull

MDNI

CW: Angst, power imbalance, s-xually suggestive themes, bastard drama, star-crossed lovers.

Addam of Hull had never felt so seen. Not until the day you put your eyes to him. Even Seasmoke hadn’t made him stand as still as your smile had.

An instant draw. Something instant. Powerful.

The mutual passion of two bastards in a place so hallowed as Dragonstone. Almost embarrassing in its predictability.

Your lips trailing his jaw, his palms flat on your back. Laces undone and clothing pooling around your ankles. All is right in the hour of the wolf. All is quiet, all is right. Addam can pretend he is just a man and you are just a woman. Two lovers tangled in a bed too large to sleep alone in.

That was how it started. And for many nights after, it was how it stayed. Alas, night always turned to dawn.

Addam could still feel your fingernails pressing into his back. A sting that made the pleasure of your night together all the more intoxicating.

But as he broke fast, all he felt was guilt.

Your mother had let him sleep where only Princes had laid, gave him a place at her table. He knew that this was wrong of him. It was easier for him to remember this in the daylight, when he awoke alone in a bed of silk and the smell of you still lingering around him. Addam would wash his face and stare into his reflection in the mirror thinking: ‘No good can come of this.’

And then night would fall, your shy knocking would sound behind his door and he would let you in. The taste of your kiss and the song of your pleasure would erase all his worries. The cycle continuing on and on… until this night.

You came to him dressed in a robe of blue velvet and nothing else. Love made you bold. Addam could not stop your lips from touching his own. Not because you threw yourself at him, but because of his own selfishness. ‘One last kiss,’ he swore. And then one turned into three, then the tie of your robe came loose. Control found him just before he cupped your bare breasts.

“We cannot carry on like this,” he says as he breaks the kiss “It’s wrong.”

Undeterred, your arms slip over his broad shoulders and you try to pull him closer, “Addam, you say this nearly every night.” His hands feel warm, almost hot, against your hips as he keeps you from pushing yourself flush against him.

Normally, he would laugh and lift you from your feet like a groom to his bride. Not tonight. His expression was tight, jaw tense. Your cheeky grin fell, “Addam?”

Addam closes his eyes as your hand cups his cheek. If he were a stronger man, he could push you away. Perhaps say something cruel to break your heart and end this affair. Addam damns himself as he leans into your touch, “I know I do. What I say is true no matter how many times we ignore it.”

“What we do is only wrong if anyone besides you or I know of it. And nobody has to know,” you coax. Something about his tone, his words, it bothers you. It’s like he’s lecturing you on morality. You get enough of that from your mother.

He finally works up the nerve to take his hands off of you, stepping back from your partially nude form. Addam focuses hard on your face, “You deserve better than to be my secret.”

“I am the one who decides what I deserve, Addam,” you scoff. Your confidence was your most attractive trait in his opinion. He had to remind himself what he was meant to do.

“And what if I don’t want to be a secret either? I’ve lived all my life that way,” he challenged with a tense jaw. “What’s the point in living out another lie? To live in shame, again?”

You step closer, your hands take his. Bastards like him… and like you, all that you are is someone’s secret passions made flesh. “You are not alone in those feelings, Addam. We’ve spoken on this. I don’t want us to be lovers in the shadows for all time. I want you. I... We both—“

“—We are not the same and you know that,” he forces his hands to break your hold on him.

You close your robe tight and reply, “If you want this to end, I will honor that. But not if you are doing this just to protect me. Or the fucking throne. It has to be what you want. We started this as two people. We should end it the same way.”

This was his chance. He could be a better man and set you free. Free to marry a good Lord of a good House. Addam may have a dragon and place at the Queen’s table, but he knew he could never have you. Not like he wanted to. Addam crosses his arms over his chest and says, “You lived all your life as a Princess, the Iron Throne will be yours one day. There is no room for me beside you on the throne, nor in your bed. I will happily bend my knee to you but that is all we can afford.”

Your nostrils flare and you glare into his face, “You’re still just protecting me.”

“I want you to go back to your rooms, and when day breaks, we forget each other’s touch. I want this to end,” he hates the way his voice sounds in his ears. Like Lord Corlys, barking orders as his ship leaves the docks. Prideful, cold.

The anger in your eyes is still burning hot, even as your expression cools. “So it shall be. Goodnight, Addam of Hull.”

You tighten the sash of your robe and leave him to sleep in a bed too big and a room too empty.

“Goodnight, Princess.”